Season Four: Through the Cracks
by Ultimate Naco Topping
Summary: Depressed about Season Four of Kim Possible coming to an end? Well, come on in and see the adventure continue. Action! Humor! Romance! Really bad puns! It's all here, so what are you waiting Four?
1. Introduction

Hello, and welcome to _Season Four: Through the Cracks!_ Those of you who have been here a while will remember this as my old _Season Four_ back when KP's future was up in the air. For those of you who are new, each chapter is a self-contained episode styled as close to the show as possible in regards to style, substance, form, and canon. Just like a real episode, each chapter will have a cold open (that chunk before the opening credits that normally sets up the plot or the theme of the episode), an Act I, Act II, and Act III (each with a break at the end and a 'reset' at the beginning), and an end credits 'tag' (those new little chunks at the end tying up the lose ends with a joke). Think of this as a fan-inspired companion piece to the real thing. Since the first few chapters are reposts of stuff that was written _before_ the new episodes started airing, you may notice some jokes, gags, or plots that the actual writers of the show figured out for themselves (grumble, grumble), but there's nothing I can do about that…

Updates will be every Thursday (as I'd like to get to the _new_ stuff as quickly as possible) and if you take the time to review, I will take the time to respond as my way of saying thank you. Anyway, I know how boring and pretentious introductions like this can sound so I'll let you get going. Enjoy!


	2. Awkwierd Silence

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation._

* * *

_Episode 1: Awkwierd Silence_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

A warm morning sun bathed Middleton, USA in a soft glow of peace, tranquility, and springtime. Birds chirped while fluttering about their morning chores. Squirrels left tracks in the morning dew as they went after their breakfast acorns. The citizens, up early for a Saturday morning, went about measuring the blast holes in their roofs and walls before setting off to the local hard ware store. Meanwhile a city garbage truck collected piles upon piles of devilish looking toys. As the truck's driver passed one particular ranch styled home, he wondered how they had repaired their damage so quickly, but realizing stranger things had already happened, he picked up two more of the fast food prizes and continued on his route.

--

In the breakfast nook, Dr. James Timothy Possible sat behind his morning paper looking proudly at the front page. Below the headline of "**Kim Possible Foils Diablo Scheme **– Dr. Drakken in Custody**"** was a picture of his teen hero daughter. Beaming confidently next to her was Ron Stoppable, her long-time best friend and sidekick. The pair watched as Drakken, Shego and the rest of his henchmen were hauled away by the authorities. The picture was almost perfect—almost. James was just about to wonder about where that Eric fellow was when…

Kim floated into the room almost on a cloud humming a light but familiar melody.

"Morning, Kimmie-cub," the Possible patriarch said.

"Morning, daddy," she replied giving her father a kiss on the forehead before continuing on to the cereal cabinet. As her father watched her resume humming and take a seat across from him in a love enhanced stupor, James decided no further questions about the previous night were needed. Everything seemed to have turned out all right.

Dr. Angela Possible's first observation upon entering her kitchen was of her daughter merely stirring her cereal around in her bowl. Eating it seemed to be the furthest thing from the young redhead's mind as she continued to hum away. _To be young and in love,_ she thought pouring herself a cup of coffee before joining her husband.

"Good morning, Kimmie," she said. "Sorry we didn't wait up for you last night. How was the rest of the prom with Eric?"

A moment passed before the words registered in Kim's mind, but once they did her body jerked back as she dropped her spoon. A look of deer in headlights terror covered her face. Her parents stared back at her instantly suspicious of such a reaction. Her mind was off to the races _Oh no! I completely forgot, _she thought. _How do I tell them about…?_

"Kim, is there something you'd like to tell us?" Her father asked almost menacing. James had set down his paper and Angela had placed her hand on her hip. Worst of all, Kim was now facing every teenager's worst nightmare: the Double-Barreled Eyebrow of Parental Inquisition.

Kim took several quick breathes as her eyes darted around the room desperately avoiding eye contact with her parents. Her mouth tried to form words. Nothing came out, however, except a nervous rasping. She touched her face as her thoughts continued to swirl. _Okay, Kim, you can do this. Nothing like good old no thrills honesty to get you through._ Kim took one last deep breath, sitting up and straightening her shoulders, she squared her eyes to her parents.

"Okay, here goes. After Ron and I drew the Diablos away from here and shut down the signal at Bueno Nacho, Drakken came over the Kimunicator and he had captured Eric. So we changed to mission mode and went to Bueno Nacho headquarters and got ambushed by Shego and that stupid sumo ninja and I thought we won when I saw Eric and I went to him but he captured me because he was really a synthodrone Drakken made to play me...," the words spilled out of Kim's mouth like water over a breached dam. Her parents tried to follow along picking up just enough to comprehend. Another deep breath and she continued.

"...and when I woke up, Ron and I were tied to giant Tex-mex props and I had given up but Ron as all like, 'Don't give up. You've still got me.' and like basically said that he loved me and I was like 'Of course, how did I miss it?' And then Rufus jumped out and untied us and we totally went to take out Drakken and Shego and Ron was like, fighting Eric and I was taking on Shego and we were on the roof and I was about to take out the signal tower when Eric caught the pulse emitter.

"But Rufus bit his shoe and Eric just turned into an oozy pile and there was a big explosion that took out the control tower and the Diablos returned to normal. Then after the police locked up Drakken and Shego, Ron and I went back to the prom, well, um, together and Bonnie was all like, 'Kim's finally with Ron,' but everyone cheered instead of laughing like she wanted and then we danced and I was thinking 'Am I really slow dancing with Ron?' And I could totally tell he was thinking the same thing but then it just-like-felt so right _and we looked into each other's eyes and we knew things were all different and we kissed!_ And now Ron and I are together!" Kim finished panting.

Speechless, the two parents shot each other sideways glances before returning to their daughter with looks of shock. Most of what Kim had to say was meaningless babble, but the ending contained something far bigger than thwarting an army of giant cybertronic robots – at least in this household.

"You and Ron are together?" they said in unison after a moment of silence.

Kim sank into her chair and let out a nervous laugh. "Hu, ha. Kind of a sitch, huh?"

As the three Possibles all stared at each other letting the incredible news hang in the air, the aforementioned Ron Stoppable strolled in smiling ear to ear just as he had for years wearing the same old red jersey.

"Good morning, Possibles," he said oblivious to the mood of the room. "How'd you guys fix the roof so fast?" His arm snaked around Kim's shoulder as he leaned in and pecked her on the cheek.

When no one replied to his previous inquiry, the blonde was forced to take a closer look at the situation. Kim kept her nervous smile but her eyes screamed in terror. Knowing he probably shouldn't look at Mr. and Mrs. Dr. P., he did anyway just to confirm they too had contorted their faces to new positions of bewilderment. Though he stayed nearly cheek to cheek with Kim, his arm found its way back to his side.

"Kim, please don't tell me that you _just now_ told them," he said almost in a whisper. Kim recoiled from him a bit not wanting to look directly at him. She let out another shaky laugh.

"They've had, well..., a _few _seconds to let it sink in," came Kim's nervous reply.

Catching Mr. Dr. Possible's confusion morph into an icy stare, Ron winced out, "I'm so getting sent into a black hole."

* * *

James Possible loomed arms folded with Mrs. Dr. Possible one hand on her shoulder and the other covering her mouth. Kim leaned as far back as she could but was pinned in her seat. Her hand now held Ron's who had curled himself into a whimpering ball on the ground next to her. Even Rufus felt the need to shield himself in the potted plant behind them.

"Kim, Ron," Mr. Dr. Possible said sternly. "I'll have you know that the Misses and I are very disappointed..."

Kim looked to Ron who was no help at all. "And I leave my vampire, werewolf, and zombie video games to Felix. Rufus? You're in charge of my fossilized cheese collection...," Ron squeaked. Kim gulped as she turned back towards her father.

"Yes, very disappointed," Mr. Dr. Possible continued but his sharp look suddenly softened. "That you two took so long to figure things out."

Kim's look of fear flopped off of her face as concerned confusion took over. _Did he just say what I thought he said?_

Mrs. Dr. Possible removed her hand to reveal a sly smile. "You two are so cute together," she squealed.

Kim leaned forward a bit a little more confident about the situation. "So, you two are okay with, um, us?" Kim inquired.

"Of course we are. We couldn't be happier," Mrs. Dr. Possible replied.

Kim exhaled and relaxed as the two Dr. Possibles had a laugh. Rufus leaped out from his hiding spot and squeaked a "Boo-yah!" Kim turned to Ron who she found still huddled on the floor mumbling.

"Ron, you can get up now. It's okay," Kim said calmly. But her words did not break Ron out of his terrified rant.

"...and my only regret is that I didn't find the right topping for the Ultimate Naco...," he shakily said.

"Ron!" Kim barked as Ron finally snapped to. "The 'rents are totally cool with us."

Ron jumped to and faced Kim. "Really? They are? Phew. The quest for the Ultimate Naco topping can continue," Ron dutifully stated as if it was his one true mission in life. Kim's parents began to walk out of the kitchen. As Mr. Dr. Possible passed Ron, he leaned in towards the boy.

"And don't worry about all that black hole business. It's just a little father/boyfriend joke--as_ long as you keep my Kimmie-cub happy_," Dr. Possible said eyes narrowing.

Ron cowered a bit with a nervous chuckle but choked out, "You got it, sir."

"You kids have fun today," Mrs. Dr. Possible said as she and her husband adjourned to the other room. Ron rubbed the back of his neck with Kim's hand firmly planted in the other.

"Well, that went pretty well wouldn't you say, K...?" Ron asked but before he could finish, Kim coiled and launched forward planting a firm kiss onto to his unsuspecting lips. As she pulled away, Ron's face was flush red.

"I'll take that as a yes," Ron barely eeped out.

"Looks like we've got a whole day together," Kim said coyly.

Ron got himself a bit more composed, but still sounded uncertain. "So, uh, what do you want to do?"

Kim paused--his question actually caught her off guard. Now, Kim was racked with uncertainty. True they had the whole day together, but what were they supposed to do now?

"I don't know," came her reply. "I guess we could watch some TV."

--

The familiar 'boinks' and 'kablooms' emanated from the television as the Saturday morning cartoons flashed on the screen. The Tweebs sat within a foot of the set on the floor shoveling heaps of cereal into their mouths leaving large puddles of milk on the floor.

Kim and Ron were seated on the couch holding hands, but both careful not to be too close to one another. Ron, who would normally be enthralled by anything on television, kept only a vacant stare on the set. Kim made no such pretense of being interested in the show. She took every instance to look around at other things, especially Ron. With each quick glance at each other, the pair tried to feel out whether they should say something, or do something, or _anything._ Ron tried to smoothly break the silence.

"So,..., uh" he said barely smooth and barely audible.

"Want to go to the mall?" Kim quickly blurted.

"Sounds great," Ron said as he snapped to his feet dragging Kim up with him forgetting that they were still holding hands.

--

People meandered through the Middleton Mall on the almost perfect Saturday afternoon. Kim strolled hand in hand with Ron looking at shop after shop but still weaving her familiar pattern to Club Banana.

Though their inability to carry a conversation at the moment was making him a bit uncomfortable, Ron was still ecstatic. _We're holding hands in public. We're holding hands in public._ Ron thought trying to make sure he didn't accidentally yell it out loud. _Now if only I could figure out what she was thinking..._ Ron's mind quipped.

_We're holding hands in public. We're holding hands in public._ Kim thought joyfully--barely able to focus on anything else. Still, the silence was crushing. Kim and Ron finally made it to Club Banana.

"Oh, my gosh they didn't!" Kim screamed jerking Ron to the middle of the store and the rack of new fashions. She picked up a top with wavy multicolored '70s lines.

"Wow, retro," Ron said.

"Retro is the new black," Kim stated matter-of-factly. Ron took a slightly confused look.

"But I thought that you said that a style can't replace a color, K.P.," Ron stated but quickly regretting it fearful of saying anything to offend.

"It can if 'they' say it can," called a voice from behind. Kim and Ron turned to find Monique sliding up to them with a look of glee on her face.

"Hey, Monique," Kim said as she released Ron's hand to hug her friend.

"You two are so the talk of everyone in town!" Monique exclaimed.

"We are?" Ron asked shocked.

"There isn't a person alive today that doesn't know. Do you know how many betting pools there were on you two? And Bonnie eating it like she did. I swear she was going to combust," Monique continued. "You guys make me so happy I want to cry, but I'll let you two get back to _things_."

"Thanks, Mon," Kim shyly said as Monique walked away. She turned back to Ron who seemed a bit distressed over Monique's gossip. _The whole town was rooting for 'us'?_ Ron thought. Neither Kim nor Ron could speak, not knowing what to say and still awkwardly looking around. The silence was only interrupted by Ron's stomach making an obnoxiously loud growl.

"I'm hungry too. Let's go!" Kim declared quickly pulling Ron out of the store.

--

Kim and Ron walked with loaded trays to their usual booth at Bueno Nacho. As he seated himself, Ron looked across the table expecting to see Kim, but she wasn't in her spot. Glancing to his left, he saw her patiently waiting for him to make enough room on _his_ side. An awkward tick passed before he pressed himself against the window and Kim slid down next to him. _This is new. _Ron thought.

Rufus hopped onto the table and immediately began to chart out how he was going to proceed with lunch before diving in. Despite their apparent hunger, Kim and Ron just nibbled at their food.

Kim desperately searched for something, anything to normalize the situation. She took a breath and looked over at Ron.

"So, uh," Kim stuttered. _Uh-oh, Kim. Spoke before thinking. _Her thoughts stumbled trying to finish her sentence. "...how's...school?" _Dumb question, Possible! You asked him about school?_

Ron, who'd been holding his naco about half way to his mouth trying to force himself to take a bite, squirmed. For such a simple question, Ron was left dumbfounded. Now his mind stumbled to come up with a reply.

"Wah? School..? Uh, good," Ron said slowly. "Still, um, sitting next to you in all my classes." Ron paused as if to give Kim a chance to respond, but she did not--could not. "So, that's, um, good," he continued.

Despite the apparent frame up of a conversation, the two struggled to look at the other, both squirming as the awckweirdness reached dangerous levels. Suddenly, a familiar sound filled the silence.

_Beep-beep. Ba-beep,_ the Kimunicator chirped.

Kim and Ron immediately pulled themselves out of their defensive slumps and bristled to attention. Ron leaped out of the booth and over the table.

"I'll get our mission gear!" He shouted sprinting to the door before Kim could finish pulling her blue link to Wade out.

"Sitch us, Wade!" She shouted at Wade who was taken back at the overly direct statement.

"Whoa, wound a little tight, eh, love birds?" Wade asked with a smile.

"Wade, give us a mission--NOW!" Kim gritted without moving her clenched teeth.

"Okay, okay, easy. Just poking a little fun. Rumors are flying around that several world leaders are missing, but each of their governments are in full denial mode," Wade said switching back to his normal mission oriented self.

"Is there any evidence to confirm the rumors?" Kim asked a bit more relaxed.

"Not that any casual observer would see, but when I was looking at their travel plans, I found something interesting," Wade stated. Punching a few buttons, the Kimunicator screen flashed to a map of Europe with several animated airplanes floating across. "The flight path of each world leader's planes all crossed over the same spot." Each airplane's trail intersected and that spot became a flashing dot in the Alps.

"Awfully close to a certain Professor Dementor's lair," Kim said eyes focusing into mission mode. "Get us a ride and we're on our way."

"All ready on it, Kim," Wade replied as the transmission ended.

* * *

The harsh winter wind howled outside the entrance of a small cave. Two shadowy figures piled a small set of gear at the opening and began to trek deep into the cave's heart. Just as they seemed to be consumed by a never ending darkness, light faintly appeared ahead of them followed by the echoes of a sinister cackle.

Stepping out of the shadows, Kim and Ron crouched behind a towering stalagmite. Rufus was poking out of Ron's pocket, a freshly made snow cone in his paws.

"Hey, where'd you get that?" Ron whispered, hurt that he had not been offered one.

"Ron, sshhh..." Kim breathed out as she placed her hand over his mouth. Rufus stuck his tongue out at his friend and consumed the frozen treat.

In front of them the cave's roof opened and the source of the light and the evil laughter could be seen. Professor Dementor stood in front of a vast screen filling an entire side of the room. On video link was a less than happy Doctor Director in front of the various members of Global Justice.

At a large conference table in the middle of the room, several men and women in suites were restrained to their chairs each uncomfortably squirming and watching Dementor's rant.

"Zhe download of zhe launch codes iz to begin immediately!" Dementor screeched. "Onche all zhe worldz' mizziles are under mine control, I will releaze your leaderz!"

At the table, one man with a decidedly British accent piped up,

"Don't do it Doctor Director. We'll manage. At least give Team Possible a..."

"In caze you were wondering about zhat, each of your chairz haz been wired to be exploded at zhe zite of Kim Possible. All I have to do iz puzh this button," Dementor said cutting off the Brit and revealing a remote control. "Now, do we have an underztading?"

"Gotta hand some points to the Professor. Extortion _and_ blackmail," Ron whispered to Kim.

Doctor Director hung her head, no options available.

"Very well, commence the download," she said resigned. Dementor laughed with glee and began hitting buttons on the control panel. The display switched to show the download's progress.

From behind the rock, Kim pulled out the Kimunicator.

"Wade, Dementor will blow the leaders up the moment he sees us," she said.

"I figured there was a reason GJ didn't contact us. I was kind of counting on something like this. Reach into your backpack," Wade replied.

Kim discreetly reached in her bag and pulled out two wristbands. One said 'HIS', the other said 'HERS'.

"Very cute, Wade. What do they do?" Kim sarcastically quipped to her tech genius who was wearing a pleased smirk. She and Ron put the bracelets on.

"I've adapted my stealth technology from the Wadebot. Check it," Wade said flicking a button on his computer. Kim and Ron vanished--only a stealthy outline could be faintly seen.

"K.P., where'd you go?" Ron asked panicked. "Hey, where did I go?"

"Just be careful. I haven't worked out all the bugs on people yet. Too much contact in battle could short out the stealth circuits," Wade warned.

"Wade...," Kim tried to speak but was cutoff by Wade.

"I know. I rock," Wade stated smugly.

"Come on, we've got to get that controller before we take out Dementor," Kim ordered.

The two stealthy outlines of Kim and Ron came out of hiding and crossed the room and approached a distracted Dementor. The remote control had been placed next to a package of cheese crisps sitting on the computer panel. Kim and Ron were within mere feet of Dementor. As the stealthy silhouette of Kim's hand began to reach for the remote, the aroma of the cheese crisps popped Rufus out of Ron's pocket-his upper body now completely unstealthed. The naked mole rat was completely fixated on the tasty snack and began to coil to make a jump for them.

Out of the corner of Dementor's eye, he saw something that just didn't look right. He turned quickly but froze in shock at the site of _half_ a naked mole rat floating in the air. Kim's hand also froze just above the remote. Dementor broke out of his trance first and swatted at Rufus who leaped to the computer console. Dementor's arm missed and socked the invisible Kim square in the stomach knocking her back into Ron. The pair fell backwards into a heap and their stealthy outlines filled in. They were no longer invisible.

"I zhould have known!" Dementor ranted. "Big miztake!" He grabbed for the remote.

"Rufus, the controller!" Ron hollered.

The tiny mole rat jumped to Dementor's hand as he scooped the remote. With a ferocious bite, Rufus forced the remote to the floor and soon followed after giving it a kick across the floor to Ron's waiting hand.

Kim and Ron jumped up and took battle stances-Kim in the lead.

"Ron, free the hostages. I'll take Dementor," Kim commanded. Ron broke for the table while Kim advanced on Dementor.

"Oh, we'll have to zee about that. Guardz!" the yellowed villain ordered.

Three of his standard looking henchmen formed a ring around Kim who re-centered her battle posture. Each of the henchmen pressed a button on their belt. With a terrifying grumble, each man's muscles swelled and they grew several feet larger with veins popping out of their bulging arms and legs.

"Had them equipped wizsh growth hormone juzt for you, Kim Possible!" Dementor said with another cackle.

Ron had paused his sprint to the table of world leaders and took in the now larger henches.

"Man, he's really got his bases covered on this one," Ron said almost admiring Dementor's work.

"Ron, focus!" Kim barked as she leapt high into the air landing on a lunging henchman trying to grab her but coming up empty. Ron turned back to the table of world leaders but was suddenly cut off by Dementor.

"You haz zomething that belongz to me," Dementor spoke evilly. Ron, unable to stop his momentum, pivoted and spun in what looked like a good move.

"Sike!" Ron yelled too early as Dementor stuck out his leg tripping Ron to the floor. As he the hit ground, his feet tangled with Dementor's taking him down as well. The controller skipped ahead of them several feet.

Kim dodged crushing punches from henchmen. Each time they connected with an object it shattered. Kim was forced to slide under one henchman causing the other's punch to catch him square knocking him back towards Kim. Kim rolled out of the way only to narrowly miss being crunched under the foot of the third henchman. Kim spun her way back to feet and jumped out of the grasp of the henchman and landed on his head. Using the recoil of his body, she bounced onto the cat walk above. Surveying the room, she pushed off into a sprint and vaulted off the catwalk.

Dementor and Ron struggled against each other crawling towards the remote. Their hands reached the remote at the same time and knocked it further away. Dementor turned to Ron and tried to pin him to the ground so he could get up first, but before he could get the upper hand, Rufus landed on his helmet pushing it over his eyes.

"Thanks, buddy," Ron said elated. Quickly kicking Dementor off of him, he scrambled to his feet and scooped up the remote. But before he could get far, Ron slammed into a stack of crates piled much higher than they should have been knocking the remote backward to Dementor. With his helmet back off his eyes, Dementor grabbed the remote and started to run away. The crates still shook and wavered back and forth before the top one toppled down towards Ron who, with a terrified screech, rolled out of the way. The wooden crate burst apart as it hit the ground and hundreds of metal ball bearings raced outward across the floor catching Dementor who slipped and fell flat on his face once again releasing the remote.

Kim soared high over the villain's lair. As she reached the apex of her leap, she rolled and fired her grappling hook into the ceiling. The hooks caught the roof and as the rope pulled tight, Kim swung back towards the three henchmen who turned to face her just in time for her leg to connect square in the chest of the first sending him crashing back into the other two leaving all three sprawled on the floor out for the count. As Kim gracefully flipped into a landing, the remote slid to a rest at her feet.

Dementor pushed himself up in time to see the remote be picked up by Kim. His eyes quickly darted to the large screen as the download ticked from ninety-nine percent to one hundred. Dementor lurched to the controls and quickly pushed a series of buttons and ejected a small disk. The download was quickly replaced by a clock counter reading 1:00m. A booming female voice filled the room.

"Self-destruct sequence activated," reverberated through the lair.

"I'd love to shtay and witnessh you're doom, but I have a world to enzshlave!" Dementor maniacally yelled. He turned and opened a small round door in the cave wall and leaped into the tunnel it hid. The door slammed shut as the first seconds began to tick off the countdown.

Kim stopped at the front of the control panel as Rufus leaped onto her shoulder.

"Have to shut it down or we're toast," she exclaimed. "Rufus, can you jam the circuits?"

The naked mole rat gave a resounding "sure thing" before jumping on the panel. Opening a hatch, Rufus began to play with the exposed wires.

Ron reached the table of leaders. "Don't worry, we're going to get you out of here," Ron stated slightly panicked. He looked around each of the hostages and the surrounding area for some way of releasing them. "Okay, how do we get you out of here?" Ron said stumped.

"You could hit the button marked 'release' on the table," remarked the British leader dryly.

Ron looked down to see the 'RELEASE' button plainly marked in front of him miffed that he had missed it. "Hit the button marked 'release'," Ron mimicked as he pressed it down--the bars trapping the hostages pulled away and each quickly leaped out of their chairs.

Rufus continued to pull wires as Kim watched the countdown clock tick away. _Come on, Rufus, only forty-five seconds left. _Kim nervously thought. She watched as Rufus grabbed a wire and bite through it. Looking back up, Kim saw the counter switch a scant forty seconds to a whooping ten minutes.

"Good job, Rufus. You bought us some time," Kim praised. "Try to take it out all together."

Rufus, pleased with himself, took another wire and chomped down. Kim gazed at the counter and was horrified. The clock jumped from ten minutes back down to thirty seconds. Rufus managed to squeak an "uh-oh" before Kim grabbed the naked mole rat and made a break for it.

"Everybody out!" Kim yelled. "Head that way!" Kim directed Ron and the freed hostages to the path they had taken to get in. The world leaders scrambled ahead into the darkness with Kim and Ron right behind as the seconds ticked off the self-destruct mechanism. Every person felt like each step wasn't taking them away fast enough and they would be caught in the explosion. As the last few seconds fell off the timer, the leaders spilled out of the cave's entrance. The cave rumbled deep within as the first series of explosions pushed towards the surface. Kim and Ron had a few steps still to cover when the blast's concussion propelled them out the front and into a snow bank.

Smoke billowing from the mouth cave was the only thing that seemed to move on the snowy hillside. One by one, the freed hostages began to stir and stand or sit up. Bursting through the surface of the snow, Kim and Ron shook the powder off of themselves as the Kimunicator beeped.

"Go, Wade," Kim said.

"Kim, Ron, is everyone all right? Sensors detecting Dementor's lair blowing sky high!" Wade exclaimed with concern.

"Everyone's fine," Kim reassured. "But Dementor got away and now he has control over all the world's missile systems."

"I'll get to work trying to track him," Wade replied.

The British leader was still dusting himself off as he approached Kim and Ron. "On a scale of one to ten, I'd give that rescue a five," he groaned.

Ron looked up with a look of dissent. "Nah, more like a four point two," he shot back.

--

Kim laid flat on her back in her bed. Her pandaroo tucked under her arm. She stared long fully at the ceiling. As she recounted the day's events, a sick feeling came over her stomach. _Things are just too awckweird with Ron._ She shuddered. _This isn't how it's supposed to be!_

Kim's mom poked her head through the trap door. "Kimmie, you're awfully quiet. Is everything all right?" she asked concerned.

"I don't know," Kim said softly. "Dementor got away…"

Mrs. Dr. Possible climbed the last few steps and joined Kim on her bed as Kim sat up.

"Honey, I don't think this is about Dementor, is it?" the Possible matriarch stated gingerly. Kim attempted to look at her mother like she was crazy, but her defenses quickly faltered.

"It's just so totally different between me and Ron now. We just sit around and look at each other and wonder what we're suppose to do or say. It's so…, so awckeird." Kim let burst from her lips.

"Honey, that's normal," her mom tried to assure.

"Normal? No, normal is laughing and joking and, well, _talking," _Kim continued. "We've barely said ten words to each other save for on the mission. We just awkwardly hold hands and blank out. What's the point of being more than friends if you can't still act like friends?"

"Kim, you and Ron have a lot of new feelings to adjust to. It can't happen over night," Kim's mom said as she wrapped her arm around her daughter. "Just think about all the things you two have been through together and overcome. This is just another 'mission.' You'll be laughing and talking again in no time and you'll have an even stronger bond than before."

"Really? You think?" Kim asked helplessly.

"I don't think. I know," her mom said giving her daughter a squeeze.

Kim leaned her head to her mom's shoulder. "Thanks, mom."

--

Ron leaned against the pail wall--a confused and tense look on his face.

"K.P. and I have always been so cool around each other," Ron said as Rufus jumped onto his shoulder frantically trying to get his attention, but Ron continued. "But like suddenly we're in new territory and my styles all cramped up. I don't want to loose everything because I can't be myself around her," Ron said as Rufus finally grabbed Ron's eyelids and jerked them down.

Below him on a weight lifting bench, Mr. Barkin struggled with a set off weights that had pinned him to his back. Ron scrambled to offer him assistance and the two got the heavy bar back on the rack.

"Stoppable," Mr. Barkin gasped. "I don't' know how you keep getting into my house or why you keep coming to me for advice, but why don't you try talking to her."

"Talk to her? I just said that was the problem!" Ron said exasperated.

"About your feelings...," Mr. Barkin replied annoyed.

"Oh, those things," Ron said as he realized what his teacher had meant.

"Now, you can get over to her house and level with her, or you can spar a couple rounds with me," Mr. Barkin stated as he leaned towards Ron patting his fist into his open hand.

"Later, Mr. B.," Ron blurted as he shot out of the room. Mr. Barkin chuckled to himself and turned to his punching bag.

"You're about to enter the house of pain!" he grizzled.

--

Ron stood on the ladder to Kim's room just below the opening. _Okay, Ronald, you can do this._ He reassured himself. With a deep breath, he poked his head up into her room. Kim caught him out of the corner of her eye.

"Hey, Ron," she tried to greet him with enthusiasm, but it still came out scared.

"Hey, K.P.," Ron returned nervously. "Uh,..., can we talk?"

"Yeah, we kinda of need too," Kim replied. Both read the other's nervousness as a bad sign as Ron stepped up into Kim's room.

"K.P., the last coupl...," Ron started but was cutoff.

_Beep-beep. Ba-beep, _the Kimunicator interrupted. Ron stopped to look at Kim who didn't answer it.

"Probably about Dementor," Ron stated flatly.

"Yeah, should probably answer it," Kim replied as she took the Kimunicator out and flipped it on. "Go, Wade."

"Kim, Dementor's talking over the air waves. Look," Wade said, pushing a couple buttons. His image was quickly replaced by an uncomfortably close shot of Professor Dementor.

"Unlezh zhe world shurenderz to me, I will target and deztroy one world capital an hour," Dementor snarled.

"I've traced the signal to Dr. Drakken's lair," Wade said as his image popped back on the screen. "Apparently, he's lair-sitting for him. Global Justice is already in route to pick you up."

"Thanks, Wade," Kim said as the transmission ended. She turned to Ron. "Well, duty calls."

"Right there with you, K.P.," Ron said. The pair looked somewhat relieved that the conversation had been put on hold, but were also somewhat disappointed.

* * *

The Global Justice turbo jet skimmed feet above the water in the near pitch darkness approaching its target.

--

Kim and Ron stood in the cargo bay putting on scuba gear and checking themselves over. Kim held the Kimunicator.

"I've got the stealth bracelets working again, but try not to push them too hard," Wade said over the device. "Dementor closed the network with the missile codes so I can't hack in and changed the targeting coordinates. One of you will have to do it manually."

"Check, Wade," Kim stated. "Ron, when we get in there, you'll need to find the control panel and change the targeting coordinates like Wade said. I'll take out Dementor's henchmen before they have a chance to move."

"They'll never see it coming," Ron said with a smile holding up the sporty new gadget on his wrist.

"Well, that's the whole point, Ron," Kim replied dryly.

Kim and Ron each put their regulators in their mouths as Kim flipped on 'okay' sign to the pilot who responded in kind. The bomb bay doors swung open and the two plunged into the ocean below.

Once in the water, the two made their way to the island rock where Dementor had set up.

--

Creeping in the top entrance and onto the catwalk, Kim and Ron peered down into the massive control room. Dementor stood in front of the monitor displayed a map of the world with bull's eyes on each of the world's major capitals. Kim pointed the targeting control panel to Ron. With a nod, each hit their stealth bracelets and vanished -- their stealthy outlines moving towards their objectives.

Kim dropped down onto an unsuspecting henchman who dropped to the floor with a thud. Kim paused to look around and see if anyone else had noticed. Confident she wasn't heard, she moved on.

Ron dropped down to the targeting control panel that sat in a dark lonely part of the room. Ron looked the unit over and discovered that it was not user friendly. Hundreds of knobs were dialed to hundreds of targets. _This is going to take too long_. Ron thought. Then he noticed one larger knob at the end of the panel marked 'Master Target'. Ron reached for it and spun it around letting it randomly stop. He was delighted as the hundreds of coordinates all reset themselves to the one the master knob has selected. _All right, let's have some fun._ Ron slyly thought as he reached for the master knob and selected a new target.

On the screen, Doctor Director, surrounded by the world's leaders, appeared.

"Zho, are you ready to accept my termz?" Dementor stated confident.

Doctor Director looked pained. _Why hasn't Team Possible broken through yet?_ She thought anxiously. She had to stall.

"We are going to do everything in our power to stop you, Dementor," Doctor Director replied confidently.

"I thought you mighz zay zhomething like that. What city zhould go boom first? Tokyo? London? Zydney?" Dementor teased with his finger dangling over each city's launch button. "No, wait. I haven't gone to Zydney yet. Tokyo it is!" Dementor declared moving his finger to the button.

"Stop right there, Dementor," Kim called as she and Ron materialized out of stealth mode.

Dementor spun around and eyed the two teens angrily.

"Again with zhe interupzions. New plan!" Dementor shrieked. He angrily slammed his fist into a much larger button marked 'Launch All.' "I have juzted launched all zhe mizzles! You'll never shtop zhem all!" Dementor roared as he began his maniacal super villain laugh.

"Jokes on you!" Ron exclaimed stepping forward proudly. "I reprogrammed all the missiles."

Dementor stopped his evil laugh and a wave of panic washed over him. He turned to his computer and punched up the missile tracking display and was horrified to watch the path of each missile begin to direct itself to their location.

"You bafoon!" Dementor cried. "You targeted US!"

"How do you like that?" Ron taunted. Almost as soon as he had finished, a booming female voice filled the air.

"Missile impact in two minutes," the computer said coldly.

Kim wanted to be mad at yet another ill advised plan carried out by Ron, but as she watched Ron's cocky grin fade to confusion and then realization as to what he had done, Kim could only smirk. _Normal._ She thought calmly. _Yep, everything is just normal..._ Snapping to, Kim's eyes darted to Dementor as he ran up the platform to make it to his getaway pod on the roof.

"Let's go!" Kim shouted as she grabbed Ron's hand and pulled him after Dementor.

--

As the two burst through the hatch on the roof, the first missile impacted the side of the lair. Kim and Ron ran directly after Dementor who was almost to his hover jet. Suddenly another missile slammed into the roof between the two teens and Dementor forcing them to stop and cover as debris went flying.

Kim reassessed the situation and eyed the swooping Global Justice jet lowering a ladder to pluck them off the roof. Kim and Ron sprinted but were forced to dodge another missile as it impacted between them and their goal. Kim pivoted and leaped for the ladder and grasped as the jet suddenly jerked to miss a missile. The ladder swung away just as Ron tried to grab it and left him alone with Rufus on the roof.

Kim pulled out her grappling gun and fired at the roof. The hooks latched and Kim used her weight to swing the ladder back to Ron who immediately grabbed on and secured himself. As Kim retracted the gun and the Global Justice began to circle to leave, Kim watched as a missile slammed into Professor Dementor's jet forcing him to pull up. Kim pointed the grappling gun and lined up a shot and fired. The hooks connected right on with Dementor's helmet with a clang.

"Wha...?" was all he could manage as the Global Justice jet applied full power pulling the rope Kim held him with tight--his squeezed head fitting in his helmet ensured that he got yanked from the roof. As the jet rocketed to safety, missile after missile slammed into the complex as a massive explosion rumbled into the sky. Professor Dementor dangled from the bottom of the rope arms folded watching.

"Dr. Drakken iz never going to let me live zhis down," he sighed.

--

Monday morning had greeted Middleton with a beautiful sky and pleasant warmness. Students were bustling into Middleton High excited that the year was almost over and talking about that weekend's prom and all that had happened. A few noticed and stared as Kim Possible and Ron Stoppable approached from their usual path.

Their hands held tightly, both still looked uncomfortable. Ron kept trying to will himself to talk to Kim before they got into the school. As they were about to cross onto to school property, Kim pulled up forcing Ron to take and extra step. He turned and faced her.

"Ron, we still need to talk," Kim said with a slightly fearful look in her eye.

"Uh, yeah, right," Ron nervously returned. Kim looked at him and their eyes locked for a silent moment.

"Listen, we need to still be friends," Kim said. The words hit Ron like a ton of bricks. Kim panicked realizing she may easily be misinterpreted. "I don't mean _just_ friends," she said leaning towards Ron who now looked a little better. "But we still have to _be _friends. Our friendship is everything. It's what makes us who we are together. We shouldn't have to change anything. We're only adding to it...making it stronger," Kim closed what little distance was left between herself and Ron. Her eyes looked for reciprocation in Ron's as a she tried to smile.

"It's just kind of funny to get use to, K.P.," Ron said trailing off.

"But we'll make it through this sitch. We always do," Kim said

as she pushed just enough to place her lips onto Ron's in a gentle but warm kiss. Ron pushed back a little as if to say, 'You're right.'

The two reluctantly broke and gazed into each other's eyes.

"Come on, let's go," Kim said.

Kim and Ron entered the school grounds hand in hand with no room between them.

"Did you get the answer to number six on the math homework?" Kim inquired.

Ron nervously chuckled. _Knew you were forgetting something, Stoppable._ He thought. "Well, um, I sorta didn't get the answer to any of them," he said. Kim looked at him a bit disappointed.

"Forgot to do your homework again?" she prodded.

"We spent an entire weekend on a mission!" he objected.

"But _I_ got _my _homework done," Kim retorted.

"Oh, good, can I look at it?" Ron asked politely.

"Ron...," Kim responded sharply.

"Hey, I'd let you look at mine," he said hurt that she did not answer with an obligatory yes.

"It wouldn't do me any good. It's blank," Kim jabbed.

"Low blow, K.P.," Ron muttered as Kim broke their hands and took a couple steps ahead. "Hey, where are you going?"

"If you want a peek at my homework, you're going to have to earn it," Kim said playfully before bouncing ahead to the front doors.

Ron paused for a moment. A small smile slowly widened. As he started chasing after Kim, all he could think was: _Normal. Everything is just normal...and better._

* * *

"Have a muy bueno day!" the squeaky-voiced manager said as he slid the tray of food over the counter.

Bonnie Rockwaller barely acknowledged Ned as she quickly grabbed her order and evacuated the area. The weekend had not gone very well for the self-appointed social queen of Middleton High. Possible had showed her up not once but _twice_ at the prom. First with that syntho-hottie Eric, then with that loser sidekick of hers. To make matters worse, everyone cheered the new couple making her look like…, well, bad. Topping it all though was her 'off' status with Brick Flag (again!). The only thing the brunette had to look forward to was indulging in her favorite non-healthy food. She'd never admit it publicly, but Stoppable's 'naco' was something she couldn't get enough of.

Bonnie took her normal booth with a sigh. Had things gotten so rotten that eating fast food was the highlight of her day? _Oh, well, it could be worse_, the cheerleader thought. As she looked down to forget her troubles in a greasy deep fried meal, she found out that it was…

"Excuse me!" Bonnie seethed as she slammed her tray onto the counter. "Is this some sort of a joke?"

Ned quickly recalled his customer recovery training as he cautiously attended to the irate young woman. Glancing down at the tray he had just served her, he found nothing but crumbs and empty wrappers.

"I, uh," was all he could manage before the girl cut him off.

"I want this fixed, like, now!" she demanded.

"Uh, I'm sorry! I'll get right on it," Ned said flabbergasted at how such a thing could occur. He quickly grabbed replacement items that had been meant for other customers and placed them on a new tray. With a whirl, he handed the new tray to Bonnie.

"It's about time," she scolded before he could offer any further apology. The cheerleader stormed back to her booth as thoughts of raising heck to Bueno Nacho's customer service department swirled through her head. For the second time in as many minutes, Bonnie sat down to go about her lunch and once again…

"RRRRRaaaaaahhhh!"

Kim watched as her chief rival unleashed a verbal tirade on the poor Bueno Nacho assistant manager. Bonnie may have been prone to the drama, but it was obvious she was venting much more than a messed up order. Finally, the brunette marched herself towards the exit shooting Kim an icy glance before sticking her nose in the air and exploding out the front door.

As Kim continued to stare, she noticed an unusual vibration coming from the table. The redhead glanced down just in time to see a bloated naked mole rat materialize out of thin air. With a satisfied belch, Rufus tossed the stealth bracelet off to the side. Kim couldn't help but smile as she quickly figured out what had been going on. She picked up the squishy pink blob and patted it on the head.

"Good little naked mole rat," she cooed.


	3. No Bueno

Thanks to qtpie235, cpneb, CajunBear73, conan98002, Stand Alone Battle A.I., Magnatron, Akinyi, Randy C, Molloy, and RonHeartbreaker for reading and reviewing.

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation._

* * *

_Episode 2: No Bueno_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

The first signs of summer were in the air. The afternoon sky was pail and bleached rather than blue. A hot wind moved around but provided no relief. Heat waves shimmered over a large sombrero shaped building as a young man on a blue scooter pulled into the drive-thru.

…_Rufus and Ron Stoppable. With our…,_ Ron trailed off in his head as he drove toward the Bueno Nacho drive-thru. He gave pause over the next line and realized that it had to be changed. With a grin he continued with his _American Starmaker_ breakout performance. …_with my _girlfriend_ Kim Possible…_ _We're not afraid of any attack. I said, 'Yo, K. P., I got your back'. _He could not stop grinning as he came to a stop at the speaker.

"Gotta do take-out today, Ned. I'll need K.P.'s and my usual," Ron said cheerfully. Without waiting for anyone to respond, he twisted the throttle on his scooter and pulled around to the window.

His typical care free smile filled his face as he extended his hand with a wad of dollar bills. Expecting to have the money taken from him, Ron's head snapped as his hand impacted the glass of the unopened window.

Ron stared through the darkened glass as the blood drained from his face. The money in hand dropped and floated to the ground below. Rufus popped his head out of Ron's pocket and was surprised to find no bag of food for him to jump in and inspect. He looked up at his friend and noticed his vacant sick face. Rufus jumped to his shoulder and waved his paw in front of Ron's face unable to stir him. He tapped his foot in thought before looking in the direction Ron had locked his eyes. The naked mole rat's jaw almost dropped off his face as he let out a terrible shriek.

* * *

Sweat pored across Kim's forehead as she turned the last corner to Bueno Nacho. _This had better be good_, she thought angrily. Kim and Ron had skipped their normal post-school chow session at Bueno Nacho to dive into homework, but Ron still insisted on getting food and Kim reluctantly agreed to let him grab some take-out.

As Kim spotted Ron sitting on his scooter parked in the Bueno Nacho drive-thru, she raised a suspicious eyebrow. She continued up the path and approached her spaced out boyfriend.

"Ron," Kim said soothingly. "What's going on?"

Ron stared straight ahead emoting nothing that acknowledged Kim's presence. Kim waved her hand in front of his face. With no response, she snapped her fingers next to his ear—again, nothing.

"Ronald!" she yelled to no avail.

Arms crossed, Kim's lip pouted out as she began to get frustrated. She noticed Rufus frozen on Ron's shoulder, his jaw still agape. Kim extended her finger and poked the small pink rodent. He didn't budge. _Well, this is a 8.7 on the weird-o-meter,_ Kim thought before the darkened windows of Bueno Nacho caught her eye. She turned and stepped forward to read a flyer posted on the window.

_Dear Bueno Nacho Customers,_

_Due to damage awards against the Bueno Nacho Corporation in the aftermath of the 'lil Diablo promotion, we are saddened to announce that Bueno Nacho must close its doors. Thank you for your loyalty over the years, but it is time to say 'Buenos Noches'._

"Oh, boy…," Kim groaned aloud. She looked at Ron with a little more sympathy. Sighing heavily, she pulled the Kimunicator from her pocket and punched up Wade.

"Go Kim," Wade greeted on the screen.

"Wade, I've got a bit of a sitch," Kim replied. "Ron's stuck in a trance because Bueno Nacho closed down." She kept her eyes glued to Ron as she waited for Wade to respond, but only silence followed. She glanced down at Wade.

His hand was frozen above his keyboard. His right eye was twitched. A look of befuddled confusion covered his face as his lips quivered.

"…Bueno Nacho…closed…down…?" was all he could stammer.

"Oh, not you, too!" Kim sighed. She ended the transmission and pocketed the Kimunicator. She folded her arms and looked over Ron. With a grumble, she grabbed the spare helmet off the back of his scooter.

--

Ron was seated on the Possible's couch—the blank stare still firmly set. Kim stood next to him with a look of concern. Her mother was shining a light in his eyes observing them dilate.

"Well, it looks to me like he's in shock," Mrs. Dr. Possible stated professionally. "You found him just like this?"

"Looks like a case of kooties to me," Jim said sarcastically from behind. Kim flashed looks of scorn to each of her twin brothers as Mrs. Dr. Possible continued her examination.

"Told ya' Kim was giving him kooties last night," Tim stated matter of factly.

A scarlet streak matching her hair ran across Kim's face. Eyes widening, she screamed, "TWEEBS!"

The two boys darted out of site snickering. Kim, still huffing, caught her mom's inquisitive stare. All she could do was put up a defensive smile as her mom smirked and rolled her eyes.

Mrs. Dr. Possible turned back to Ron as she placed her hand to her chin looking like she was deep in thought.

"I think we're going to have to operate," she stated seriously. "Maybe even a full brain transplant. Gonna be a lot of blood."

_Brain transplant? Blood?_ Ron's mind thought as it finally snapped out of its loop. He leaped to his feet almost knocking Mrs. Dr. Possible off the couch and forcing Kim to scramble out of his way.

"There will be no blood of mine…" Ron declared.

"Okay, okay," Kim's mom said cutting him off. "I may only have twenty years experience as a brain surgeon, but I'll let you get a second opinion." She stood, patted Ron on the head and walk out of the room.

Ron, nearly hyperventilating, slumped back down on the couch.

"This is the worst day of my life," he said almost crying.

Kim sat down next to him and delicately took his hand. She looked at him trying to sympathize with him in her eyes.

"Ron, I'm just as upset that Bueno Nacho is closed," Kim said softly. _That's a lie, Possible! He's never going to believe that._ She scoffed to herself. "But we'll find someplace new…"

Ron pulled back from her nearly indignant.

"Someplace new? Someplace _new?_" he growled. "I'd rather starve to death, K.P. You can't replace something as special as Bueno Nacho. The memories we had there-together, the naco, the bendy straws." Ron slumped again as Kim gave him a tender rub on his back.

_Beep-beep; ba-beep, _came the Kimunicator.

"Whatcha' got for us, Wade," Kim said as she pulled the device out.

"Break in," said Wade melancholy. "A silent alarm went off at Jack Stanton's house."

"The billionaire businessman?" Kim asked.

"Yeah," Wade said still saddened. "His mansion in Upperton contains some of the world's rarest pieces of art."

"We're on it," Kim stated dutifully. She stood up and began to march away. "Let's go, Ron."

"I don't feel like it," Ron pouted without moving. Kim turned back to him.

"Ron," Kim barked. She almost began to order him to move, but looking at him, she thought better of it. She leaned down to him and brought her face in front of his. She said softly, "I can't go without you," and gently kissed him on his nose.

Ron growled. Kim had been using this new tactic on him since prom. _This is worse than the puppy dog pout,_ he thought angrily. He stirred a bit.

"Fine, let's go," he said dry of enthusiasm.

Kim stood up and pulled Ron to his feet and began to lead him out of the room.

"At least you can get your mind off of Bueno Nacho for awhile," Kim said still trying to console him.

--

Dusk was settling over the town of Upperton as Kim and Ron waived good-bye to their ride. The two teens stood in front of the marble-faced mansion. A cable van was parked out front.

Kim peered inside and saw several paintings and various other trinkets of value.

"I got the feeling that someone's not getting five hundred channels hooked up anytime soon," she quipped. Ron stood arms folded with a scowl. He leaned to look into the van for himself, but only as a formality.

Kim pulled out the Kimunicator.

"Got a way in, Wade?" Kim asked.

"I hacked into the security system and deactivated the side door," Wade replied his head resting in his hand and his eyes looking sadly at his computer. "You'll be able to get in without alerting the perps. Also, looks like their trying to open the vault in the basement."

--

Kim and Ron quietly moved down the grand hallway as night plunged the mansion into darkness. Blank spaces on the wall indicated where priceless painting used to hang. Along the length of the hall and down the stairs, a heavy set of cables twisted along the floor. Kim leaned down and touched them.

"I'm betting they've got some heavy duty equipment down there," Kim said focused. Ron still had his arms crossed and only gave a glance at Kim's observation.

The pair crept farther along the hall and then down to the basement. At the base of the stairs, they paused looking at two men dressed in standard burglar clothes. One was carrying two small, jeweled necklaces; the other held a golden figurine. A laser drill sat on a stand next to them. One of the men tripped as he crouched through the hole cut through the vault door. The other moved to support him both almost loosing the objects they were carrying.

"Careful, we can't afford to lose any of these pieces," the larger of the two exclaimed.

"Well, you obviously can't afford the purchase them," Kim said sternly stepping out of the shadows. Ron leaned against the wall with his hands in his pockets still looking forlorned.

"So put down the goods and surrender and no one gets hurt, blah, blah, blah. Can we get this over with?" Ron remarked annoyed.

The two thieves looked nervously at each other then back at Kim. The smaller one spoke up.

"Aren't you that cheerleader who saves the world and her friend who's always, well, messing up?" he said.

"Hey! Ron's saved the world…by himself…more than once…," Kim said defensively. She glanced over to Ron to see if she had maybe bolstered his spirits but remained locked in angst. She was surprised when Ron stepped forward and walked past her.

"Look, today, has been a rotten day," Ron sneered marching directly towards the two men. "There was no hot water when I took a shower this morning, my soufflé fell apart in home ec, and my favorite restaurant closed down!"

As Ron continued his ranting march towards him, the larger of the two thieves suddenly thought, _Wait, these are just teenagers!_ _A couple hormone-crazed kids are not taking me out!_ Dropping the relic he was holding, he grabbed the laser and, pushing the power to full blast, aimed it at Ron.

"…And another thing," Ron continued but before he could finish a red blast came roaring at his head.

* * *

Ron ducked just in the nick of time as a hot beam of light that could cut him in two zinged over his head.

"K.P., he's firing the laser…at us!" Ron screamed in his normally panicked mission voice.

_You had me for a second there, Ron._ Kim thought with a smirk as she did a backflip to avoid the swinging laser's beam. Out of the corner of her eye, she caught the smaller of the two crooks making a break for the stairs. Beside her was a hooked chain the pair had used to pull the slab of the vault door out with. She grabbed it and twirled around her head slinging it at the escaping thief. The chain twisted itself around the man and tripped him to a stop at the base of the stairs.

Rufus had jumped out of Ron's pocket as he avoided the first laser blast and sprinted along the ground towards the large crook at the laser. Wasting no time, the naked mole rat bit as hard as he could through the man's shoe. With a yelp of pain, the man released the still active laser and jumped back. The beam shot towards the ceiling spinning quickly and cut a circle out of the floor above. The weakened beams groaned and creaked before finally giving way.

Kim and Ron found themselves below the collapsing chunk of housing. Kim gracefully wheeled out of danger while Ron coiled and leaped towards the vault door and into the other thief, who was still jumping around in pain holding his foot, knocking the man into the wall and out of commission.

The laser was now spinning and firing at will. Kim ran towards it as it inadvertently fired at her forcing her to take evasive maneuvers. She pressed on and slid under the machine grabbing its power cables and ripping them out. The laser powered down with a hum.

Ron sat up on top of the unconscious robber, looked around and then below him.

"Looks like I got this one, sorta," Ron said with a small bit of satisfaction as Kim came to help him up.

--

The flashing lights of the police cars illuminated the peaceful upscale neighborhood. Kim stood with a plain-clothes officer who appeared to be taking her statement. Ron leaned against the police van still looking sad as the two robbers were placed in the back.

"We want to thank you again, Miss Possible; Mr. Stoppable," the officer said. "We'll be sure to mention your heroics to Mr. Stanton when he returns from his vacation."

"It was no big," Kim said in her usual modest tone. "Just glad we could help."

The officer nodded his head and walked away. Kim turned and noticed Ron still pouting. _Rush into battle against all sorts of low-lifes and villains with me and your spirit is crushed by a restaurant closing,_ she thought. _What am I going to do with you, Ron?_

--

_Itchy, itchy, itchy,_ was all Ron could think as the blindfold covered his eyes. He desperately wanted to rub but Kim had both of his hands pulling him. He could feel the cold air cool his skin as they entered a building from off the street.

"Okay, we're here," Kim said excited as she dropped his hands. He whipped the blindfold off and looked around. The layout was similar to Bueno Nacho—soda machine, booths, cheap tiling. But the colors were wrong and the smell was of burgers.

"Cow'n'Chow?" Ron asked putting it all together.

"Ron, humor me," Kim said grabbing his hand and leading him to the cash register.

"Welcome to Cow'n'Chow where we've got the cow, you eat the chow!" the cashier said. "What can we get for you?"

"I'll have the cowgirl combo with a strawberry shake. And could I get a salad instead of fries?" Kim said politely.

The attendant punched a few buttons and turned to Ron.

"For you, sir?" he inquired.

Ron gazed at the menu one arm tucked; the other running up to his face. His eyes shifted back and forth to all the various items. He hadn't been forced to make a decision in a fast food restaurant in quite sometime.

"He'll have what I'm having," Kim said impatiently. Slapping the payment on the counter, she took him to get their food before leading him to a booth.

"See, just like normal," Kim said trying to gauge Ron's feelings. Ron just sighed and looked at his food. Rufus stood on the cautiously sniffing the unfamiliar items in front of him.

"Yeah, like normal," Ron lied.

_Uh-oh, Kim, you're losing him._ Kim thought. _Desperate times… _She motioned at someone in the front of the restaurant.

As Ron took the first nibble out of his burger, a man dressed in a black and white cow suit complete with floppy tongue and cowbell arrived at their booth. He wasted no time plopping cheap plastic cowboy hats on each of their heads with a thunderous chuckle.

"Congratulations!" he bellowed. "You're our Cow'n'Chow Cow Pokes of the Day!"

A freckle-faced employee with a camera jumped out from behind the man in the cow costume and yelled, "Say Cow'n'Chow!"

Kim and Rufus shouted "Cow'n'Chow!" with enthusiasm as Ron sat unimpressed. The camera flashed. As the two employees walked away, Kim gave Ron a nervous smile.

"How about that?" Kim said. "We're making new memories already!"

Ron picked up his milk shake and pointed to the straw.

"No bendy straw," he said miffed.

"Ron," Kim said as she crossed her arms and frowned. "I'm trying to do something nice for you..."

Ron eyes connected with Kim and he suddenly saw that she was hurt. He softened his scowl.

"I'm sorry, K.P.," he said. "Maybe it's too soon for me to move on. Bueno Nacho was a part of my soul. Woven into the fabric of my being-like you, Kim," Ron shuddered.

Kim looked at Ron with empathy and getting up from her side, moved over to his side of the booth. She planted her head on his shoulder and wrapped her arms around him.

"Ron, I know how sentimental you are," she said soothingly. "I'll be right here for you. Whenever you need to take a walk down Bueno Nacho memory lane, you know the drill. But I can only do so much. Eventually, you're gonna have to help yourself."

Kim gave Ron a squeeze and she felt some of the burden leave his shoulders. Ron could feel some of the hurt flow out of him and into the air as he closed his eyes. No sooner than they were shut than a bolt flashed in front of him. His eyes popped open wide as the physical manifestation of an epiphany spread across his face.

--

Students bustled down the halls of Middleton High shuffling books and slamming lockers. Kim spotted Monique exchanging her last class's books for the next.

"Hey, Monique," Kim greeted uncheerfully as Monique closed her locker and the two started walking.

"Hey, girl. What's eating you?" Monique asked.

"Funny choice of words," Kim replied. "I can't find Ron. He wasn't in class and he's been so shattered since Bueno Nacho closed. It's like his heart is broken"

"Well, you know what they say about the path to a man's heart," Monique quipped.

"He just makes it so hard to reach out to him when he's like this," Kim said as they turned the corner to her locker. The two girls stopped as they saw Ron standing with Kim's locker open hearing the faint murmur of Wade's voice before Ron whispered back.

Ron, noticing he was being watched, quickly whispered something more to Wade and slammed the locker shut. Kim and Monique walked up to him.

"Ladies," he said in a low tone. His face looked deathly serious and he was holding his hands locked together in front of him.

"Ron, what are you and Wade up to?" Kim asked suspiciously.

"I can't tell you, K.P.," Ron said as if it the secret was life or death. "You will find out in the due course of time." With that, he turned and walked away leaving Kim and Monique with raised eyebrows.

"You know, if it were anybody else, I'd say that he's not acting normal," Monique stated.

"But knowing Ron…?" Kim sighed. "Par for the course."

--

Kim walked up the driveway of the Stoppable home still in her cheerleading uniform. Ron hadn't shown up for practice either. Her concern for Ron grew as she cut practice early and jetted out of the gym.

Noticing a large number of cars parked on his street and the front door open, her concern was turning into confusion. She took the last couple steps to the door and entered. What she saw stopped her cold in her tracks.

"Oh no!" she gasped. She looked at the Stoppable's living room which had all its furniture cleared. There were folding tables stacked with phones. A sign hung on the wall read: _Save Bueno Nacho Telethon._ Men and women of all ages sat at many of the phones. Ron stood by a camera sitting in an empty section of the room. He was checking a list on a clipboard while speaking into a headset.

"Oh, please, no!" Kim said again as Ron noticed her standing in the doorway.

"K.P.!" Ron shouted as he rushed over to her and started pushing her to an open phone. "Glad you're here. Not a lot of time. We need you on phone three. It's our anchor phone. We need a credible face 'cause you'll be seen on camera."

Kim was forced into the chair as Ron put her phone down in front of her.

"Ron..," she tried to interject.

"Here's your script and your call log. We'll take any amount, even five dollars, but remind them if they donate twenty-five dollars they get the bobble head and for fifty, they get the tote bag," Ron said holding one of each in his hands.

"You're holding a telethon…to save Bueno Nacho…in your living room?" Kim asked in disbelief. "Did you even ask your parent's permission?"

Ron's cheery face suddenly went to panic as he smacked himself on the head.

"I knew I was forgetting something," he said. "Oh, well. Five minutes to show time people!"

The Kimunicator chimed as Kim pulled it out.

"Wade, please tell me you have nothing to do with all this," Kim stated with narrowed eyes. Wade cowered away from the screen a bit.

"Well, um…, can you put Ron on?" Wade replied.

With a growl, Kim handed the device to Ron.

"Ready on your end, buddy?" Ron asked hopefully.

"Just hook the camera into the Kimunicator so I can stream the video," Wade said. Ron did as instructed and stood before the camera. The Kimunicator rested on top of the camera with Wade directing on the screen.

"Just gotta reroute the network signals… and you're on!" Wade said as he pointed to Ron.

"Boo-yah!" Ron shouted. "The Save Bueno Nacho Telethon is on the air!"

* * *

Kim slammed her head into the table. Ron was in front of the camera composing himself ready to speak to the nation.

"People, I come to you today not as a citizen, but as a _concerned _citizen. A great institution has been tossed in the trash pile and we cannot let it stand!" Ron said in his most dignified of voices.

--

In the break room at the Middleton Space Center, several men had gathered around the television watching Ron's telethon. Mr. Dr. Possible stared in shock as Ron continued over the speakers.

"…Nothing says America like 'Bueno Nacho.'" Ron said moving his hands dramatically. "If you can't eat a freshly prepared naco or chimerito, then I don't want to live here. What will they come for next? Puppies?! They're going to take away your puppies!!"

--

In a nice looking living room, a child was hunched over her fluffy white puppy dog sobbing loudly. Her mother sat on the couch consoling her.

"Sweetie," she said. "They're not really going to take your puppy."

--

"…Yes, you'll get your tote bag in one to two weeks," Kim said dryly into the phone. "Thank you for your contribution." Kim slammed the phone down and glanced over at Ron.

In front of the camera, Ron stood at a table with her cousin, Larry. A collection of cups with animated graphics printed on them was spread out in front of them. Larry pointed at one.

"And on this one the caption says it's from the epic Battle for Mirander," Larry said in monotone. "But if you look closely, you can see the Federal Forces are clearly being engaged by the Zolkans—a race that wasn't introduced to the 'Space Mutant' trilogy until after the Battle. I drove three hours to the only Bueno Nacho handing the wrong cups out to get it."

Ron's eyes were wide sparkling as he stared at the cup. He nervously wet his lips.

"Can I touch it?" he asked in a whisper.

"Only if you put these on," Larry said handing Ron a pair of gloves. Ron quickly put them on and delicately picked up the cup.

"Wow," he whispered, as his eyes became almost as large as his face. With a flash, he dropped the cup and rushed the camera. Larry dove to save the cup and caught it before it hit the floor only to gasp as he realized he was touching it with his bare hands. He fumbled to set it on the table.

Ron got directly into the camera's lens and held it with both hands.

"If Bueno Nacho fades away, where will you get cups like this?" Ron pleaded. "What will you drink out of? What will the children drink out of!? If you don't do it for yourself, do it for the kids!"

Listening to every word, Kim began to bang her head on the table again when she noticed a familiar voice next to her.

"…No, thank you! Buh-bye!" a cheerful Monique said as she set down the phone. Kim looked up in disbelief to see her friend manning the phones.

"Monique?" Kim asked shocked. "How long have you been here? I didn't know you cared about Bueno Nacho so much."

"I don't," Monique said with a sly smile. "I just wanted a front row seat. Ron's so entertaining when he goes off on a tangent like this."

Kim scowled but playfully pinched Monique's arm.

--

Night had fallen outside the Stoppable house as a long black limousine pulled in front and stopped. The driver hopped out of the car and sprinted around to the passenger door and opened it up. A man dressed in an expensive suit stepped out and surveyed his surroundings. He appeared distinguished and refined as he made his way up the path to the front door.

--

Jim and Tim stood each with a flask of bubbling liquids. On top of a burner sat another flask.

"To begin the reaction, you first pour the hydroxolin," Jim said as he poured his flask into the empty container.

"You have to time it right before you add the monozyllm or," Tim said as he began to pour his flask out. The two chemicals suddenly flashed bright as they touched. A large explosion shuddered the room. Jim and Tim were knocked back to the floor as smoke filled the air. They sat up with singed hair and black markings on their faces coughing.

Ron stepped into the smoke trying to clear it out. He nervously laughed.

"Well, it was a nice try guys. Better luck next time," he said playing off the disaster. "I see it's the top of the hour. Time to check with the Wadester to see how we're doing. Wade?"

"You people are terrific!" Wade exclaimed. He hit a couple buttons and a graphic popped up on the screen showing the amount of money collected. "After only three hours, we're already a third of the way to our goal!"

The phone in front of Kim rang causing her to moan. She unhappily picked it up.

"Thank you for calling the Save Bueno Nacho Telethon," she said with a grumble. "How can I help you?"

"Um, yeah, can I order two veggie nacos and a chimerito?" came a disoriented voice on the other end.

Kim rolled her eyes. "This is not a take out number," she barked as she slammed the receiver to the body of the phone. Kim gritted her teeth a bit as a shadow fell over her. Kim looked up at its source.

"Kim Possible, I presume," said the well-dressed and dignified man.

"That's me," Kim replied.

"Jack Stanton," the man said extending his hand.

Kim immediately perked up and leaped over the table to shake his hand.

"Glad to meet you sir. It's a real…," Kim said but was cutoff by Ron who now stood between them.

"Kim, this is no time for chit-chat. We need you on that phone," Ron said sternly.

"Ron," Kim replied embarrassed. "This is Jack Stanton. We saved his house from being robbed."

Ron's face blushed a bit as he realized he had been a bit rude.

"Right on," he covered. "What can we do for you?"

"I just wanted to thank you both for protecting my collection," Jack said. "Many of the pieces have been in my family's vault for generations. Some can never be given a value."

"Well, if they don't have a value, why would anyone want to steal them?" Ron asked oblivious to Mr. Stanton's meaning.

He laughed thinking that Ron had made a joke. Kim laughed knowing that he had not.

"Anyway, I am in your debt," Jack said with a nod to Kim and Ron. "If there is anything I can do to repay you, let me know." Mr. Stanton turned to leave but paused and turned back to the two teens.

"May I ask what is going on here?" he asked.

"Well, apparently someone has separation issues since Bueno Nacho closed down so he's hosting a telethon to bring it back," Kim stated expecting Mr. Stanton to give a squeamish nod and leave. Instead, the billionaire dropped to his knees and clutched his chest.

"Bueno…Nacho…is…closed?!" He gasped. "Noooooo!"

Ron dropped to his side and put his arm around him.

"Let the pain out," Ron consoled. "It's the only way to heal."

"You've got to be kidding me," Kim muttered under her breath.

"Look on the bright side, Mr. S.," Ron continued. "With the money we raise, we're gonna try to pay off Bueno Nacho's debt."

Mr. Stanton turned to Ron as a thought rushed into his head. He picked himself up and brushed himself off. Reaching into his jacket, he pulled out a pen and a checkbook.

"I have a better idea," he said as he clicked the pen.

--

Kim and Ron were seated in their normal booth at Bueno Nacho. The place was sparkling-matching the expression on Ron's face. Ned dropped a tray of food in front of them. Mr. Stanton stood next to him.

"It was way cool of you to buy Bueno Nacho and reopen it, Mr. S.," Ron said as he gulped down his naco. Rufus held a piece of a naco in his paws-a tear streaming down his face. The naked mole rat slowly put it in his mouth and chewing delicately, fainted onto the table.

"Think nothing of it," Jack responded. "It was the least I could do. I have to thank you again. Without your help, Ron, I would never have gotten this place up and running so fast."

"Dream come true, Jacky-baby!" Ron exclaimed as took another chomp on his naco.

Kim sat almost idly by watching the two converse. She took in the sheer joy across Ron's face as he once again enjoyed his favorite of all foods. _Gotta admire him for his loyalties._ Kim thought with a loving smile. _God only knows what he'd do for me…_ Goosebumps shivered her spine as she turned to her salad.

"Before I go," Mr. Stanton started. "I want you two to have something." Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out two jewelry boxes and handed each one to Kim and Ron. Both set their food down and opened the boxes up.

Kim instantly recognized the necklace inside. It was one of the pieces the robbers had tried to steal. Kim looked to Ron's and found that it was the other.

Ron held his up. A strong gold band surrounded a shattered emerald. The outer band had an ancient inscription. Kim looked at hers. A series of broken rubies formed a ring around five larger pieces of ruby suspended in the middle of the piece.

"Legend has it that a family of ancient warriors drew their power from two shattered stones," Mr. Stanton said. "One ruby and one emerald. A woman of the family would give their loved one a piece of the emerald and take a piece of the ruby for herself. They would wear them while in battle to connect each to other in the afterlife should the warrior fall."

"This is too much, Mr. Stanton," Kim said modestly. "We can't accept these."

"Nonsense, it is only right that you two should have them," Jack retorted. "You put your lives in jeopardy too much to not have something like this."

Kim reluctantly put hers on and looked at Ron who had already done the same.

"It looks absolutely beautiful on you, Miss Possible," Jack said with a tender smile.

"Thank you. We'll always cherish them," Kim said.

"You two take care of each other," Jack said as he patted Rufus on the head and turned away.

Ron wasted no time in resuming his attack on his naco. Kim looked at him with a twinkle in her eye.

"You know, Ron," she started. "This was supposed to be an opportunity to learn how to deal with change."

"I learned plenty, Kim," Ron stated as he took another bite. "I learned that the more things change, the more they stay the same."

Kim flashed a bit of an annoyed look. _Touché, Stoppable._ Her mind grumbled.

"I've learned that change can't be a good thing," he continued.

A bit of a coy smile formed on Kim's face.

"I bet I can change your mind," she said leaning in to him.

"Oh, yeah, what could possibly change for the better?" Ron stated matter of factly ignorant of Kim's advance.

"I can think of one thing," Kim said hushed as she grabbed the back of Ron's neck and pushed his lips into hers.

Ron still held what remained of his naco in his hand, but as the kiss lingered, he dropped it. _Got me there, K.P._ He thought blissfully. With their eyes closed shut in the passion of their embrace, neither Kim nor Ron could see the jewels they wore around their necks begin to pulse with light and illuminate.

* * *

Mr. Stoppable fell back into his barcalounger as he let another day of number crunching fall by the wayside. Kicking off his loafers, he pulled the lever on the side of the chair and leaned back with a contented sigh. Just as he reached the maximum point of relaxation, he grabbed a copy of _Actuaries Weekly_ and thumbed open to the first page.

_Ring. Ring._

_Of course,_ he thought as he reached over to pick up the phone.

"Hello. Stoppable residence," he said politely.

"Um, yeah, I'd like to get the tote bag," said an equally polite female voice on the other end.

"Tote bag?" Mr. Stoppable began rather confused. "What are you talking about?"

"You know, for the Bueno Nacho telethon. For twenty-five dollars, you guys will send me a tote bag," came the reply.

"I'm sorry but I think you have the wrong number," said Ron's father as he hung up the phone rather quickly. He barely had the chance to glance back at his magazine before it rang again.

"Hello. Stoppable residence," he said a bit less politely than before.

"Yes, I'd like to make a hundred dollar donation for the nacho cheese dispenser," said a shrill male voice.

"Cheese dispenser?" Mr. Stoppable said as his befuddlement at the strange calls rose. "We don't have a cheese dispenser."

"But…"

"I'm afraid you've got the wrong number," he repeated before swinging the receiver to the phone back onto the hook. His hand hadn't even begun to lift away before the phone rang again.

"Stoppable residence," he said sharply.

"Do you guys still have the veggie naco, dude, 'cause like, I'd like to order three," a mellow-hippy voice asked.

"Wrong number!" Mr. Stoppable exclaimed as he slammed the phone down again. This time, he stared at it for a few seconds before he had an idea. He picked the phone up off the hook and set down on the table. Satisfied that he would now be free to enjoy the rest of his evening, he began to thumb through his magazine. The rest of his evening didn't last long.

_Ding. Dong._

The rarely frustrated Stoppable patriarch let out a grumble as he slung himself out of his favorite chair and marched himself to the front door. With a scowl, he swung it open. His look of disdain towards this further interruption to his evening twisted into astonishment at what he saw in his front lawn.

Clowns, mimes, jugglers, acrobats, elephants, lion tamers, and the rest of the makings of a circus covered the property and spilled out into the street. On the porch was a woman practicing her fire eating routine and another man dressed up as a ringmaster.

"Terribly sorry we're late," the man said. "Where do you want us to set up?"

It took Mr. Stoppable several seconds to contemplate the situation. He found out rather quickly he didn't have a clue what was going on.

"Um, beg your pardon, but why exactly are you here?"

"Why for the _Save Bueno Nacho Telethon _of course!" the ringmaster replied.

"What makes you think there's a telethon going on here?" Ron's father asked searching for any logical reason for their presence.

"We're repaying a favor to that young man who sidekick's for Kim Possible. He told us to meet here. Can we talk to him? We need to get the show on; the clowns and the lions are getting restless."

Mr. Stoppable's scowl returned in an instant as he swiveled his head back into the house.

"Ronald!" he shouted. "Would you come down here for a minute? We need to have a talk!"


	4. Jailhouse Blues

Thanks to CajunBear73, MrDrP, Pharaoh Rutin Tutin, conan98002, Jasminevr, Magnatron, Stand Alone Battle A.I, Akinyi, Randy C, Molloy, and RonHeartbreaker for reading and reviewing. This is just a half episode (ala _Sick Day/The Truth Hurts_). I may someday write a companion piece. Maybe.

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation._

* * *

_Episode 3: Jail House Blues_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

The billowing dark folds of a late afternoon thunderstorm loomed across the horizon of the prairie. Rows of corn and wheat stretched on as far as the eye could see. The gentle landscape was only shattered by gray walls of concrete topped with jagged barbs rising from the soil. A bolt flashed across the sky and the delayed roll of thunder soon followed. As the cloud loomed heavy and dark, a gentle rain began to fall and the lights outside the prison, slowly flickered on.

--

The patter of rain vibrated the long block of prison cells. Barred shadows stretched out across the floor. A few drops of water began to pool in places as the seeping rainwater forced its way in. A sad tune wafted off of a harmonica and seemed to match itself to the tapping of the storm.

"Can't seem to find," wailed a tortured gruff voice. "My peace of mind." Another slide of the harmonica interjected before the voice continued, "You're leaving me. It's plain to see."

As the harmonica resumed its sad tortured tale, a pair of hands in metal gloves clinched a pillow over a large mound of black hair. The hands pushed harder and harder as the harmonica riff emanated louder and louder. Reaching its apex, it suddenly ceased. The hands released the head it held hostage from their grip.

"My plan unfurled, to rule the world," the voice interrupted.

A black blur of hair and fury tore towards the bars as the metal gloves clanged against them.

"SHUT UP, ALREADY!" Shego yelled across the cellblock.

In the cell across from her, a shocked and wide-eyed Dr. Drakken in an orange jumpsuit stared back at her. As her lips remained curled baring her teeth and her huffing continued, Drakken's shock turned to annoyance.

"Well, someone has trouble appreciating the blues," Drakken said snobbishly.

"Some_one?_" Shego responded. "Anyone else having trouble appreciating the 'blues'?"

A chorus of 'boos' and 'you stinks' rained down towards Dr. Drakken who took it all with a sneer. Shego grinned with satisfaction. As the taunts died down, a decidedly Jersey accent crooned out, "Seriously, could use a guitar solo. Like ba-nah-wa-wa-wa-waaaaa."

Shego stuck her hand through the bars and aimed at the direction of the last remark only to remember the glove's restraint on her powers. She growled as she sat back onto her bed. Drakken leaned his head against the bars of his cell and sighed.

"They don't tell you about this part when you sign up to take over the world," Drakken sighed. "Evil clones replacing world leaders, monuments to myself that shoot laser beams, mutant fish sticks. I almost had it all if it weren't for Kim Possible."

Shego stayed firm on her bed knees planted into her chin.

"Raise your hand if you almost took over the world but were stopped by Possible," Shego said dryly. Along the length of the cellblock, hands shot out from behind the bars that held their owners' captive in every cell but one.

"Or Stoppable," Shego added as a furry monkey-shaped hand reluctantly poked through the remaining cell.

"But I was _so_ close last time. I could have…" Drakken moaned but was cutoff.

"Aye, not again with your belly aching," Duff Killigan cried stepping out of the shadows of his cell. "We've all been wee close to world domination."

"Killigan?" Drakken asked shocked. "When did you get here?" Killigan rolled his angering eyes.

"I was in here before you and the lass got here," he responded. "Do ye know how daft and boring you sound?"

"Well, I'm sure _your _story is much more interesting considering it ends the same way," Drakken snorted.

"Well, if you must know…" Killigan began.

Shego remained in her bed as she winced and shut her eyes. _Should have let old blue boy keep singing the 'blues.'_ She scolded herself. Shego's metal covered hand reached for her pillow as she began to pray for a transfer to a different part of the prison.

--

Waves crashed into the rocks of the emerald covered island. Strips of green stretched around a rustic castle. It would have made a picture perfect postcard if it were not for a giant bagpipe shaped cannon on the roof of the castle shooting spores.

--

Killigan roared with laughter as he stood on a platform below the hole in the roof where his bagpipe cannon protruded. Kim and Ron stood ready on the floor below.

"Once the world breathes in my mind control spores, they won't have any choice but to play golf _all day,_" Duff cackled. Ron broke his battle stance and pondered.

"Play golf all day?" Ron said inquisitively. "That doesn't sound half bad, huh, K.P.?"

"Aye, and everyone will dress in kilts and eat me favorite haggis!" Killigan continued. Ron's hopefulness faded.

"Okay, what's the plan, Kim?" Ron asked disappointed.

Before Kim could respond, the clang of metal feet stomping the ground echoed through the room. Kim and Ron turned to find a hulking robotic knight with sword drawn menacing towards them. Kim scanned the room quickly as she formulated her attack.

"Ron, get to the controls. I'll deal with this," Kim ordered as she thrust herself towards the knight. The knight's sword growled through the air as it swung at Kim. She leaped as high as she could; the blade cutting right under her feet. Kim arched over the top of the knight and planted her hands on its shoulders and pushed herself back in the air before landing near the corner. Quickly, she grabbed a sword that was sheathed in a coat of arms on the wall.

Duff watched with a wide grin, as his robotic knight seemed to have Kim trapped in the corner. He leaned to watch the action but caught a figure creeping up the stairs from the corner of his eye. With a villainous sneer, Killigan reached behind him and grabbed his driver.

Kim swung her sword and met the knight's with a reverberating clang. The force of the impact almost shook the sword from her hand. Though heavy, Kim managed to move the steel quick enough to work the knight back and give her some fighting room. She glanced to see Ron make it to the top of the platform. As her eyes darted to Killigan, her stomach flopped seeing Duff in mid-swing with his trusty driver launching a golf ball at Ron.

"Ron! Look out!" Kim gasped blocking the knight's latest attack just in time. Ron had cleared the top step to see the ball land at his feet. He coiled and jumped just at the ball exploded sending smoke and pieces of debris everywhere. Kim's eyes panicked, as she couldn't see Ron clear of the danger. She growled as her brow furrowed and she drew her sword back. With a raged grunt, she launched herself at the knight and tried to fight her way to Ron.

"Oops, forgot to yell fore," Killigan said with an evil laugh. He turned to watch his knight battle Kim.

As the smoke cleared high above the floor, Ron dangled from a pair of cables attached to the cannon he had just been able to grab. He could see the catwalk below was blown apart. He began swinging his legs and built some momentum before slinging himself to a safe piece of platform. Killigan was now completely occupied with the battle below. Ron slowly crept up to the cannon's control lever.

Kim was pushing the robotic knight back with each attack furious and almost uncoordinated. _Have to get to Ron, _her mind swirled unaware that he was safe and about to complete his objective. Hurling another jab at the knight, she overextended and the knight blocked with his sword his free hand knocking Kim back towards the wall. Her sword broke free of her hand as she hit the ground. Kim rolled and extended her right arm to grab it but it was her hand that was grabbed instead. The knight yanked her to her feet and pinned her arm against the wall.

"Finish the wee lassie!" Killigan growled as Ron's hand took the canon's control lever. Ron jerked his head to see Kim in a terrible trouble. Kim squirmed as the knight raised its sword. She groped along the wall with her left hand and clasped onto the other sword in the coat of arms. She pulled it just in the nick of time to block the knight's attack. With a sigh of relief, Ron pushed the lever from 'on' to 'off' and the cannon sputtered to a stop.

"Aye, it appears the lass is ambidextrous," Killigan commented.

"Amba…what?" Ron asked confused. "That doesn't sound like a word."

"It is so a word, laddie," Killigan said annoyed and turning slightly towards Ron. "It's the ability to use both hands equally." Killigan looked back at the battle before the realization struck him.

"How'd you…?" Duff cried. "Oh, never mind." Duff grabbed his driver and lurched toward Ron who was still pondering the new information.

"Why would you need a word for that?" Ron asked before Killigan flung his club over Ron's head and pulled him into a bear hug. As Killigan pulled back to put the squeeze on, Ron's legs lifted in the air and connected with the control lever knocking it from 'off' to 'reverse.'

Rufus leapt from Ron's pocket and onto Duff's shoulder as Ron struggled against Killigan's powerful frame. The naked mole rat grabbed the fabric of Duff's kilt and chomped letting the Scotsman's kilt fall to the floor.

Feeling the breeze from his now barely clothed bottom half, Duff released his grip on Ron and looking down, blushed crimson. Kim blocked a close thrust from the knight and using the handle of her sword, butted it into the knight's head. With her foe disoriented, Kim swung her blade with everything she had and buried it into the robot's torso. Sparks flew as the malfunctioning knight stumbled. Kim jumped and planted her feet into the knight's chest pushing it back while pushing her a safe distance away as it dropped to the ground and erupted in flames.

Kim turned back to the platform and was relieved to see Ron a few feet from Killigan doubled over laughing. Her relief was short lived as she caught sight of what Ron was laughing about--Killigan in his tighty-whities.

"Is it that funny when it happens to me?" Ron asked gasping for air and holding his gut.

Ron put his hand on the railing and measured his jump to the floor below and flung himself over. As he cleared the rail, the hook on his mission belt grabbed the rail and Ron flipped. As he crashed to the floor in a pile, his pants slowly floated down and landed on the floor. Kim burst into laughter as Ron pulled himself up.

"Yes it is!" Kim exclaimed wiping a tear from her eye.

As both Killigan and Ron struggled to get their dysfunctional clothing back into place, the bag attached to the cannon had begun to plug the hole in the roof and bulged further into the room. Killigan tied his kilt back together and turned to Kim and Ron.

"Grrrah! Back to business," Killigan fumed as he grabbed two golf balls from his pouch. But before he could swing away, his ever-expanding bagpipe cannon knocked him down pinning him to the floor and began to spill down filling the room faster and faster.

As Ron finished heaving his pants up to their proper place, Kim grabbed his arm and jerked him to the nearest door just as the bagpipe filled the entire room.

--

Three small figures ran out the front gate of the castle. Out of each window and doorway, the stretched bag began to pop out. The cannon end of the bagpipe continued to furiously suck in air and mind control spores.

As Kim and Ron made their way across the castle's drawbridge, they could here the fabric of the bagpipe begin to tear ready to burst. As Ron scooped Rufus into his hands, Kim nudged him over the edge of the bridge to the moat bellow as she dove after him. As the three hit the water, the crack of the bag reaching its limit shuddered the bricks of the castle in a massive rush of air and debris.

--

"Mind control spore?" Drakken said with a raised eyebrow. "Wish I thought of that."

"Oh, please," Shego scoffed. "Mind control schemes are so overdone."

"I agree," shot a frail voice from another cell. Shego, Drakken, and Killigan all turned to see who had said it.

"And you are?" Shego asked less than interested.

"Frugal Lucre," said the thin and weak looking man.

"Frugal Lucre? Cheapest 'super villain' in the world, Frugal Lucre?" Shego asked mockingly.

"In the flesh," he replied confidently. "Would have taken over the world at a fraction of the cost one of you fools spend."

"So what stopped you? Wasn't double coupon day at Smarty Mart?" Shego teased.

"No, Kim Possible got in my way," Lucre stated with a sneer.

"What?!" Shego asked shocked. "You put something together big enough that Possible had to step in? Oh! Now I gotta know. Tell me. How'd she stick it to you?"

--

"…and by the time that everyone in the world realizes that my program has been shaving a penny off of every paycheck, my fortune will be complete!" Frugal Lucre stated ringing his hands and beginning an evil chuckle.

Kim and Ron sat behind bars in a cell deep in Lucre's lair. Kim tightened her grip on the bars that held them in as she stared back at Lucre. Ron sat on the floor surrounded by piles of newspapers and boxes of plastic bottles and aluminum cans. He thumbed through a couple of papers and turned to look at Lucre.

"So, if you're trying to amass a giant fortune, what's with all the newspapers and other trash?" Ron inquired.

"If you must know," Lucre stated matter-of-factly. "That _trash_ when recycled funds my operations and those newspapers make for an excellent evil lair construction material."

"You mean this entire lair is made out of newspaper?" Kim asked in disbelief.

"Correct, the latest in paper mache technology. Now if you'll excuse me I have an ultimatum to deliver," Lucre said as he turned and left the room. Kim went into thought formulating a plan. Ron turned his attention to another stack of papers that caught his eye.

"Mutant bat boy fights alien in Chinese cave!" Ron said astonished as he began to pick up the paper with the faked photograph on the front. Kim grabbed the paper from his hands and headed for the sink.

"Hey! I was reading that," Ron objected. Kim ignored him as she tightened the paper into a cone and began to fill it with water. Ron looked back down at the stack of papers.

"Ooo, a crossword," Ron said as he picked up the paper and began to look over the clues. Kim passed him and stood in front of the bars. She poured the water out of the makeshift newspaper pitcher down one of the bars and waited.

"Okay, looking for a kind of salmon," Ron said. "Four letters."

Kim had backed up from the bars, but sprinted forward and kicked at the weakened bar. It gave way with a slosh.

"Let's go, Ron," Kim said calmly.

"Lesko? Never heard of it," Ron said as he tried to pencil it into the puzzle.

"No, Ron, _let's go_," Kim said impatiently. Ron looked up to see Kim on the other side of the bars.

"Oh!" Ron said with an embarrassed laugh. "Right."

Ron stood and followed Kim discreetly erasing his incorrect answer from the puzzle.

--

"Wait a minute! Wait a minute!" Shego interjected mouth gaping. "You built your lair out of paper mache?!" When Lucre didn't respond, Shego howled with laughter and rolled on the floor. The other villains each began to laugh a bit as Lucre sneered.

"You," Shego said as she pointed across the cellblock to Drakken. "You are no longer the lamest villain I've ever met." Shego continued her fit of hysteria. Drakken growled and matched Lucre's scowl.

"You know, it's not like spending a lot of money has worked out for anyone," Lucre retorted. "Look at old Senior over there."

Hanging half out of the shadows of his cell, Señior Senior, Sr. leaned forward and sighed.

"It is true," Senior said sadly. "My vast fortunes have not brought me victory over Kim Possible and control of the world."

"I don't get it," Shego said still half-giggling. "With what you could put together, you should have sent Princess and the dork packing a long time ago."

"Well, it's not that simple," Senior replied gathering his thoughts.

--

The main living room of the Senior's lair was dark save for a few patches of moonlight creeping in the windows. Another beam of light suddenly shot into the room through a newly made hole in the roof. Two ropes dropped down to the ground and Kim quickly slid to the bottom. Ron was slowly lowering down his rope as Rufus did all the work on the pulley. With a light shining from his helmet, Ron was occupied by the crossword puzzle.

No sooner had Kim hit the ground than did the lights flip on.

"Ah, Kim Possible," Señior Senior, Sr. said dignified; his son Jr. by his side. "We meet once again in the epic struggle of good and evil."

"Give it up, Senior," Kim ordered.

"But if I give up, I can't show you the improvements to my lair," Senior crooned revealing a remote which he quickly pressed.

"Bad guy hiding place… Four letters… Lair! How ironic," Ron shouted half way down the rope as he began to pencil in his answer.

From the depths of the lagoon, a large set of tentacles splashed out of the water, one of them grabbing Kim and hoisting her into the air.

"I have upgraded from the piranhas and the koi," Senior stated proudly. "Mutant squid. And I have a new voice activated self-destruct sequence."

Kim, in the clutches of the mutant squid flashed a look of scorn towards Ron who had finally reached the bottom of his rope.

"Ron! Have you been making 'suggestions' to the Seniors again?" Kim asked angrily.

"I may have said some things in passing, Kim," Ron defended. "I'm only human… Oh! Human." Ron scribbled in another answer as Kim rolled her eyes. Under the tightening grip of the squid, Kim got to her laser lipstick.

"Why do you villains always put a self-destruct mechanism in your lair?" Kim asked as she curled the laser around firing a shot into the squid's skin. With a yelp, it released her to the ground and dove back into the water.

"Because, we can leave our foes in peril should we need to abandon a lair," Senior responded holding up his copy of _So You Want to Rule the World._

Kim stood up and gagged at the mutant squid slime she found herself covered in.

"Okay, whatever, enough fooling around," Kim said annoyed. "Surrender now, Señior Senior Sr. and I'll tell the authorities what a nice cooperative super villain you've been."

"Oh, I don't think so, Miss Possible," Senior snorted. "I haven't even revealed my evil plan yet."

"Ability to use both hands… Twelve letters," Ron thought out loud.

"Ron," Kim shouted as she turned to him. "Head in the game!" As she turned back to Señior Senior, Sr., she was taken back by the look of panic on his face as he dropped the book and remote and clutched his cane.

_What could make him suddenly become so terrified?_ Kim wondered. Turning to see if the squid had returned, she was only more perplexed.

"Amba… Amber… What was that word Killigan made up?" Ron continued as it suddenly hit Kim.

"Ambidextrous!" she declared with a grin.

"K.P., you've got to give me a chance to get it," Ron stated indignant. In the corner, a small computer kicked on and began to hum.

"Self-destruct code verified. Thank you," the computer said pleasantly. Red flashing lights filled the room as an alarm began to wail.

Señior Senior, Sr. had begun to backpedal as his son tapped his shoulder.

"Father, do you think I have time to get those designer boots out of my room?" Jr. asked as if they were just getting ready to go to the movies.

--

The pounding of the storm had subsided. Only a few drops of water leaked through the prison. A faint flash of lighting lit the cellblock where all the various criminals and super villains were shut away either sleeping or plotting. A lone prison guard made his rounds flashlight in hand taking a head count. Shining it briefly in cell after cell, he pointed it into the only cell containing a woman in the entire prison.

By force of habit, he continued on before realizing that he had not seen a body in the bed. He frantically shined his light in every corner of the cell seeing nothing. He fumbled with his keys and unlocked the cell taking a couple steps in. He hyperventilated in disbelief; his hand scratched his head. No sooner than had he entered the cell than did a green glow filled the small confines from behind him.

An evil male voice menaced from behind the guard too terrified to turn around.

"If you don't mind, we'll be leaving now."


	5. School's Out?

Thanks to Pharaoh Rutin Tutin, daywalkr82, CajunBear73, kpfan72491, Molloy, Stand Alone Battle A.I, Magnatron, Akinyi, Randy C, Molloy, RonHeartbreaker, and Danny-171984 for reading and reviewing. They all got personalize thank you's. Don't forget to get yours!

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation. Juan Valdez is a registered trademark of the __National Federation of Coffee Growers of Colombia…_

* * *

_Episode 4: School's Out?_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

Students burst through the doors of Middleton High School and soaked up the glorious Monday afternoon. It was glorious not just because it was postcard perfect weather, but because this was the last Monday of the school year. In just a few more days, the freshmen would no longer be the lowest forms of life. The sophomores would now be upperclassmen. The juniors would rule the school as seniors. And the seniors would be free forever! Although, a few seniors found disappointment that their secret 'Senior Skip Day' plans had been sniffed out by the administration. The school's marquee now quipped:

_Skipping school to bungee jump will get you suspended._

Everyone had an extra pep in their step as they dashed to their cars or began to walk home. Everyone except…

--

"Stoppable! Explain yourself!" Mr. Barkin bellowed.

Gladys, the school's secretary, glanced up from her computer to see a sight she had seen many times before in that office. Well, almost. As usual, Ron was frozen in place as Middleton High's all-purpose educator loomed over him. The difference this time came in the splotches of cheddar cheese and kernels of popcorn that each were covered in. Amusing as the sight may have been, Gladys wasn't going to stick around. She paused her work entering the students' grade reports into the computer and slipped out the office door.

Ron, who didn't have the luxury of leaving, stared back at the man whose workload within the school seemed to defy the laws of space and time. With a gulp, Ron tried to remember exactly where things went wrong…

--

Students donned aprons and goggles as each began to handle the two beakers at their lab stations. Mr. Barkin stood at the front of the classroom in the same safety gear as everyone else informing the students of the proper mixing procedures. In the lab station furthest from the front, Ron shot a couple glances forward to make sure he wasn't drawing any attention to himself. Carefully, he pulled a block of cheese from his backpack as Rufus jumped up onto the counter with a bag of un-popped popcorn.

"Time for some real science, buddy," Ron said enthusiastically to his naked mole rat as he lit the Bunsen burner.

--

Ron had no choice but to backpedal as Mr. Barkin pushed farther and farther into the blonde's face.

"I'd recommend you for suspension but that would mean you would miss valuable class time," the educator barked. Ron ran out of room as he bumped into the secretary's desk. "Obviously, you aren't responding to my disciplinary program so maybe it's time for some out of the box thinking…"

Ron had been pushed so far back that he was forced to place his hand on the computer's keyboard to brace himself. As he did so, the last student whose grades had been entered appeared on the screen: Possible, Kimberly A.

"…I have no idea what it is going to entail, but rest assured…," Barkin continued. On the screen a warning message now hovered over Kim's grades that read: _Are you sure you want to delete entry?_

"…when I figure out what to do with you, you'll either be ready to join an elite military academy or go crying home to your mama!"

Mr. Barkin pulled himself out of Ron's face and, with a snort, exited the office. The blonde watched him all the way out the door before relaxing. As he did, his hand ever so slightly grazed the 'enter' key. With a barely noticeable hum, Kim's information on the screen went blank before being replaced by the next student to be listed alphabetically: Potts, Randy B. Sighing nervously, Ron headed for the hallway.

* * *

Kim rounded the corner hurriedly searching for Ron. She barely had time to change into her cheer uniform let alone track down her best friend and school mascot. Finally, she spotted him grabbing books out of his locker. Before she could begin her interrogation of where he'd been, she took notice of the cheese and popcorn covering the boy.

"Do I even want to know?" Kim asked as Ron shut his locker.

"Science class; Bunsen burners; cheese; you know: the usual," Ron said dryly as the pair began to head for the gym.

"So I'm betting you've got some one-on-one time with Barkin in detention?" the redhead inquired.

"Nope," said Ron with despair. "He decided he was going 'outside the box' this time."

Kim shuddered. Mr. Barkin getting creative with disciplinary techniques could only spell doom for her boyfriend.

"Well, it's been nice knowing you," she said. Ron nearly wilted at the thought forcing Kim to take his hand.

"It won't be as bad as you think," Kim tried to console. "Now get changed out of those clothes and meet me in the gym for the cheerleading tryouts. Tara can't make it and I need you to balance out Bonnie on the selection committee."

--

The sun headed for its daily appointment with the horizon but before slipping completely out of site, it painted a dazzling orange picture across the western sky. Without paying the beautiful setting any mind, two figures entered the Possible family home.

"Next year's squad is going to be badical!" Ron exclaimed as he set his Mad Dog gear down in the entry hall.

"Yeah, if I spend every waking hour this summer whipping them into shape," Kim groaned as she followed him inside. As she set down her duffle bag next to Ron's things, the phone rang.

"I got it!" Mr. Dr. Possible yelled as he swooped in and grabbed the handset. "I've been expecting a call from the Space Center all day."

Kim's father rushed into the next room before either teen could respond. Ron resumed their conversation.

"Oh, come on, K.P., those new girls were pretty good."

"Ron, you voted for the girl who did the 'Macarena' as her routine," the cheerleader countered.

"In my defense," Ron responded with mock umbrage. "You told me to do the opposite of what Bonnie did."

Kim opened her mouth to retort but realized she didn't have anything to fire back. For once, Ron had her.

"Well, I guess that was my fault," she said in surrender before pulling Ron into a light hug. "You want to stick around for dinner or are you going home to snack on your t-shirt?"

"Okay, first, of course I'm staying for dinner and second, don't knock the Pop-cheese. It's the next great American snack food. Just as soon as I figure out how to make it…"

"Says the inventor of the 'naco'," Kim said smiling back up at him. With the conversation winding down, more amorous feelings began flowing between the two. Had the twins been in the vicinity, a Level 5 kootie alert would have been issued. Instead, the duo appeared to have an uninterrupted opportunity for a lip-lock and began taking all necessary actions to achieve that objective until…

"Kimmie," Mrs. Dr. Possible said in a quiet but stern voice. The young couple separated faster than an ice berg falling off the ice caps due to global warming. "I think it might be best if Ronald went home."

James entered the hall and stood next to his wife still holding the phone.

"I just got off the phone with your school," he began. "There's some sort of issue with your grades…"

--

"This is ferociously unfair," Kim huffed. She crossed her arms for emphasis only to draw ireful stares from her parents who were seated on either side of her.

"I'm sorry," Mr. Barkin stated matter-of-factly. "But according to the computer, we have no record of you completing your course work."

"But don't you have a backup grade sheet?" Mrs. Dr. Possible asked.

"We throw it out after the grades get entered. If we kept it, we wouldn't need the computer."

"Yeah, that makes sense," Kim sassed. Her father let out a nervous laugh embarrassed by his daughter's behavior.

"Okay, what are Kim's options?" Mr. Dr. Possible inquired.

"Well, first, she could go to summer school," the educator began. Kim snorted at the notion. "Or, she could complete all the course work she's missing before the school year is over."

"And if she doesn't?" Kim's mom asked.

"We'll have no choice but to hold her back."

All eyes turned to Kim waiting for her decision. With a deep breath, a look of determination entrenched itself on her face.

--

"Whoa! Kim, mondo bueno solution!" Ron exclaimed despite being weighed down by a large stack of Kim's books. Kim was equally loaded. "Just have Wade hack into to school system and change your grades back!"

"All ready thought about it," Kim said deflated. "But that would be a bit too suspicious. I don't need cheating added to my troubles. Speaking of trouble, did Barkin lay the law down on you yet?"

"Nope!" he declared with an almost devilish glint in his eyes. "And according to my sources…"

"The two guys in the cafeteria?"

"K.P., sources sounds way cooler and…, yes. They said if Barkin doesn't assign a punishment before the end of the year, it can't carry over to the next."

"Okay," Kim said skeptically. "But how are you going to manage avoiding Barkin? He teaches most of your classes."

"One step ahead of you, Kim," the sidekick grinned.

--

Mr. Barkin stood before the class with an open book in his hand; reading glasses in the other. Most of the students were halfway to dreamland but he didn't seem to notice.

"So the author's use of the caterpillar and the butterfly is a symbolization of the transitions we all experience in life. Wouldn't you agree…, new guy?"

In the middle of the room, a young man who looked like a young Juan Valdez in a sombrero and poncho perked up. A small rodent with a mule pack and donkey ears continued to sulk at the outrageousness of the disguise on his shoulder.

"Si!" came Ron's muffled reply from behind his mask.

--

The Possible's living room was littered with paper, open books, and fast food wrappers. Kim was laying on the floor scribbling out math problems one after the other. Ron was sprawled on the couch summarizing her English reading. Kim first resisted the idea concerned it was 'cheatish', but her mother convinced her it was a necessary compromise. The redhead put the finishing touches on another assignment and tossed it in the 'complete' pile. Rolling over, she began to stretch her aching hand.

"How's _Low the Plow…_ now that you're actually reading it this time?" Kim asked looking up at Ron. He never took his eyes the book as he responded.

"I've seen nothing to change my original critique," he said dryly.

With a deep sigh, Kim turned back to her math assignments. Three hours into the homework marathon, the numbers were already blurring together. She was torn between taking a break that she really didn't have time for or pressing ahead with mediocre work.

_Beep-beep. Ba-beep._ The Kimunicator decided for her.

"Go, Wade," Kim said as she activated the device.

"How's the homework sitch coming?" the boy genius asked as he flashed on the screen.

"As well as can be expected."

"You know, I could hack into…"

"Don't tempt me, Wade," Kim interrupted. "What do you have for us?"

"Drakken and Shego busted out last night and they're on the move," Wade said seriously.

"You got them tracked?" asked Kim as she stood.

"They're breaking into a top secret lab outside Middleton right now. And get this: if you foil them again, they'll set the record for most failed plots by a super villain."

"Well, let's not keep the record books waiting," Kim said as she began to head for the stairs. She only took a couple steps before her mom blocked her path.

"Kim, I don't think you have time to go chasing after villains," Mrs. Dr. Possible stated in a motherly tone.

"But if I don't go, who will?" Kim instantly objected.

"I can think of someone who's capable," her mother said motioning her head to her solution. Kim turned around to see Ron still on the couch. The book had been tossed aside and he was now trying to balance a pencil on the tip of his nose. Kim immediately spun back to her mother.

"Uh-uh. No way! Maybe if it was just Drakken, but I can't send Ron by himself against Shego!" the younger redhead declared indignantly. Ron snapped into the conversation at the mention of his name in the same sentence as Shego's.

"Actually, Kim, he doesn't have to go by himself," Wade said still on the Kimunicator. The door bell chimed as soon as he had finished. Kim, Ron, and Mrs. Dr. Possible made their way to the entry hall and opened the door. Each of the three was surprised to see… nothing.

"Wade…," Kim said, but before she continue giving voice to her doubts, the stealthy outline of the Wadebot filled itself in. Wade's smiling face occupied its front screen. Nothing looked too different about the contraption except for the fact that its tank treads were gone – it was hovering.

"I give you the Wadebot 3.0!" its creator proudly said. "Now complete with virtual reality battle mode!"

He held up a set of control gloves and VR helmet.

"I think it's time for a road test," Wade continued. Ron and Rufus enthusiastically inspected the new 'bot. The blonde hopped on the back.

"Why would you need to _road_ test it? It's a hovercraft!" Ron said sincerely.

"Well, Kim, what do you say?" the elder redhead said with a sly smile. Kim grunted as she realized that she really didn't have a choice.

"Fine," she conceded. "But _be careful!_"

"Booyah!" Ron and Rufus shouted in unison. Ron stuck his hand in the air. "Give me five, Wade!"

Wade took control of the robot and obliged. The sidekick regretted his request as soon as the robot's hand impacted with his.

"Okay, we still need to work on that," he said cradling his now throbbing hand. Kim shuddered and let out a groan.

* * *

The mountains west of Middleton contained beauty only rivaled by that of the National Park System. Tall pine and fir trees gave the rocky ridges a green coat of vegetation. Mountain streams teamed with fish as they poured down into fresh ponds and lakes.

Skirting along a mountain road making its way to the top secret lab, the Wadebot hovered around the road's twists and turns – Ron hanging on for dear life. The robot's monitor swung around to face Ron.

"We're almost there," Wade said onscreen. With a couple of pushed buttons, a security feed from the lab popped on screen. "Drakken and Shego are already inside."

Through the eye of the security camera, the villainous duo could clearly be seen. Dr. Drakken weaved his way around various devices and top secret projects. Shego was right behind him – a look of boredom on her face - pushing a hover cart that her boss would occasionally place something in.

"Looks like we got a 'hover' theme going today," Ron quipped.

--

Tiny gloved hands picked up a rather small electronic device and held it up for black-ringed beady eyes to examine. After a series of twists and turns, and a few squints at the object's features, it failed to captivate the blue-skinned villain's interest and was quickly dropped. Before the poor device made it to the table, another object caught Dr. Drakken's eye. The evil genius rushed over to the workbench it was located on and produced a shopping list of sorts. Looking at the list and back to the new object of affection several times, Drakken finally turned and beamed towards his henchwoman.

"Shego!" he declared as his hand swept in front of the device like a sales model. "Do you know what this is?"

Shego rolled her eyes as she looked up from her copy of _Villain's Digest_ that she had been reading while pushing the hover cart. Before she gave an automatic 'no', she had to take a second look.

"A blender," she said dryly. "Are we taking over the world with evil smoothies this time?"

The blue-skinned villain looked back at the work bench to see he was showing off the wrong item – a Blend-o-matic 3000. He took a half step to his right and picked up the right device and began making his way to the cart.

"This…," Drakken said holding it higher so Shego could see it. "…is a magnetic field reverser coil."

"Sounds neat," Shego flatly responded before returning to her magazine. Drakken grumbled a bit but rather than press the issue and explain its purpose, he placed the MFRC in the cart and crossed it off his list.

The duo continued their 'shopping spree', the self-proclaimed doctor adhering to his list – his sidekick not giving him anymore notice than she had to. However, as they passed a blue floating orb on a pedestal, Shego finally got curios about something. Dr. Drakken paid it no mind and walked on by, but the olive skinned woman took a closer look. Tiny electrical charges danced around its outer shell. Nothing seemed to support it – the orb just hovered there.

"What's this thing?" Shego asked as she reached out to touch it. In a move that should have well been his last among the living, Drakken slapped her hand away before she could reach halfway to the floating ball. Shego was torn between burning her boss to a crisp or unleashing a verbal tirade never before seen. Her indecision allowed him to explain.

"_That_ is an anti-proton nexus containment field!" the evil genius stated in a life-or-death tone. Shego's welling internal rage at his hand slap aside, she couldn't resist herself.

"How much of that did you just make up?" she sassed.

"None of it," Drakken responded as he resumed his previous course. "If the field were to become destabilized in any way, it would blow every molecule in this room into tiny pieces."

"Then you'd better keep that thing away from me, cause I like my molecules in regular sized," Ron Stoppable said confidently as he stepped out of the shadows – Rufus posed likewise on his shoulder. In an instant, Shego ditched the hover cart and closed a good portion of the distance between herself and Ron. Taking an aggressive battle stance, the green clad villainess was ready for Kim's counter-move.

"So, Kim Possible and the buffoon are here to…," Drakken began ranting before being cutoff by Ron.

"Actually, first: Kim's not here. And second: I thought you were going to start using my name!" Ron complained as Drakken took an inquisitive look at the boy and began muttering last names that started with 's'. Shego, on the other hand, had a different response.

"Hang on: did you just say your little _girlfriend's_ not here?" Shego asked.

"Nope," Ron replied taking two bold steps forward. "She's got homework. Lots and lots of homework…,"

"See what I mean by us losing respect in the community," Shego almost growled as she turned to Drakken. "They're only sending the sidekicks after us now!"

The evil genius merely lifted his nose in response not wanting to acknowledge Shego's little barb. As he turned his head away, yet another top-secret device caught his attention. With a quick check to his list, an evil grin spread across his face.

"Oh, well. It all pays the same," Shego said with a sneer as she turned back to Ron and ignited her plasma. The blonde teenager suddenly realized that he was about to square off with one of the most dangerous women on the planet and naturally took a step back. But fortunately for him, something in the inner recesses of the woman's mind connected a few dots and raised the red flag.

"Wait a second. Time out," she said extinguishing her hands and relaxing her posture. "I called Possible your girlfriend and you didn't freak out."

"Yeah, so?" Ron said unsure of where Shego was going.

"But…, you always freak out and get defensive when I call her that," the henchwoman pressed – her suspicions rising.

"I do not!" he replied sharply.

"And now you're getting defensive about being defensive. It's as if you were…," and then it suddenly dawned on Shego. As the first few giggles escaped her, she began to look at the teen in amazement. Never in a million years did she ever think it was possible, but then again…

"You and Princess are actually…, _dating_!"

When all Ron could do was nervously smile back at her, the raven haired woman lost it. Waves of uproarious laughter spilled out of her as she clutched her gut. Ron failed to find humor in the situation as his 'serious face' came out to play.

"Wait till the other villains get a load of…," Shego began before a size twelve boot buried itself in her gut sending her flat on her back. As the air she so desperately needed to finish her insult didn't bother to say goodbye on its way out of her lungs, she opened her eyes just in time to see Stoppable springboarding off of her and over towards Drakken.

Landing with surprising poise, Ron cut-off the blue-skinned nemesis before he could reach his prize. Drakken stumbled back a few steps before tripping and falling on his rear. The blonde was getting a rare taste of what it was like to be Kim (that didn't involve switching bodies).

"Would you like pin-stripes or an orange jumpsuit with that prison sentence?" the teen hero said advancing on the doctor who had begun to crawl backward in fear.

"Shego!" Drakken yelped. "Get up here! The buffoon suddenly has moves!"

"Hey!" Ron shot back as he pulled up. "I've always had moves!"

Drakken considered the notion for a brief second and formulated a response.

"Well, now you're actually using them and it's freaking me out!"

"Yeah, it's kind of scaring me too…," Ron said with a smile completely out of the moment. Before he could realize the mistake, a pair of hands seized the front of his mission shirt and lifted him off the ground. An extremely irate Shego was now snorting like an enraged bull in his face.

"Okay, this is more like it," he said – his more fearful self returning.

"Sidekicks should know their place, remember?" the henchwoman snarled at him. With the enraged desire to pay back Ron for the Zorpox incident, Shego raised her right hand in a chillingly sharp claw and ignited it.

"Couldn't agree with you more. Wade! Now!" Ron hollered with a mixture of slyness and panic. Before Shego could deliver the crushing blow, her jaw snapped sideways as she released the blonde from her grasp. As Ron hit the floor, Shego tumbled into the corner left to wonder what in the world had just hit her. The 'what' being the Wadebot 3.0 filled itself in and tracked towards her.

"In case you were wondering," Wade said on the robot's screen while putting on the VR gloves and helmet. "Ron's on point today. I've got the sidekicking duties…"

The olive-skinned henchwoman stood as she worked her jaw back into position. Rage boiled over at the thought of being bested by a twelve-year old playing a video game. Shego let every muscle in her body access her power as she readied to charge.

"So the nerdlinger wants to play…! Game on!" Shego roared as she flared up her powers to the max. Sprinting forward, the woman in green hurled bolts of plasma at her new target.

Meanwhile, Drakken had taken full advantage of the diversion and made his way to a device that looked a lot like a ray gun. If it hadn't had been for Rufus's desperate squeaks, Ron would have remained enthralled with the battle between Shego and the Wadebot. Following his mole rat's pointing, the teen hero turned in time to see Dr. Drakken lifting the ray gun off its stand. Quickly jumping to his feet, Ron looked around for a plan and, spotting the magnetic field reverser coil, picked it up out of the hover cart and hurled it towards Drakken.

"Finally, with the Neural Harmonic Compliance Ray, it is I, Dr. Drakk…ne-eroOOoh!" the evil genius screamed as the MFRC collided with his forehead mid-rant. As he fell backwards, the neural ray flew up into the air tumbling end over end and seemed to be headed for an untimely demise against the floor until Ron made a sliding catch to save it.

"Booyah!" Ron exclaimed getting back to his feet. "Saved the Neural… harmonica… thingy…"

No sooner than had the teen finished than had Dr. Drakken recovered and grabbed a piece of the ray gun for himself – a fresh welt on his forehead.

"Give that to me!" the blue-skinned villain declared.

"No way!" came Ron's predictable response.

With neither side budging, the NHCR became the object of a high-stakes tug of war. The two grunted and strained against the other occasionally peppering the engagement with a misplaced kick or shove. With Ron and Drakken completely focused on each other, Rufus took the opportunity to climb across the battle lines and crawl up onto Drakken's head. Leaning into the evil genius's field of vision, the pink rodent gave a "Hello!" accompanied by a wave.

"Ahhh! Get it off me!" Dr. Drakken shouted in a high pitched squeal.

His adversary properly distracted, Ron easily yanked the compliance ray out of Drakken's tiny hands. As Rufus made a last second jump from the doctor's head back to Ron's shoulder, Ron, in a rare moment of aggressive bravado, delivered a spinning kick into the blue-skinned villain's midsection and sent him flying across the room. It would have been a perfect moment of triumph for the boy had Drakken then not collided with the pedestal holding the anti-proton nexus containment field sending the blue orb rolling across the lab's floor.

High above the ground, Shego was perched on the ledge that ringed the lab's walls. She was gripped hand-to-hand with the Wadebot which was hovering upside down just above her. A sudden white flash bright enough to make even Wade shield his eyes on his monitor forced both parties to disengage.

"Oh no!" Wade exclaimed as he swiveled his robot around to get a view of what just happened. "Not the anti-proton nexus containment field!"

"So, Dr. D. wasn't making it all up?" Shego groaned. She had a pretty good idea what was going to happen next.

"'Fraid not," Wade said with concern.

"And that's bad for us, right?"

"Yep."

Shego furrowed her brow and grumbled something before leaping from the ledge and sprinting to her now terrified employer. She yanked him off the floor as she fired a bolt of plasma through the wall to reveal their hover car parked outside.

"But the Neural Harmonic Compliance Ray!" Drakken protested as his employee shoved him through the new exit.

"_But the giant orb of death that's about to blast us into tiny pieces_," Shego mocked back.

As the villains made a hasty retreat, Ron and Rufus were left alone in the middle of the lab both shielding their eyes from the ever expanding APNCF. Before either one had a thought of their own escape, the Wadebot swooped in for the save. Ron wasted no time hopping on the back.

"Hang on tight!" Wade declared as his robot produced two small rockets out of each side blasting them towards the open skylight they had used to get in. With the full force of the rockets, Ron instinctively dropped the compliance ray to secure himself to the Wadebot. He realized a moment to late what he had done and could only watch as the ray gun plummeted to the floor and shattered into pieces.

"Ah, man! That tanks!" Ron said as they zoomed out of the building at full speed. In a matter of seconds, energy bolts enveloped the soon to be _former_ top secret lab before a bright blast of light incinerated it. The Wadebot, with its passengers still secure, skimmed the treetops just ahead of the blast riding all the way to safety.

--

Teenagers floated through the halls of Middleton High with rampant anticipation as the countdown to the summer could now be more easily measured in hours instead of days. Time could not tick by fast enough for any of them as they hit their lockers to get their books for their next classes. Then again, for one student, time couldn't crawl slowly enough…

Kim wasn't going to let a little thing like having to walk from one place to another stop her from completing her mission. Though there were some nasty lines forming under her eyes and she looked as if she hadn't paid attention to her appearance that morning, she was as focused as ever. Ron dutifully held a biology book out in front of her as he was forced to walk backwards through the crowd trying his best to keep the book steady and not run into anybody. The redhead jotted down another answer as Ron tried to get her attention.

"K.P., are you even listening to me?" Ron groaned.

"You were talking about totally kicking Drakken's biscuit, stopping him and Shego, and blowing up an eight billion dollar research facility," his girlfriend replied flatly as she continued writing.

"Kim, we're trying to leave out the part about blowing up the lab," Ron said as they reached Kim's locker. "Not good on the public relations front…"

With a flurry of pencil activity, the redhead finished the assignment and slammed the book shut after taking it from her boyfriend's hands.

"That takes care of the science classes," she said sliding down to the floor in an exhausted clump. "Would you be a dear and grab my English book for me?"

Ron got a small smile out of being called 'dear'. Terms of affection were still a novelty between the couple. Opening Kim's locker and grabbing the appropriate book, Ron was greeted by Wade on the monitor.

"Hey, Ron! Where's Kim?" the boy genius asked. Before Ron could answer, a rather loud snore emanated from below. The blonde looked down to see Kim resting her head against his leg-eyes shut. A trail of drool was sliding out of her gaping mouth and down his pants.

"Do you think she's going to make it? She's only got thirty-eight hours to go," Wade worriedly said.

"Of course," Ron replied as the look on his face betrayed him. "This is Kim we're talking about… Got anything else on the Drakken/Shego thing?"

"Nothing solid to go on," said the tech guru. "But I did talk GJ about the record…"

"And?" Ron asked perking up.

"No go," Wade said. The sidekick slumped at the news. "Apparently, you have to stop an actual plan _and_ capture them for it to count. By those standards, we went O-for-two."

"Ah man, more tankage…"

"But I did find out you set an individual record."

"Really, which mark on the record books is the Ron-ster the new owner of?"

"Most missions where a lab or lair blew up."

Ron weighed the news with a shift of his eyebrow before giving a light smile and a shrug of the shoulders.

"A record's a record…"

--

Boxes of unmarked junk and equipment filled almost every useable inch of the time-share lair. What little floor space was left was covered by packing peanuts and bubble wrap. Dr. Drakken had seated himself on a semi-crushed empty box. Another box served as some sort of a desk. With a very cross expression on his face, Drakken was staring at a small model. Three tiny figures in Team Possible mission gear and matching red, blonde, and no hair were poised to face their doom before a toy laser. The evil genius's hand quivered over the 'annihilate' button, but he just wasn't in the mood. He pushed the model aside and set his head on the make-shift desk.

"…I know! I couldn't believe it either!" Shego laughed into her cell phone as she walked through the maze of boxes. Dropping a load of bills in her boss's face, she continued.

"Apparently, they got together at the prom… Wonder whose fault that is?" Shego sassed as she directed the statement more towards Drakken than whoever she was talking with.

The blue-skinned villain growled as he looked up from the late notice he had opened. Crumpling it up, he tossed it over his shoulder with the rest of the bills.

"Anyway, good luck with that hostile take-over. Buh-bye!" said Shego before she flipped her phone closed.

"Who was that?" Drakken asked as he raised an eyebrow over the rather polite 'good-bye'.

"My financial advisor," the henchwoman replied picking up one of the discarded bills and waiving it in Drakken's face. "You should talk to him."

"Oh, please," Drakken scoffed. "They're just bloodthirsty sharks after another commission. I can manage my finances just fine!"

"Suit yourself," Shego replied. Becoming bored with the conversation, she vaporized the bill she was holding.

With a heavy sigh, Dr. Drakken rested his head back on his table-box.

"This is so ferociously unfair," he moaned. "If it weren't for the buffoon and that techno nerd, I'd have the most technologically advanced arsenal on the planet. It's not right that a man of my genius and cunning is constantly thwarted by teenagers…"

"Poor Dr. D.," Shego said feigning sympathy as she began to file her nails. "Tossed aside in the trash pile just like all that expensive stuff Stoppable blew up."

"Shego," the mad scientist grumbled. "What have I said about mocking me when I'm…"

Dr. Drakken sat straight up as some idea replaced his forlorned angst with a growing optimism.

"Wait! That's it!" he said as he stood with vigor. Shego winced as she realized she must have triggered whatever was going on with her boss. _This is why we try to avoid talking to him,_ she scolded herself.

"What's _it_?" she asked before she could bite her tounge. _Hey! What did you just tell yourself?_

"Shego! You're a genius!" he declared as he grabbed her in a rare bear hug. Shego had to resist the urge to blast him across the room.

"You're touching me. Why are you touching me?"

"Come, Shego," the evil genius said after releasing her and heading for the exit. "We have work to do…"

* * *

The last day of school: it ranked right up there with, Christmas, every day of Hanukah, his birthday, Kim's birthday, and the annual Lowerton Cheese Symposium as Ron Stoppable's favorite days of the year. But even as the weather matched the gloriousness of such a day, a small dark cloud followed Ron as he tracked up the path to the Possible's front door. He had felt some guilt for leaving Kim at two in the morning during the homework homestretch, but she reassured him that there was nothing more he could do. He wanted so bad to come through in her time of need, but no serious solutions had come to him as he entered the front door and made his way to the kitchen.

As expected, Kim sat at the breakfast table surrounded by a pile of books and papers writing faster than a hummingbird. Mrs. Dr. Possible watched her with concern from the coffee maker as she poured herself a cup of coffee.

"Hey, K.P.," Ron greeted timidly. "Ready for the last day of class?"

"HeyRonisittimeforschoolalreadyIdidn'tnoticeitwasdaylightdoIhavetimetochangeprobablynotohwellgottagetthisalldone," Kim blurbed.

Not really understanding anything she said, Ron noticed the trash can was full of empty coffee cans. A sideways glance to her mother confirmed, at least in her opinion, she wasn't going to finish in time. Gently, Ron sat down next to his girlfriend and placed his hand over hers. The redhead immediately took umbrage to this interruption to her work.

"Kim, maybe it would be better if…," Ron started softly before the redhead cut him off.

"I. Am. Going. To. Finish," she growled as she looked a hole right through her best friend.

A lesser man would have turned away in ghastly shock. But Ron held tough at the morphed appearance of the girl he had known for the better part of fourteen years. One eye was wide, bloodshot, and obviously tweaked. The other twitched repeatedly; heavy bags had formed under both. Her hair was, in one word, frumpy – random unwashed strands popped out of the ponytail she had it in. And though normally her complexion was good enough such that she didn't have to wear makeup to look her best, Kim was dangerously close to a break out. Despite it all, Ron didn't flinch.

"You got it, K.P.," he said shifting to give her as much support as he could. _If only that stupid grade sheet hadn't been thrown out_, Ron thought as he began helping Kim get her books together. And then it hit him…

--

"Vis isda mos rrrdculs lan uv evr ad!" said Shego muffled by her gas mask.

Her employer balled his hands into trembling fists and grinded his back teeth before turning to address her.

"I told you to take that ridiculous thing off!" he ordered. "I can't understand a word you're saying."

With a groan, the most dangerous woman in the world complied as the overpowering smell of the Tri-City Landfill seeped into her nostrils. Mountains of trash ringed the valleys of sludge and mud as the henchwoman found herself in the last place she wanted to be after breaking out of prison.

"I said," she began with a gag. "This is the most ridiculous plan you've ever had."

"Nonsense, Shego," Dr. Drakken said hopping on a small pile of garbage to survey the layout. "With the number of scientific facilities in the Tri-City area, the amount of high tech components that just get tossed out is enormous! And they all end up here!"

"So?" Shego said suppressing another gag.

"So…?! So, stuff that is thrown out is considered public property. Which means, nobody can stop us from taking as much as we want whenever we want!"

As Drakken began to walk around a bit, Shego had no choice but to follow. Her third step landed her foot in a slimy substance that she was sure would never wash out of her suit. _And I just had it dry cleaned…_

"But this is all busted up junk! None of it works. That's why it was _thrown out!_" she objected.

"Ah, ah!" her boss retorted as he jumped on another pile of garbage and struck a menacing pose. "With my evil genius, I can turn a pile of junk some goody-two-shoes scientist threw out into the means for WORLD DOMINATION!"

The olive-skinned woman allowed a few more seconds of his self-indulgence to pass silently before responding.

"You spent too much time with Lucre in the slammer, didn't you?"

Drakken grunted off the insult as he returned to ground level.

"Nrrr.., come on. I saw a pile over there that looked pretty fresh…"

--

"Ron, this is the most ridiculous plan you've ever had," Wade said through the Wadebot's screen.

Ron did not share that sentiment as he and Rufus jumped off the back of the hover craft at the entrance to the Tri-City Landfill.

"Wade, you're not helping and we don't have a lot of time," Ron pleaded.

"Okay, fine," the boy genius conceded. "Let's just run through the plan one more time: you're going to use your dumb luck…,"

"Ah, ah! Dumb _skill,_" Ron corrected.

"Right…, your dumb _skill_ to find Kim's grade report in the largest trash dump in the state."

"Shh! If you say that's what we're going to do, then you'll jinx us. So that's what we're _not_ going to do!"

Wade locked eyes with Rufus as the naked mole rat and tech guru exchanged confused shrugs.

"This will never work," Wade groaned.

"That's the spirit!" Ron exclaimed as he walked through the landfill's entrance waving for the robot to follow. "Let's _not_ get going!

--

The heat of the day was doing nothing to alleviate the stench from the mounds of garbage as Shego struggled to pull an old car hood that had been flipped over and loaded with various things Dr. Drakken saw potential in. With a final grunt against the rope, the villainess stopped in front of the pile her boss was now sorting through. The evil genius cheerily tossed useless items aside with abandon until something caught his eye. He stopped and stared down for a moment – a sentimental sigh escaped his lips. Picking up the small red toy, he turned to his sidekick.

"Shego, look what I fo…," he said but before he could finish, a pinpoint accurate bolt of plasma disintegrated the 'lil Diablo right out of his hand.

Realizing he was already pressing his luck, he mounted no fuss over the incident and with a barely audible 'grrr!', made his way to another pile of junk. He had barely begun sorting when he spotted something else that excited him - a large piece of the busted neural harmonic compliance ray had managed to survive. Gleefully, Drakken reached down to pick it up but was intercepted by a cockroach the size of a border collie that scooped the device in its mouth.

"Gaaah!" Drakken gasped as he recoiled in shock at the site of such a thing. But when the oversized bug playfully wagged its thorax and indicated that it wanted to play tug-of-war with the busted ray gun, the doctor's disgust shifted to annoyance.

"Give that to me!" the blue-skinned villain declared latching onto the ray and yanking it out of the bug's mouth. "This is key to my plans! Not a chew toy!"

When the mutant roach jumped up Drakken's leg thinking that the game was on, the evil genius swiftly kicked the poor creature away. With a yelp, it tumbled down the pile landing at Ron Stoppable's feet just as the teen hero rounded another pile of garbage.

"Roachie!" Ron shouted happily at the site of his old friend. Roachie did not share the same enthusiasm as he leaped into Ron's arms and furiously clicked away about the injustice he had just received.

"Slow down," Ron said. "I'm a little rusty…"

The conversation continued in 'roach' as boy and bug clicked mandibles back and forth. Ron finally realized what Roachie was trying to tell him and looked up to see a dumbfounded Drakken and disgusted Shego staring at him.

"Is he actually talking to that thing?" Drakken asked wide-eyed. Shego got her bearings much faster.

"Yeah, don't worry about the sidekick showing up to stop us. Let's worry about him talking to a giant cockroach!" Shego yelled dripping every word in sass.

The raven haired woman charged forward hurling a ball of energy straight towards Ron, Rufus, and Roachie. The blonde jumped back in the nick of time and landed on a discarded hubcap - his two animal friends jumped clear in the other direction. As Shego lined up to fire another blast, the Wadebot streaked by him swiftly picking up Rufus and Roachie and extended an arm to Ron.

"Grab on!" Wade shouted. It took Ron no time to comply as he was yanked out of danger just in the nick of time. Wade accelerated his invention and the blonde haired sidekick now found himself riding on the hubcap behind the Wadebot like a water-skier. With a predatory growl, Shego vaulted herself on top of one the massive piles of garbage and gave chase jumping from pile to pile while raining down bolts of plasma that Ron had to frantically dodge.

Ahead of the chase, a large stack of beat up and crushed cars lay directly in the heroes' path. The naked mole rat and mutant cockroach passengers both screamed in panic as Wade commanded the Wadebot to take a sharp right, but Ron was left still heading straight for a nasty collision. Shego spotted her opportunity to cut the teen off and leaped for the stack of cars. Ron let out a startled scream of courage certain of his doom just as the extended arm of the Wadebot cracked him like a whip in the new direction. Ron was pulled into the turn at the last possible second – the bottom of his make-shift wakeboard bounced him off the stack of cars. Groaning and trembling, the tower destabilized. In mid-air, the olive-skinned villainess realized that she was not in for a happy landing. The pile collapsed with the top car pivoting like a baseball bat smacking the woman like a hanging curveball. Shego soared over most of the dump before landing in a particularly foul heap of refuse.

As soon as Wade realized that they were no longer being chased, he slammed the brakes and turned the screen to face Ron who was still barreling at them at full speed. Instinctively grabbing the bottom of the hubcap, Ron jumped over the robot narrowly avoiding a collision as Rufus, Roachie, and even Wade (though safely inside his room) ducked.

"Badical!" the blonde shouted as he stuck the landing. Still moving fairly quickly, he turned his head back to see if his friends were all right as they did the same for him. "Check out my mad garbage surfing skills!"

"Ron! Look out!" Wade shouted after the boy as he hurtled unwittingly towards another mound of filth. Ron swiveled back just in time to do nothing as he plowed into the pile and garbage collapsed all around him.

Rufus and Roachie were first on the scene as the dust settled – the Wadebot right behind – as all three began digging Ron out.

"I think… I busted… my gallbladder," Ron said with a groan as he sat up. Trash trickled off him in every different direction with the exception of a sheet of paper that stuck to his face. The teen hero almost pulled it off and tossed it away before he realized what he held.

"Booyah!" he shouted rapturously jumping to his feet. "Found it!"

"No way!" Wade retorted in disbelief as Ron held the paper up to the Wadebot's camera. Sure enough, it was the missing grade report. "Your plan…, it actually worked…"

"Come on," Ron said as he marched away. "We've got to get this back to the school."

It took Wade a couple seconds to regain his thoughts, but when he did…

"What about Drakken and Shego?" the boy genius asked.

"No time," Ron said without slowing down. "If we don't hurry, Kim will have to go to summer school!"

"Ron, what would Kim do?"

The blonde was halted in his tracks as Wade had trumped his previous points. Ron knew exactly what his girlfriend would expect of him.

"She'd save the world," he conceded before marching back towards the field of battle. "Why do we always _have_ to do the right thing?"

--

Dr. Drakken delicately balanced the last piece of scientific junk on the back of the flying car. The over stacked tower of goods wobbled, but held. With a final pull of rope that had no chance of holding down its load once they got underway, the evil genius wrung his hands in satisfaction. Turning, he found an extremely irate Shego covered head to two in filth – hair frazzled – marching towards him.

"Don't even ask," she swore through her teeth as she made her way to the vehicle. Drakken did his best to contain his laughter as he did the same before a familiar voice stopped them in their tracks.

"Stop right there!" Ron demanded as he stepped out in the open confidently pointing at them.

"Yeah!" Rufus agreed on his owner's shoulder. The two villains looked more annoyed than scared at yet another intrusion by the sidekick extraordinaire.

"Forget it, sidekick! You and what army are going to stop me!" Drakken retorted.

Right on cue, Roachie joined Ron and Rufus and shouted a series of squeaks and clicks. The ground began to rumble as pieces of trash and debris shook from the top of the three mountains of garbage that surrounded Drakken, Shego, and their flying car. Appearing over the crest of each rotting hill, scores upon scores of giant cockroaches all much larger than Roachie appeared like a cavalry ready to attack.

"His giant mutant cockroach army," Shego grumbled. "You had to ask, didn't you?"

Another series of clicks from Roachie sent the 'army' charging down the slopes towards the now hapless bad guys. The force of the shaking was so great, Drakken's pile of pilfered equipment fell apart stopping both him and his sidekick from escaping in their vehicle of choice before it was trampled under the mutant bugs' legs. With no alternative, the two began to run only to be flipped on top of the stampede like crowd surfers at a concert. Ron scooped Roachie from the ground as the Wadebot's extended arms grabbed him and pulled him up above the fracas. As high-fives and handshakes were passed around on the back of the Wadebot, all four allies turned to watch their foes being carried off by Roachie's comrades.

"You will never see a stranger sight," Ron said with all the authority of someone who could make such a statement.

--

At 2:58pm, the office doors to Middleton High School were kicked open by a young woman who bore a striking resemblance to Kim Possible. That is, of course, if she had mutated into some sort of enraged vengeful zombie. Behind her, she dragged an overstuffed duffle bag – loose papers escaping out of the top and leaving a trail. With an enormous heave, the girl flung the bag onto the office counter.

"FINISHED!" she declared as she took massive deep breathes behind a look of righteous determination.

Mr. Barkin, Gladys, Ron, and Rufus all stared back at her in disbelief both sides trying to figure out how to proceed. It was Kim who broke first.

"Ron," the redhead said as she relaxed into confusion. "Why are you here and why are you in mission clothes?"

Ron didn't know where to begin so Mr. Barkin started for him.

"It seems your 'boyfriend'…," Barkin said still not a complete believer himself. "…found your grade sheet so it looks like we won't be needing all that new work you did."

Ron left the computer station and walked over to Kim who was on her third full emotion in less than two minutes – outright shock.

"And what's even better is you made honor role again, K.P.!" he said as he stopped next to her. Though his clothes and face were thoroughly soiled and he smelled a bit ripe, he placed himself in a position for an expectant 'thank you' kiss.

"That's great," Kim said in monotone. "Can't wait to tell my parents…"

With that, the worn out teen hero let her eyes roll back and her knees gave out. Kim fainted backwards succumbing to the exhaustion. Ron quickly caught her and lowered her gently to the ground.

"Kim! K.P.!" he said in a panic kneeling over her. Rufus jumped down and began trying to fan her back to consciousness. Their efforts and concerns went out the window, however, as Kim's mouth cracked open and she began to snore.

_RIIIIIIIIIIIING! _The final bell sounded dismissing the school for summer vacation

"Booyah! In your face!" Ron shouted as he leaped to his feet and pointed at Mr. Barkin.

"In my what?" the educator responded with agitation at Ron's brazen statement.

"You forgot to punish me for the Pop-cheese incident before the school year ended and now I'm in the clear!" Ron boldly said.

"Stoppable," Mr. Barkin said as he made his way over to the student and got directly in his face. "Check your sources a little better next time. Punishments can, and in your case will, carry over to the following year. Keep that in mind while you're enjoying the summer. It may be your last…"

The emotional shock of this bad news coupled with the rest of the stress from the week overwhelmed the poor sidekick as he joined his girlfriend on the office floor in a mass of nerves. Mr. Barkin stood up and straightened his tie in satisfaction. The truth was he had no intention of dolling out any sort of traditional disciplinary action. Keeping the threat of something big over Stoppable's head was more than the former military man would ever need.

Looking down at the now stricken Team Possible lying at his feet, he had another revelation: he had succeeded where super villains and impossible odds had failed; the educator had brought the duo to their knees. The idea brought a smirk to his face and for a brief instant, the thought of world domination crossed his mind. But as he headed out to the hall to make sure the students remained civil in their exit of the building, he decided that educating and keeping high school students in line was far more challenging…

* * *

Kim sat at a lonely table in the library during her study hall hours frantically trying to finish as much homework as she could. Kim's homework sitch had become the buzz of the school in the final week as everyone took sides and placed bets on whether or not she could finish. As it stood now, the odds were 6 to 1 against.

In an adjacent aisle, Ron thumbed along a row of books before finding the title, _Public Relations and You,_ he had been looking for. Pulling it off the shelf, he began to flip through it oblivious to Monique approaching him from behind.

"How's your _girlfriend_ doing?" the future fashion designer asked slyly. Ron spun around in surprise and agitation.

"I AM NOT DEFENSIVE!" he shouted drawing several annoyed looks from the other students. Thankfully, Ms. Hatchet was out of earshot in the back room. Monique giggled at his response – her new favorite game was ribbing Ron about his and Kim's relationship change. Noticing the title of the book he had, she snatched it out of his hands for a closer look.

"I see we're working the public relations front after blowing up that top-secret lab," Monique said waiving the book in Ron's face.

"Ah, man! You heard about that?" Ron asked rhetorically.

"_Image control is key,_" Kim's best girl friend quoted from the book before handing the book back to Ron. "Especially if you go after a third lab this week."

Monique followed Ron as he made his way to the circulation desk. Once there, they both looked at Kim with sympathy.

"Do me a favor," Monique began. "Tell baby-girl to get some sleep."

"One step ahead of you, Monique," replied Ron in an almost secretive tone.

"What do you mean?"

"I taught her a little trick I know," the blonde said rubbing his fingernails against his chest and giving them an ever-so-suave blow. Monique quickly figured out what little trick he was talking about and was horrified.

"Oh no! Not the legendary Ron Stoppable Eyes Open but Still Asleep in Class Technique!" she said with panic.

"The student has become the master," Ron said with a polite Asian style bow.

"Ron! This is bad!" the black haired beauty said as she grabbed him by the shoulders. Her concern finally spread to Ron.

"How bad?" he asked now fearing he had screwed up somehow.

"Very bad. Do you know why I sleep in a separate room when Kim and I have a sleep over?"

--

Kim's English teacher stood in front of the chalkboard diagramming a sentence in review for the final test. The other students marveled at the redheaded cheerleader's ability to stay bright eyed and focused on the lecture under such an enormous burden as hers. That is until her jaw dropped open and a rather obnoxious snore interrupted the lesson…


	6. Amateur Hour

Thanks to MrDrP, creativetoo, Pharaoh Rutin Tutin, kpfan72491, CajunBear73, Magnatron, SxStrngSamurai13, Kimron Posstoppable, Molloy, Stand Alone Battle A.I, Meca Vegeta, Randy C, leadfoot352, Akinyi, RonHeartbreaker, and Danny-171984 for reading and reviewing. All reviews get personalized responses!

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation._

* * *

_Episode 5: Amateur Hour_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

"Fearless Ferret_ fans, you just watched four hours of your favorite _Fearless Ferret_ episodes in a row! What could be better than that…? Watching them all again! The _Fearless Ferret _Fan Favorite Double Marathon starts over now! Only on TV Trash Heap!"_

"Okay, time for a channel change," Kim said out of the side of her mouth.

The redhead was lying on her side across the couch in her living room staring at the flat screen. Ron was seated on the floor using her midriff like a headrest -equally vegetative – with her hand resting on his head occasionally playing with his bangs. The blonde made a rather pathetic attempt to reach the remote that was resting on the coffee table. His hand came within a foot, but no closer. Soon after he gave up, Kim, though much farther away, also made an attempt. But without moving out of the mold she had embedded into the couch, she had less of a chance at finding a different program than he did. The two resigned themselves to another four hours of a man fighting crime dressed as a rodent.

Dr. Angela Possible sighed as she turned from the bottom of the stairs into the living room to see her eldest child and the boy who was practically her third son still glued to the television. Given their rather adventurous extra-curricula's and the fact that it was summer vacation, the brain surgeon was all for them getting a little rest and relaxation. But enough was enough. The Possible matriarch proved that the remote was indeed an object that could be obtained as she used it to switch off the television.

"All right, you two," she said against their grunted objections. "James and I are going to the theater tonight so we'd like you to keep an eye on the twins."

"I'll go get the mind control chips…," Ron started as he stood and stretched. A sharp glance from Kim clued him into his mistake. "…and salsa for the, um, fiesta!"

It was Kim who was on the receiving end of a sharp glance as her mother placed her hands on her hips.

"Kim, what did agree on about…"

"I know. I know," Kim cut her mother off at the mention of Possible Family Safety Rule Number Five. "Only use mind control if the safety of the neighborhood is threatened."

Before her mother could doll out any more admonishments or instructions, a terrifying rumble filled the living room as a small jet fighter with a pink blob at the controls ripped into the room with two similar craft right on its tail. With virtually no time to analyze the situation, Kim, Ron, and Mrs. Dr. Possible invoked Possible Family Safety Rule Number One (when in doubt: Duck!) as they dove under the coffee table.

Rufus checked his six to find Boogey 1 and Boogey 2 still locked on his tail. Alarms flooded his cockpit with warnings of looming missile locks. The naked mole rat made a split second decision and made a sharp turn for the floor lamp. Waiting until the last possible second, he pulled another sharp turn away. Boogey 1 slammed into the lamp shade and was hurled into the kitchen in a spin. Boogey 2 pulled it in just in time to avoid the same fate. The good news for Rufus was he had evened the odds. The bad news was Boogey 2 had a missile lock. Wasting no time, the craft fired. The naked mole rat pushed the yoke into the instrument panel as he made for the deck.

About the same time, Ron lifted timidly out of his duck and cover position and turned to Kim as she did the same.

"What's going on?" Ron shouted over the noise just before his pet flew under the table past his face. Kim giggled as strands of freshly singed blonde hair floated to the floor.

"Nice hair cut," she prodded as the missile flew past her face and singed red hairs dropped to the floor as well.

"Back at you, K.P.," Ron quipped to his less than pleased BFGF.

Rufus knew there was less than two seconds before impact. He had one last desperate ploy as he pulled the stick back and brought his fighter into a huge loop – the missile and Boogey 2 following all the way. As his plane nearly scraped the ceiling, the pink rodent deployed a burst of counter-measures and tightened his loop. Confused, the missile lost tracking at just the right moment and slammed into the ceiling raining down a storm of dust and sheetrock. Unfortunately for Rufus, the explosion forced Boogey 2 to tighten its loop as well placing the foe back on his tail. Leveling off, he spotted Boogey 1 reemerging from the kitchen ready to rejoin the battle with a head-on run for Rufus's jet. In the blink of an eye, the naked mole rat decided on a course of action. Jamming the throttle to the max, he reached back for his ejector seat handle.

The rush of acceleration from Rufus's fighter made it impossible for Boogey 1 to take evasive maneuvers as the two planes slammed into each other in a ball of flame. Boogey 2 tried its best to dodge the debris cloud, but its wing was torn off as it grazed the fireball. The hapless plane impacted with the wall just between a picture of Mr. Dr. Possible and Uncle Slim and a picture of Nana and Kim in combat gi's in another burst of flames and smoke.

Three, more annoyed than terrified, figures climbed out from under their shelter to survey the damage.

"Rufus?" Ron shouted in a concerned tone before spotting his pet floating down in a parachute. The boy extended his hands to form a makeshift landing pad. The naked mole rat made a textbook landing and shed his helmet and chute Kim-style.

"Wicked sick jet fighting skills, little buddy," Ron praised giving the rodent a high five as two identical figures with matching remote controls appeared amidst the smoke and debris.

"Ah, man! Rufus!" Tim shouted as he realized what had happened.

"It took us two weeks to build those things!" his brother Jim finished crouching over the smoking wreckage. Before their shell-shocked mother could completely get a hold of her bearings, her daughter turned to her with a smug teenaged smile.

"So, when exactly is the neighborhood _**not**_ in danger?"

* * *

"Jim, Tim, how many times have I told you no dogfights in the house?" Mrs. Dr. Possible asked of her twin sons. Cradling the ruined remains of their model air force, the two boys just shrugged.

"Actually," their mother said with reflection. "That's the first time. Okay, new rule: No dogfights in the house…"

The carbon copy geniuses wasted no time exiting the room as their older sister and her best friend began to clean up. They were almost in the clear before their father blocked their path to the stairs.

"Boys," Dr. James Possible said in a tone that made his sons stop cold. But rather than punishing them for another expensive project gone badly, he motioned them to observe Kim and Ron. "While your mother and I are out, I want you to keep on eye on those two…"

With the tables turned, the two boys gave their father the 'what's in it for us' stare. _This is the problem with having super-genius offspring_, the rocket scientist thought with a groan.

"…and there _might_ be a batch of experimental rocket fuel on the top shelf of the garage," he conceded.

Jim and Tim dropped their busted jets and sprinted to the garage leaving a "Hicka-bicka-boo? Hoo-sha!" in their wake. James chuckled as his wife joined him in the entry hall. Angela turned to give a last set of instructions to her daughter.

"Kim, there's a twenty on the counter for dinner; make sure the Jim and Tim do their summer reading; and we'll be out late but Ron still has to go home at ten…,"

"But mom," Kim instantly objected to the last item.

"No 'buts', Kimmie," the elder redhead retorted with a motherly smile. "New relationship. New rules."

Kim wrinkled her nose in protest fulfilling her role in the ancient teen/parent battle over boyfriends and curfews. She knew she had no chance of winning. As soon as her parents had sauntered out the front door for a night on the town, Ron walked back in with the twenty dollar bill and the phone book and plopped on the couch. Kim grabbed the phone and joined him fairly snuggly.

"Let's see," the blonde said as he opened up to the restaurants section. "Abe' Ribs…? Too messy. Berta's Norwegian…? Can't put my finger on why, but Eewww! Chinese Lantern Takeout…?"

The slight pause was all Kim needed to confirm the decision as she nimbly dialed the number without even consulting the menu. Ron was suggesting something that _wasn't_ Bueno Nacho and she wasn't going to miss the opportunity for a change.

--

Kim pushed her plate away a bit disappointed that she had eaten more than she wanted. _Could be worse…,_ she consoled herself as she watched three gorging boys and a naked mole rat make short work of the takeout in the formal dining room. If any of them had been less careful, they would have ended up eating part of their chopsticks or a finger or two.

Jim and Tim finished first (or at the same time) just as the family's grandfather clock struck seven. The twins bolted from their chairs in a mad dash to the living room only to be blocked by their equally quick older sister.

"Kim! Move!" Tim exclaimed.

"We're going to miss the start of our new favorite show!" Jim finished. Despite the objections, Kim held her ground.

"Not until you clear your spots like normal human beings," Kim stated authoritatively.

Had she been any other babysitter, she would have been toast. However, a full confrontation with their older sister, who just happened to be Kim Possible, without proper planning and preparation would only mean missing more of their show than they had to. The boys begrudgingly turned around and quickly took their plates into the kitchen. Kim reseated herself to the sound of plate ware hitting the sink with a near shattering clang.

Ron was finished with his main course and began tearing open a fortune cookie. Rufus was busy climbing into the cartons making certain that no morsel went uneaten.

"You are blessed with many special friends," Ron read from the tiny strip of paper that was in his cookie. "These things are so generic," he added flatly as he tossed the fortune back on the table. The blonde quickly found himself the recipient of a pair of insulted looks from his girlfriend and pet.

"I mean…, generically accurate," he tried to correct.

Kim dismissed his little faux pas with a smile as he began cleaning the table. Watching him, she couldn't help think about just how far they'd come. Had anyone told her a couple months ago she'd be head-over-heels for her best friend she would have laughed in their face. Two months after the fact and she couldn't even remember how things were before they started dating. Sure, Kim had to admit that the whole 'dating sitch' was very much a spur of the moment idea, but it took no time at all to find there really was something deeper between them.

At first, it was scary – especially with regards to Ron. Nothing seemed different about him, but it wasn't fair to say he hadn't changed. His new status as _the_ Kim Possible's boyfriend hadn't gone to his head despite the army of Ron wannabe's that flooded Middleton High. His pants were still prone to gravity's whim on missions. And he was still as weird as ever (which Kim was increasingly finding her favorite thing about him). Ron was still Ron. But when she looked hard enough, should spot the changes. He didn't slouch as much – he carried himself with more confidence. He was stepping up on missions going so far as to have pre-planned distractions. And he just seemed more focused – something that was obvious in his grades in the last month of school. It didn't take Kim long to realize that the changes weren't really changes. Ron was just finally living up to the potential she had always seen in him.

Getting back up from the table, Kim leaned in and gave him a peck on the cheek and watched as he blushed before joining in the clean up. Carrying the load to the kitchen, Kim set about washing the dishes as Ron took up the drying station. Though they had done this routine many times before, for the blonde, it was one of many things they did that now felt different. They would stand a little closer; 'bump into' each other a little more; splashing seemed more flirtatious than accidental. It was enough to set Ron into a nervous flutter.

Two months had passed since the prom and Ron still hadn't quite been able to label Kim as his 'girlfriend'. The sidekick found it strange especially since he was the one who had made the first move. Bringing up the list in his mind of exactly what Kim meant to him, words like hero, confidant, ace in the hole, believer, go to gal, and best friend all appeared. But up until this moment, girlfriend wasn't there. However, as they finished up the chore, Kim, for no particular reason, nuzzled up against him as they still stood in the kitchen and it finally became a reality to him. 'Girlfriend' was penciled into the list.

"Ron," Kim said softly. "I was thinking tomorrow, we could get out of here, head up to the lake and have a picnic."

The blonde gulped nervously as he realized these were the situations that black hole expeditions were made of.

"Sure, K.P.," he replied with a small crack in his voice. "Sounds like a great idea."

Kim looked up at him with a smirk realizing she must have gotten him a little riled. Monique had been right on – playing with Ron's hot buttons was too much fun.

"Then it's a date," Kim said before leaning up and giving him another little kiss. Taking his hand, she led him from the kitchen to the living room to join the twins.

"Incoming!" Jim yelled upon seeing the young couple enter. Both boys grabbed tin foil shields and hid behind them.

"What are those?" their sister asked annoyed.

"Kootie shields," Tim responded without showing himself.

"Cool! Do they work?" Ron asked before Kim could give a snarky reply. Rolling her eyes, Kim led her boyfriend to the couch just in time for Jim and Tim's program to come back from commercial.

"_Welcome back to _Lairs_," _announced a typical hip-hop style reality host in front of a very familiar white marbled building. _"The show where we take a look into the wicked cribs of the top super villains! We're here with Professor D to the Mentor in his South Pacific compound. Word up D.?"_

"_Thank-en you having me,"_ Dementor replied courteously as they entered the front gates. Kim and Ron both shot up straight with jaws open in disbelief for a full minute as Dementor gave them an all too familiar tour through the TV screen.

"…_and this iz my private lounge. All in all I think it'z a very chozy spot to relax when I'm not taking over zhe world. Maybe read a book or play some pool…"_

"This is not good," Kim said finally breaking her and Ron out of the trance.

"I know," Ron agreed emphatically before continuing. "What is he thinking with those curtains? They totally clash with his 'Roman Paradise' motif…"

Kim shot him a sideways glance before pulling out the Kimunicator.

"Wade, tell me you're watching this _Lairs _show," Kim said as her tech guru popped on the screen.

"All over it, Kim. And did you guys see those curtains Dementor had? Just awful!" said Wade shaking his head.

"You're telling me!" Ron added to Kim's further annoyance.

"Hello? Boys…, either of you see a problem with glorifying the villain lifestyle? This could be a really bad influence on people," Kim said bringing levity to the situation.

"Like TV ever influenced anybody," Ron scoffed just before Jim and Tim jumped up from the floor.

"Let's go build our own lair!" Tim declared.

"And take over the world just like Dementor!" Jim added. A sharp cough from Kim grabbed their attention.

"Tweebs!" the redhead scolded. "Don't even think about it."

"Kim Possible!?" both boys shouted in unison before making a hasty exit. Their older sister was left to place her head in her hand and rub her temple.

"I'll set up an extra search net to look for copycats and let you know if there are any hits," Wade said getting back to business.

"Please and thank you," Kim said with a groan before shutting down the Kimunicator.

* * *

Lake Middleton State Park, despite being close to town and very much public, was fairly empty for a perfect summer afternoon. A handful of families were gathered at the swimming beach having a barbeque. A couple boaters towed water-skiers around the nearly smooth water. On a secluded bluff at the end of one of the many trails, a scooter was parked next to two teens on a picnic blanket feeling very contented as a naked mole rat scraped every Bueno Nacho wrapper for rogue pieces of cheese.

"So," Kim said nervously.

"Yeah," came Ron's equal jittery response. Though neither one would look the other in the eye, they both knew what they were thinking – and hoping. It wasn't as if they hadn't kissed before; it was just that they hadn't been so alone…

The redhead leaned her shoulder into his causing Ron to tense a bit. For a brief second she caught his eye but she quickly looked away. In the inner workings of Kim's mind, a very prudish looking Kim in a business suit, glasses, and hair pulled back took center stage. _Okay, Kimberly. I know what you're thinking and it's only natural. He _is_ your boyfriend after all. But that's no excuse to go after him like Bonnie would. I trust you'll keep things civil…_ the inner Kim said as outwardly she bit her lip and tried to get a better read on Ron.

Meanwhile, Ron was equally befuddled about he sitch. His inner stage was occupied by a much less prudent figure. _Okay, Stoppable, _his bad boy self said with a grin. _This is it. If you think Kim brought you out here to look at the grass and hold hands, you've got another thing coming. She's begging for you to kiss her. So just go for it! You conquered your fear of monkeys; you can conquer your fear of kissing Kim. Did I just compare kissing your girlfriend to monkeys…? Well, she did turn into a monkey one time… Okay, that was several levels past sick and wrong… Oh! Will you just stop listening to me and KISS HER!_

Not allowing himself to think about it any longer, Ron took a deep breath and, probably moving a bit too quickly, went for it. Kim was not just surprised at the speed at which he locked his lips to hers but that he had finally initiated a kiss on his own. She instantly overlooked those facts as she threw his arms around his neck. Inwardly, prudish Kim gave the young couple a few seconds before speaking up. _All right, that's enough. Don't want to get too carried away. Hello? Are you listening to me?_

Before that particular voice could continue, the stage in Kim's mind morphed into the Middleton High gym as a roaring crowd full of Kim's filled the stands. Sprinting onto the floor, an entire cheer squad led them all in the standard Mad Dog chant with noticeable twist. _Go! Go! Ron! Go! Go! Go! Ron! Go! Go! Ron! Go! Go! Go! Ron!_ they shouted as the more conservative Kim admonished them. Ignoring her, the cheerleaders began to form the show stopping pyramid – each level being built with spectacular jumps and stunts. But just as the final cheer Kim was about to take her place at the top with a dazzling triple flip kick split, she was knocked out of the way as a larger than life Kimunicator landed on the top of the formation and sent the entire pyramid to the ground in a groaning pile.

Kim and Ron each rubbed their foreheads where their skulls had collided. Each had been startled by the chiming of Kim's all purpose handheld, and paid the price for turning towards it at the same time in such close quarters.

Wade was a bona fide twelve-year-old super genius. And he was finally getting out of his room. That did not mean he was any closer to understanding teen dating relationships. A fact he was sorely reminded of as two very irate teen heroes appeared on his computer's screen.

"Well…," Kim almost growled at him before he realized that he called them.

"Sorry guys," Wade said as apologetically as he could without climbing under his desk. "But it looks like the copycats are starting up."

With a couple of taps to his keyboard, a slightly fuzzy transmission came onto the Kimunicator's screen. Looming largely in the frame was a man dressed in armor and a cape. The man seemed fairly muscular with a chiseled jaw line.

"_I am the Duke of Wrath!"_ he began rather thunderously. _"And I am prepared to choke off the world's supply of oil if you don't surrender…"_

"After that it's just a pretty standard list of demands," Wade said cutting off the transmission. Kim sighed heavily at the proposition of fighting a new foe.

"Are you sure this guy's a copycat and not the real deal?" she asked. Wade punched up a freeze frame of the video and zoomed in on the background of one of the lair's windows. In a spot shadow was a set of very hideous and familiar looking curtains.

"Pretty sure," the tech guru said as he returned to the screen.

"ETA on a ride?" asked a disappointed Kim.

"Bernice will be by to pick you up in a couple hours."

"Thanks Wade," Kim replied before shutting off the device. Sulking at the ground, she felt bad not because she had to go chase down another crazed super villain, but because Ron had finally made a move! And not just a move, but a world class knock-your-socks off kind of move. It just wasn't fair that his moment was cut short and they had to get ready for their ride in a… _Couple hours?_ Kim suddenly realized. Wade was obviously making up for his intrusion. Maybe she could steal some of Ron's thunder back for him…

"Now, where were…," Kim began coyly intending to pull him back into a kiss, but it was Ron who struck before she could finish. The redhead had no choice but to go along as Ron was showing off his newfound boldness around her. In the gym, half the cheer Kim's led one side of the crowd in a chant of _"Boo!"_ while the other half responded with _"Yah!"_

"_You're all a bunch of heathens!"_ a frazzled conservative Kim announced before storming out of the gym.

--

A mustached painter in coveralls hung a "Wet Paint" sign on the wall as he finished up his job. Looking over at the large man in a cape pacing back and forth who insisted he paint the walls beige, he decided he would invoice him for the job later and left with his gear.

The Duke of Wrath was wearing out a spot on the control level of his new lair occasionally grumbling and causing his henchmen to swing wide of him. As he looked up at the clock for the umpteenth time, a hapless employee walked too close to him and was grabbed by the front of his light blue uniform into the face of his angry boss.

"Why hasn't the world surrendered to me yet?!" the super villain wannabe demanded. The unfortunate henchman could only stutter in terror before being saved by a rather unlikely source.

"Ooh! Ooh! I know!" Ron said with his hand in the air like a student in school. The Duke and his henchman turned to see a young man neither of them could remember working there before. "Because no self-respecting world leader is going to surrender to a rookie. You gotta start out small. Earn their fear and respect. You know, conquer a street corner and then work your way up. You can't just grande size the naco platter the first time out…"

After a stunned moment, the villain dropped his henchman and took a menacing step towards the sidekick.

"How dare you call me a rookie, boy!" he grizzled.

"Oh, please. Everything about you screams 'rookie'," Ron countered unfazed. "Duke of Wrath? That doesn't exactly roll off the tongue. You painted your lair beige. Total evil 'no'. You put your henchmen in a non-threatening light blue and…," Ron continued as he held out a finger for each item before leaning in quietly and adding: "…those curtains didn't work for Dementor. Why'd you think they'd work for you?"

The Duke was almost completely blinded by his rage. His metal gloves scraped as his fists tightened. His jaw jutted and his teeth were bared.

"You...! You...!" was all he could growl as he continued to stare down the smug faced teenager in front of him.

"Um, sir," piped a timid looking henchmen from behind. "I have to agree with him."

The evil owner of the lair slowly turned to face his boldly cowering employee.

"What did you say?"

"Um, I think he's right."

Ron leaned around and spoke, "About the uniforms or the curtains?"

"Well, both..."

"Silence! You're going to pay for your insults," the Duke growled as he began to move towards the blonde. "You will rue the day you mocked me. I am going to destroy you!"

"Yeah, totally your first day," Ron scoffed. "You're not supposed to threaten _me…"_

Ron's brashness again made the villain pause as he found his statement almost humorous.

"And why not?"

"Because 'A': that's going to get you into a lot of trouble. And 'B': I'm just the distraction."

"Distraction?" the Duke asked in confused anger. "For what?"

Ron motioned the Duke to look over his shoulder just in time for a size seven boot to plant itself just below his chest armor knocking the villain over the railing to the second level below. Kim made a graceful landing next to her boyfriend and retracted her grappling gun. As henchmen swarmed in from every entrance ready to fight, Kim gave a small peck on Ron's cheek before jumping into the middle of a pack of bad guys ready to fight.

"So, who here's new to the whole 'take over the world' thing?" she asked with sass as a less experienced bad guy paid the price for charging out of formation.

Ron blushed as usual but only because Kim had never done that on a mission before. Rufus had to grab his attention as two hulking henches closed in on him from either side. With only a minor shriek, Ron hit the deck just in time for one of the bad guys to swing over him and punch out the other attacker. Confused at this turn of events, the first henchmen never saw the jump kick Ron delivered that sent him sprawling into the wall. The sidekick looked over his handiwork and allowed himself a little celebratory dance only to be confronted by another big baddie ready to crush him into oblivion. But before he could run away or be pummeled into mush, the new attacker was knocked off his feat by a forth henchmen who had been ejected from the ruckus surrounding Kim.

Looking over to where his best friend was currently dispatching the Duke's men with ease, Ron decided it was time to head for his next objective. Sliding down the handrail to the lower level, he ran up to a large bank of controls, one of which he was supposed to use to turn off the lair's power core. Neither he nor Rufus could figure out which one to switch and after a moment of contemplation just shrugged at each other. With no real plan in mind, Ron took a couple steps back before launching a spinning kick into the middle panel. The panel exploded in a shower of sparks causing Ron to have to shield himself. A loud hum filled the lair before all the lights and equipment shut down leaving only the light from the windows.

"Booyah!" Ron shouted with a fist pump. His celebration was cut short as the Duke of Wrath stepped forward with a very perturbed look on his face.

"And now to face your doom!" the villain sneered before two loud thuds came from the level above them. Two more henchmen bounced to the floor on either side of them followed by Kim landing between the Duke and Ron.

"What did Ron say about threatening him?" Kim asked as she took a battle stance.

--

Another brilliant sunset filled the sky over Lake Middleton as two figures floated down to the ground. Kim landed with her typical grace a few dozen feet from Ron's abandoned scooter and began getting out of her chute. Ron aimed for a spot near her but a last second gust of wind carried him towards his vehicle. He didn't even bother to scream as the collision loomed. As expected, he hit the scooter at the same time as he landed and was sent into a tumble. His chute fell all around leaving only a couple bumps for Kim to look at.

"Remind me to sign you up for a remedial skydiving class," Kim quipped as she finally worked her way to a tangled Ron underneath the canopy. Ron was not amused as he was trying to work his way out of a mess of knots.

"Be out in just a sec, K.P.," he replied to no avail.

"Here, let me help," Kim replied as she climbed though the maze and stood next to him.

"I've got it..."

"Here, just pull your arm..."

"No, that's my leg."

"I meant your other arm, Ron."

"Wait, I've almost got it."

"No, you don't."

"Okay, well pull that cable..."

"That's not going to help."

"Yes, it is... Ow! Ow! Ow!"

"Told you."

"Hold on, maybe if I..."

"No, don't pull that."

"It's cool, Kim."

"You're gonna...,"

"Ha! I mean uh-oh."

"Wait, Ron...,"

"No, it's okay..."

"Ron, really, wait. Ron!"

A large mass of fabric, rope, and teen hero fell over and rolled down the hill towards the beach coming to a rest in a clump just at the edge of the sand. A second later, the scooter slid to a stop next to them.

Under the chute, Ron was laying flat on his stomach tangled worse than before. Kim was equally knotted lying on her back on top of him.

"Make that intro to skydiving," Kim said with a snort.

Rufus, being awoken by the fracas, popped out of his pocket to see his two humans tied up worse than if they had been captured. Springing into action, the naked mole rat stretched his jaw like a sprinter stretching his legs and began chomping through the ropes. In no time, the blonde and redhead were free from their bounds and Ron set about cleaning up the remains of his parachute.

Taking a look at the sunset, Kim decided there was a better use of his time and pulled him down to the beach.

"Now, where were we?" Kim asked for a second time that day. Ron was really starting to like those words as they joined in an embrace.

"I think we were just about…," he said pulling closer to her when…

_Beep-beep. Ba-beep._

The sound made shoulders sag and anticipatory mouths frown. With another groan, Kim answered the call.

--

"You can't stop me! I'm the All Mighty Invent_or!_" cackled an almost frail middle-aged man in a '60s styled retro costume. Kim and Ron were on the other side of the similarly styled room not entirely focused on his rant.

"Definite style points for the interior decorating," Ron said as he looked around the lair.

"But points off for execution," Kim said as she watched three hulking robots obviously built from designs from when her parents were still in diapers stalk in their direction. She tied her hair back in a pony tail before reaching for the Kimunicator.

"Hey Kim," Wade greeted. "You almost done? Your next rides almost there…"

"No, he just finished ranting. Can you do a quick tech scan for me?"

"Sure," the boy genius said as Kim held up the device towards one of the robots. A green scanning laser quickly probed the threat. After a couple seconds, Wade returned his analysis.

"They've got a hydraulic line popping out the back of their necks. Cut it and they're out of commission."

"Thanks Wade. As always, you rock," said Kim as she pocketed the blue handheld and limbered up.

"Um, you need me for anything, Kim?" Ron asked almost as an afterthought.

"Just make sure 'Mr. All-Mighty' doesn't do anything stupid," the teen hero said before sprinting forward and jumping on the back of one of the robots.

As Ron corralled the poor man, the would be villain could only watch in shock as a cheerleader took out his invincible robot army as easily as if she were planning her squad's next routine.

--

Slits of light slashed across Kim's face as she peered down through the vent to confirm she was in the right spot. Seeing the Portable Seismic Generator on a secured platform below her, she knew she was in the right spot. As right as being in the air duct of yet another upstart copycat villain's lair waiting for her boyfriend and sidekick to launch his distraction could be. Before she could think about other things, the Kimunicator silently buzzed her.

"Wade," Kim started quietly. "Please tell me you have a break in sight."

"Sorry Kim," Wade replied sympathetically. "But how do you feel about going to Madrid, Toronto, and Tulsa?"

"Oh," Kim grumbled. "Can't we give some of the overflow to Global Justice?"

"Actually, this is _their_ overflow…"

The news took a little air out of Kim.

"Fine, just line up the rides," she ordered before ending the transmission.

With a sigh, Kim leaned her head against the side of the duct and closed her eyes. Soon more pleasant images filled her vision. The darkness in the gym was broken up by the light bouncing off the disco ball. Other couples danced around her but she couldn't make out who they were. A blonde haired boy with freckles and a powder blue tux took her hand and twirled her slowly around the dance floor. Then they stopped and looked at each other lovingly. They drew closer to each other each knowing what they were about to do but just before they kissed, the boy spoke softly.

"What do you mean you don't have a snack machine?"

Kim's eyes darted open as that was definitely not how that memory was suppose to go. Her confusion was ended as the voice continued through the vent.

"You mean to tell me," Ron said dramatically as he continued his distraction. "That you guys built this place out in the middle of nowhere and didn't think to put in a snack machine?!"

Shaking herself back into focus, Kim opened the vent cover and hooked the grappler onto the side before lowering herself to the floor below.

--

An abandoned arborarium now served as the latest villain's 'lair'. The darkened interior cast many shadows over the central path as two figures slowly made their way in. Ron followed just behind Kim as he tried to work out a knot in one of her aching shoulders.

"Little to the left," Kim said as Ron complied. A rustle in the foliage to their right brought them to full attention as the lights flashed on. "Stay sharp," the redhead ordered as each teen took a fighting stance.

The bushes continued to rumble before producing what, at first, appeared to be a menacing dark red figure. But on a second examination…

The last four and a half days had been nothing but ridiculous upstart villain after ridiculous upstart villain all chasing their chance to be noticed and featured on television. However, the pale, overweight man in a barely adequate spandex costume complete with monkey ears and tail finally caused the teen heroes to lose it. The man was more than thrown off by the waves upon waves of laughter Kim and Ron shared as tears pooled in their eyes and they clutched their guts in pain. Even Rufus was doubled over with the giggles. Slowly getting a measure of control over himself, Ron produced a pen and a clipboard.

"Okay…," he started still with an intermittent laugh. "Give us your name, plan for world domination, and evil catch phrase."

The rotund monkey suited man hesitated before answering not certain what the questions and their hysterical outburst amounted to.

"I am the Crimson Chimpanzee and…," he replied but could not go further as a second wave of laughter erupted from the teens. Kim and Ron had to hold each other up before it was through. Even then, they still didn't have complete control.

"Thanks, I needed that," Kim chuckled as she wiped a tear out of her eye. Tossing the Kimunicator to her surprised partner, she turned to leave. "He's all yours Ron. Show him what Mystical Monkey Power can do. I'll be outside if you need me…"

The teen heroine continued to giggle and laugh all the way out the exit leaving the two men to settle the score. Ron turned back to his new foe enthusiastic about being allowed to call the shots only to find him looking at him with reverence.

"Did she say 'Mystical Monkey Power'?" the Crimson Chimpanzee asked trembling.

"As a matter of fact she did," Ron stated as he felt he had the upper hand.

"Then that means," he said suddenly falling to his knees at Ron's feet – something the sidekick was not expecting. "That means you're Lord Monkey Fist!"

"Well, actually," Ron tried to correct as all his confidence evaporated into to thin air.

"You look different than your photos – less hairy - and younger. All my life I've wanted to be just like you! Oh, please teach me! I'll be your loyal servant! I'll do anything! Anything!" the simian fanatic pleaded. Ron could only look skyward as he grumbled.

"I'm still counting this as a win…" he said to Rufus.

--

James Possible finished putting the lawnmower in the garage before strolling out to look at his handiwork. The lush green lawn was certainly up to his standards but more importantly, the neighborhood association's contest standards. James waved at the other neighbors who also happened to be working in their yards as children laughed and played games. The scene could have been a Norman Rockwell painting had it not been for the Global Justice Jump Jet that came to a hover over the Possible residence.

Kim and Ron stumbled down the exit ramp before giving the pilot a wave. The jet roared away leaving the two teens to collapse onto the soft green grass. Kim's father approached the two taking notice of the heavy bags under each of their eyes and their over all exhausted demeanor.

"Say! I recognize you! Aren't you my daughter?" James joked at Kim's absence during the past week

"Ha! Ha!" Kim flatly said without opening her eyes.

"Bad guys got you two on the run, huh?"

"Actually, I think a few of them were girls," Ron responded.

"They just keep coming and coming," Kim said as she opened her eyes and stared at the sky. "I feel like I'm a soccer goalie trying to fend off an entire team by myself…"

Kim's father rubbed his chin in thought.

"You know," the Possible patriarch said. "This reminds me of when I was coaching your brothers' on their soccer team. They never quite grasped the concept of defense, but that never stopped them from scoring. Possibles play offense…"

Kim sat up as her tired mind attempted to piece together what her father was talking about. Luckily she got the message and got to her feet with a smile and a new plan.

"Thanks, daddy," Kim said with a hug to the old man.

"Glad to help," he replied.

"Come on, Ron," Kim ordered helping her groaning best friend to his feet. "We've got a favor to cash in…"

* * *

The office of Stewart Seedy was a large round and opulently appointed room full of pictures of top recording artist, gold and platinum records, and shelves upon shelves of awards. Kim took it in with reserve – her star fever had been alleviated over the last couple of years. Ron's was far from cured as he hurried from picture to picture narrating as he went.

"Kim, look!" the blonde almost yelled settling in front of one particular photo. Kim obliged and walked over to join him in front of the picture. "It's you doing backup vocals for Britina at Orphan Aide last year after her singers got laryngitis!"

"Yeah, I remember, Ron. It was no big," she humbly said.

"But look in the corner," her boyfriend pleaded. "That's me!"

Kim took a second look at the picture and had to squint. After moving closer and tilting her head, she figured out what she was looking at.

"Ron, that's an amplifier with one of Britina's wigs on top of it…"

Ron too was forced to examine the photo closer. As his enthusiasm faded, he was about to object but a different question came to his mind.

"Wait…, Britina wears a wig?!"

Before the redhead could fill him in with that particular story, the office doors burst open as a mass of young business professionals orbited the older, well-styled music and television mogul still wearing his signature dark aviator shades. Each assistant was either on a palm pilot, cell phone, or furiously scribbling notes.

"Mr. Seedy, what about your three o'clock?" one assistant asked.

"Move it to three-o-five," Mr. Seedy replied.

"The marketing department needs you to approve Dexter's concert tour posters by this weekend," harped another.

"Have them send everything to my beach house… No - my mountain retreat. I'll look at them there."

"Mr. Seedy, your wife's on line two," a third assistant said bringing the entire confab to a screeching halt. Each of the other underlings looked at the young man in horror as their boss stared straight ahead with a semi-scowl.

"I'll take a message," the wayward assistant said allowing everyone to let out a sigh of relief. With the situation diffused, Mr. Seedy stepped out his moving conference and turned his attention to Kim.

"Kim Possible! And friend… What a pleasure!" the entertainment mogul said as he reached to shake the heroine's hand.

"Thanks for seeing us on such short notice, Mr. Seedy," Kim reciprocated.

"Nonsense. Anything for the girl who saved last year's broadcast of the Television and Music Awards."

"It was no big," came Kim's standard response.

"But the transmission tower with that bird's nest we had to move was…," Ron said shivering as he recalled the incident.

"What can I do for you, Ms. Possible?" Seedy asked.

"Well, it's about this _Lairs_ show on your network," Kim started.

"Our top rated program!" the older man exclaimed pointing to a computer screen with the current TV ratings. "Would you like a guest spot?"

"Actually, we'd like you to take it off the air," the cheerleader requested shocking Mr. Seedy and his cohorts.

"What?! Why?" the business asked.

"Well, you see, it encourages people to try to be like the other super villains so they can get on the show. I mean, trust me, none of them are taking over the world anytime soon, but they are putting themselves and everyone around them in danger," Kim said stating her case.

"Plus, Kim and I could use the rest," Ron added.

"I…, I," stammered the music executive. "I couldn't even think of it."

"But…,"

"I'm sorry, Kim. But the network board would laugh me out of the room if I tried to cancel it. And they'd keep it going anyway."

Kim was about to continue her protest but the Kimunicator chimed in.

"Go Wade," Kim said expecting him to report on another new villainous upstart.

"I'm getting some strange energy readings from an abandoned factory outside Middleton. I think it may be a new lair springing up," Wade replied confirming the teen hero's suspicions.

"We're on it," Kim groaned pocketing the handheld. "Thanks anyway, Mr. Seedy," she added before heading out the door with Ron.

--

Kim crouched through the side window and deposited herself on the catwalk high above the factory's floor. Ron entered right behind with a much less gracious clang. Kim gave him a look that implied he should be quieter. The duo looked around the sparsely appointed 'lair'. Unlike so many of the others they had been in, there were no bustling henchmen going from one panel of controls to another. No giant screen with the evil logo or map of the world. Nothing much of anything except a few tools, some spare parts, and a rocket letting off steam on a launch pad. Kim and Ron looked at each other with confusion not expecting the situation they had encountered before looking back to the projectile.

"Does that design look familiar to you?" Ron asked.

As Kim was about to respond, a side door to the darkened factory swung open and two identical looking pre-teens walked in one carrying curtain rods; the other carrying an ugly yet very familiar roll of fabric. Ron couldn't believe the turn of events he had just witnessed and looked to Kim for comment but instead saw something more terrifying than a dozen monkey ninjas closing in on him. The last time he saw Kim with that expression on her face, she was throwing an entire hot dog cart at him shouting 'Ron Heartbreaker'. At least the blonde knew she wasn't mad at him this time…

"TWEEBS!" Kim screamed at the top of her lungs. Jim and Tim instantly dropped what they were carrying and froze – neither one wanting to look up at their enraged sister above.

--

"Boys, how could you?!" Mrs. Dr. Possible scolded her two sons. The boys sat at the kitchen table with heads hanging as their parents loomed over them – Kim stood in the doorway still in her mission togs arms folded. "Your sister risks life and limb to stop people like Dr. Drakken from doing what you just tried to do!"

"Not only that," her husband added with a scowl looking over their plans. "But your thrust to weight ratios are way off."

Kim's mother gave a sharp elbow into Jame's side to remind him of the seriousness of the situation. Knowing not push his luck, he refocused on the task at hand.

"Um, right. What you boys did was wrong. And there will be consequences – _serious_ consequences."

Satisfied that things were going to be taken care of, Kim made her way back to the living room where Ron was taking advantage of the break to watch some television. As she joined him on the couch, she did a double-take when she realized what show he was watching.

"…_and this brings us to the underground grotto,"_ Señior Senior, Sr. smoothly said as the camera scanned the dark, wet cave. "_Perfect for keeping our getaway boats and our giant squid."_

"Ron!" growled Kim. "After all we've been through this week, you're watching the show that caused it all?!"

The blonde recoiled a bit not wanting to give an answer but he tried anyway.

"The Seniors are on this week and I wanted to see if they, um, mentioned me…"

Kim rolled her eyes as she picked up the remote to change the channel, but stopped as she listened to the announcer take over.

"_That's the show for today, but jump back here tomorrow night for a special live episode from Motor Ed's junkyard for a special tour and live concert from his rock band, Masters of Mayhem. If you're going to be in the Jersey area, get your tickets now! Peace!"_

As the shows credits rolled, Kim slowly began to grin as a new plan began to take shape.

"Live concert at Motor Ed's?" she asked rhetorically.

"You know," Ron began thinking the opposite of his girlfriend. "That could be a pretty good concert. Think Wade could score us tickets?"

"I've got a better idea," Kim said as she pulled out the Kimunicator.

--

"Now we're in the main garage," the mullet-headed cousin to Dr. Drakken said as a number of his lackeys and a full film crew followed him. "This is where we seriously trick out our rides and stuff, seriously."

As the tour continued, two young production assistants in 'film crew' hats tried to look as much a part of the show as possible. Noticing the doorway leading to where the concert stage was being setup, the one with a red pony tail coming out of the back of her cap steered the other away from the camera crew and towards the stage.

--

The crowd was getting raucous and loud waiting for Motor Ed's band to take the stage that had been erected amongst stacks of old smashed cars in a New Jersey junk yard. The crowd roared as the host of _Lairs _grabbed the microphone.

"And now," he shouted into the mic as the crowd reached a fevered pitch. "You've been waiting for them all day. They're ready to shred their guitars like they shred the road, the Masters of May-Hem!"

The surging mass exploded as Motor Ed and his lackeys appeared on stage and grabbed their instruments – Ed in the lead singer position.

"Hello, New Jersey!" Ed yelled with both fist pumped in the air. "Seriously, you guys ready for some serious rocking?"

The crowd gave an emphatic yes as he signaled his band to start rocking out. The Masters of Mayhem opened with a thundering rock ballad each musician self-absorbed in their own performance. So absorbed, they failed to notice the redheaded blur that swung from the stage rafters and knocked their mullet-haired lead singer off the front of the stage. The fans in the mosh-pit cleared a space letting Motor Ed land flat on his stomach.

Kim landed where Ed had been playing as the band came to a screeching halt. Ed rolled over and got back to his feet as he faced Kim.

"I have to admit, Motor Ed, that kinda' rocked," Kim said with her trademark heroic banter. "But now it's time for you to roll."

"Seriously, what's your harsh, Red?" Motor Ed fired back. "I haven't committed any crimes... recently."

"Against society, maybe not. But against fashion, definitely."

"Oh, that better not have been a knock on the mullet. Boys! Show Red here what we do to gate crashers the don't pay the cover!"

The Masters of Mayhem charged Kim using their instruments as weapons. The crowd, thinking that they were getting a stunt show as well, only cheered louder. The bass guitarist swung hard, but Kim easily ducked grabbing the neck of the guitar. With a quick punch to his jaw, she relieved him of his instrument/weapon and sent him stumbling back into an amplifier. Wielding the bass like a battle ax, Kim smashed it into the gut of the next attacker taking him and the drummer out of the fight. The redhead added a roundhouse kick to the lead guitarist, who was trying to sneak up from behind with his guitar raised over his head, sending him flying into the keyboards.

Forced into action, Motor Ed seized the mic stand and charged. A well-placed kick knocked the weapon out of his hands as he pressed his attack. Kim used his momentum to sling the disgraced engineer face first into the soundboard rendering him out for the count. With the Masters of Mayhem neutralized, Kim launched into part 'B' of her plan.

"Ron, show time!" she called out. Ron jumped onto to stage and grabbed one of the _Lairs _TV cameras off its operator's shoulder.

"Need to borrow this, dude," he said as he mounted the camera and framed up Kim. "All right, you're on!"

"Hi! In case you didn't know, I'm Kim Possible," the redhead said authoritatively into the camera before Ron stopped her and pointed the camera at the ground.

"Okay, cut! That was good, K.P., but give us a little fire in this next take."

"Ron," Kim groaned back. "We're live. There are no 'takes'."

"Well, then don't let me stop you!"

"I wasn't… Whatever…," Kim stumbled a bit before refocusing on her speech. "Tonight's little demonstration was for all of you who think building your own lair and becoming a super villain is cool. Well, not on my watch. If you want to it give a try, you'll have to take me on, and let me tell you, I've faced far worse than what any of you could come up with. But if being foiled by a teen hero cheerleader is your thing, then we've got plenty of comfy prison cells just waiting for you…"

--

The flickering light of the television provided the only light in the mildew stained walls of Dr. Drakken's lair. The blue-skinned villain sat on the couch alone consuming a TV dinner. He stared at a screen that featured a full headshot of his teenaged foe.

"Now, why didn't any one tell me that _before _I signed up to take over the world?" a soured face Drakken huffed.

--

"…_Then we've got plenty of comfy prison cells just waiting for you…"_

Mr. Seedy stopped the tape of the disastrous _Lairs _live concert and turned to his team of assistants.

"Okay, so all the major sponsors have pulled out and the show is cancelled. We need a replacement pronto. Ideas?" he said looking for someone to come up with something.

"How about a show about people getting revenge on their grade school bullies?" a first assistant tried.

"I like it, but I used to be a bully in school. So, no. Next?"

"What about following struggling garage bands trying to make it big?" another tossed out.

"No good. We already have too much crummy music on our channel. Anything else?"

"Well, I was looking at the focus group numbers for the end of the last episode and found something that got positive eyeball response from the viewers," a last assistant said nervously.

"Really," Mr. Seedy said with curiosity. "What exactly did they like?"

--

Ron parked his scooter at the end of the trail at Lake Middleton on another fantastic summer day. He and Kim got off and began to stroll down towards the lake shore happy and relaxed.

"So, Wade is sure the copycat sitch is over?" Ron asked hand in hand with Kim.

"Yep," Kim said stopping them at a suitable spot. "The site's been clear for a couple days. I think they all got the message. Now, where were we?" she asked coyly.

"Well, for starters, I think I was standing a little closer," Ron said getting the gist of where Kim was going. "And your arms were around my shoulders."

"Like this?" the cheerleader inquired as she draped her arms around him.

"I think so," the blonde replied pleased.

"What else?" Kim prodded.

"And I think I was leaning in like this," Ron replied bringing himself almost nose to nose with his best friend.

"And?" she said daring him to keep going as she closed her eyes in anticipation.

"And…," he continued before a movement in the bushes behind Kim caught his eye. Kim was left breathlessly waiting as Ron tried to figure out what he was looking at. "…and…, why is there a film crew following us recording everything we're doing?"

Kim spun around to see what Ron was talking about. Sure enough, there were two or three cameras with their support crews trying their best to hide in the bushes or behind the trees. With his subjects now aware of their presence, the director stepped forward.

"Sorry about startling you two," the man said extending his hand. "Jerry Goldstein, director."

"O…kay," Kim almost muttered as she weakly shook the man's hand. "Why are you filming us?"

"It's for a new show called _Teen Heroes: Real Lives._ You guys are going to be the pilot episode. Just go back to doing what you were doing and pretend like we're not even here."

The young couple stared silently at one another for a moment. Kim was making no effort to disguise her annoyance at yet another interruption to their plans, but it was Ron who stepped forward.

"All right, let's get one thing straight," Ron said seriously. Kim had to smile as it appeared her man was taking charge of the situation and defending their privacy. "The name is Stoppable. Ron Stoppable. R-O-N-S-T…"

Kim could only hang her head with a sigh as her boyfriend made the director get a pen and write down his name letter for letter…


	7. Return to Yamanouchi, Part I

Thanks to Comet Moon, TheBaldOneMpls, Pharaoh Rutin Tutin, daywalkr82, Stand Alone Battle A.I, Molloy, Isamu, korovan, Magnatron, CajunBear73, Akinyi, Randy C, RonHeartbreaker, Danny-171984, and XyKPfan for reading and reviewing. They all know what it's like to get a special thank you from yours' truly.

Now, it's time for some smack-monkey! Enjoy!

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation._

* * *

_Episode 6: Return to Yamanouchi_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

_The cold chill of the mountain air was sharpened by a bitter wind rushing down from the peaks above. A small round figure carefully made his way across the courtyard surrounded by several humble pagodas. Keeping a tight grasp of his cloak to keep as warm as possible, the small man entered one of the buildings._

_Once inside, the man carefully hung up his cloak revealing his status as a monk. In the middle of the room in front of a small fire sat a powerful man in full Samurai armor. His eyes were closed in meditation only opening once the monk sat down across from him. The monk sat ready with a feather pen and a scroll. The pair exchanged respectful bows before the warrior spoke._

"_This is the prophecy of Toshimiru, Master of the Mystical Monkey Power, forger of the Lotus Blade, and founder of Yamanouchi…" he said in a deep mystical voice. The monk began to transcribe every word – his master talking slowly and assuredly. Soon the scroll was full and the warrior drew his sword from his side and placed its tip in the fire. The monk rolled the scroll placing a thick ring of wax around the middle and held it out before him. Taking the sword out of the fire, the warrior touched the red hot glowing end to the wax. As he did, the sword came alive in a bright blue light that soon enveloped the scroll, the two men, and then, the room…_

* * *

Valuables and artifacts filled display case after display case. Katanas, ninja stars, smoke pellets, battle helmets, monkey idols, and hundreds of other priceless oriental objects were awaiting their public debut; including a small scroll with a monkey seal on it in a forgotten corner of the display.

On the other side of the curtain keeping the items hidden before being revealed to the assembled public and press, the museum's curator nervously looked to his assistant who finally signaled him that all was ready.

"Ladies and gentlemen, members of the press," the curator began. "We are proud to present this exhibit in conjunction with the Japanese Museum of History and Antiquity for the first time in the United States. We would ask that you not use flash photography or to handle any of the items due to their delicate nature. And now, it gives me great pleasure to present to you _Ancient Secrets of Tai Shing Pek Kwar!_"

With a ceremonious tug of a rope, the assistant pulled the curtains back. The crowd gasped as cameras clicked furiously. However the gasp was not at the splendor of the collection, but rather the refined but brutish looking man in a black gi standing before it. The man's scowl was enough to make the museum curator take a couple steps back in shock as two figures jumped to the front of the crowd.

"Lord Monkey Fist," began the girl of the pair. "Only you would be so bold."

"Whatever you are planning, you will not succeed," added the young man next to her.

"Spare me the heroic banter," Fist replied with a disgusted sigh. With a snap of his fingers, monkey ninjas descended from the ceiling sending the crowd into a panicked frenzy for the exits. The pint-sized warriors paid them no mind and instead, focused their attack on the two teenagers with a swarm of fur, fists, and tails.

The former English lord grinned baring his sharpened incisors as his foes were completely occupied by his warriors. Turning his attention to the artifacts, he quickly spotted what he was looking for – the scroll. His monkeylike hand hovered over it for a brief second - hesitant to actually touch it - before reverently picking it up. Slowly, Monkey Fist began his evil cackle before bringing it to a fevered pitch.

"Finally, with the prophesies of Toshimiru in hand, my destiny as the Supreme Monkey Ruler will be revealed to the world!" he ranted holding the scroll overhead.

Catching the villain's triumphant pose from the corner of her eye, the young woman knew she had to get to him. As she ducked a flying kick from a monkey ninja, she seized its tail as it flew by. Swinging it around like a whip, she hurled him towards another wave of attackers clearing them out like bowling pins. With a clear path to Fist, she wasted no time charging him.

Despite being wrapped in self-delusion, Monkey Fist's saw the heroine's charge. Quickly, he grabbed the smoke pellets from the display and threw them at the ground. The two-thousand year old relics worked as if they were new filling the room with a dense gray smoke. Without being able to see, the young woman pulled up her attack in a fit of coughing. Almost as quickly as the smoke came, it cleared away revealing the girl and the young man alone in the middle of the room.

"Hirotaka, are you okay?" Yori asked of her partner. The young ninja student dropped out of his fighting stance.

"I am fine," he replied in his usual even demeanor. With an almost unnoticeable sigh, Yori turned her attention to the display as the curator and his assistant emerged from their hiding spots under one of the tables.

"Call the police immediately!" the curator, still coughing, ordered his assistant.

"That will do you no good," Hirotaka stated matter-of-factly joining the other three in front of the spot where the scroll had been.

"There is only one person who can stop Monkey Fist now," Yori said seriously. The curator looked confused for a moment before he thought he knew who she was talking about.

"Ah, Kim Possible!" he declared.

"No," came Yori's quick response.

"No?!" curator and assistant asked dumbfounded.

"No," Yori affirmed. "But she is our contact."

Completely befuddled that the world famous teen hero would not be the one to stop Fist and recover the scroll, the two exchanged very confused glances before the curator asked for clarification.

"Contact…? To who?"

--

Ron Stoppable's fingers quivered over the packet of Diablo sauce like a gunslinger's. Eyes twitched as they locked onto his foe. The naked mole rat standing on the table across from him flicked his whiskers back at the teen as his paw hovered over his own stack of Diablo sauces. In a booth on the other side of the restaurant, a young boy stared in awe at the showdown before his mother covered his eyes and whisked him out the door. Neither side budged as a crumpled up chimerito wrapper tumbled its way between them.

Kim sat trapped against the window on Ron's side of the booth watching the display of macho will power play itself out. Monique, too, was watching but had the freedom to leave if she desired. However, she remained praying that what she thought was about to happen didn't. The redhead realized that she was a part of it whether she wanted to be or not, but the sooner she fulfilled her small role, the sooner it would be over.

"Draw," Kim said flatly. In a flash, both human and mole rat grabbed a packet of Diablo sauce and emptied it onto a bite sized section of the burritos that were also in front of them. As expected, each took a bite and repeated the process with another packet. Beads of sweat quickly formed on both their heads; their skin turning redder with each bite. The effect was more noticeable on Rufus, but that didn't stop him from taking a decisive lead. Ron, seeing that he was falling woefully behind, fumbled the next packet. Panicked, he grabbed another and opened it forcefully sending a stream of hot sauce into his left eye.

"Yeeeoooaw! IT BURNS!" Ron shouted as he bolted out of the booth. His hand immediately covered up the injury as he continued to run around the store in a pattern that could only be descried as a 'sick chicken' yelling and complaining every step of the way. Through the tears in his right eye formed from the intense heat, Ron spotted a chance at relief and made for the soda stand. Jumping the counter and nearly knocking customers and Ned out of the way, the blonde grabbed the soda water gun from the drink machine and began washing out his offended eye.

Thankfully, relief came quickly, though his left eye was considerably more bloodshot than his right. Ron took a few deep breathes to calm himself down before catching the very annoyed stare of the store's assistant manager.

"Sorry, Ned," Ron said delicately while jumping back over the counter. "Diablo sauce in my eye," he added pointing at it for unneeded emphasis before making his way back to his booth.

Monique looked on with mild repulsion as Kim, without saying a word, tried to suppress her smile at her boyfriend's 8.5 on the Weird-o-Meter display and began to help dry him off. As the redhead came right out and called Ron a "weirdo" with a big grin and a kiss to the cheek, Monique couldn't help but think the duo were made for each other. A rather unsettling idea came to mind that she couldn't help but voice.

"Does it scare anyone that the fate of the world is sometimes in Ron's hands?" she asked rhetorically. "Cause it scares me…"

Before either Kim or Ron could respond, a loud rumbling belch accompanied by flames and smoke erupted from the table below. The three teens looked down to see Rufus patting his bulging gut before giving a thumbs up after another impressive victory.

--

"Ron, come on," Kim pleaded outside the dressing room in Club Banana. "You're just going to have to trust me."

A heavy sigh emanated from behind the flimsy door followed by a "Fine."

Monique gave a teasing whistle as Ron emerged from the room in a blue button down shirt and black slacks. Kim took a more analytical approach as she walked up to her BFBF and straightened the shirt out. Standing a couple steps back, Kim motioned for him to turn around and with a roll of his eyes, he complied. Monique caught Kim lingering 'back there' a few seconds too long and with a snap of the fingers, brought the redhead back to reality.

"Okay, that'll do for Picture Day," Kim said grabbing the next clothing combination off the hanger and trying to hand them to Ron. "Let's take a look at these."

"Ah, Kim," the sidekick groaned as he resisting taking the clothes from Kim. "Is this really necessary? What's wrong with what I normally wear?"

"You 'normally' wear the same thing every day," Kim countered. "You're not a cartoon character… Plus, we're going to be seniors in a week. It's time to step up your game."

"This is worse than shopping with my mom," Ron grumbled.

"Well, I could call her and have her join us," Kim retorted brandishing the Kimunicator.

"No! No, that's okay," Ron said falling for the bluff and taking the next outfit out of her hands. But before he could tuck tail and head back into the dressing room, an almost frigid voice stopped him in his tracks.

"You know, Kim, they say that clothes make the loser," Bonnie said from behind. Kim and Monique clinched their jaws as they turned to see the personification of high school evil standing before them.

"Brrr…! Did it suddenly get cold in here?" Ron quipped coming to his own rescue with a fake shiver.

"Bonnie, to what do we owe the displeasure?" Monique almost growled. The brunette let the snide comment go as she answered.

"Just picking up something for my date with Brick tonight."

"Really," Kim scoffed. "I thought he was finally leaving for college this year."

"He is, tomorrow as a matter of fact - full football scholarship to Upperton U.," Bonnie said with a sly grin.

"Hey, good for him," Ron said sincerely. Bonnie twitched at his comment but continued.

"Quite an accomplishment _comparatively_ speaking," she added motioning to Ron. "Wouldn't you say, K.?"

"Yeah," Kim began temperature rising and taking her boyfriend's hand. "That's nothing compared to creating the number one selling item at an international restaurant chain, winning an episode of American Starmaker, and helping save the world constantly…"

"Glad to see you agree, Kim," the venomous cheerleader turned the tables on Kim. The conversation had become a major annoyance to Monique who decided to put her foot down.

"Are you planning on buying something or are you just here to harass my customers?" she asked flexing her muscle as the store's assistant manager.

"Me? Buy something from here?" Bonnie laughed. "That would be so second rate. I order all my clothes straight from the designers themselves… Ta! Ta! Losers."

With a flip of her hair, the brunette sauntered out the entrance leaving two snarling girls in her wake. If anyone was going to try to get the last word in, it would have to be Ron.

"And now it's warm again," he said loud enough for the exiting Bonnie to hear. "Kim you should have Wade check if Drakken's got another weather machine… And…"

"And what?" Kim asked more sharply than she wanted. Ron shied a bit before giving an answer.

"And…, could you ease up on my hand? You're sorta crushing it."

--

"I swear," Monique seethed stabbing her fork into her salad. "If I hear that girl make one more snide comment, I'm gonna snatch that pretty little hair off that pretty little head."

On the opposite side of the food court table, Kim and Ron had joined the raven haired beauty for lunch – Rufus scurried around the table sampling a bit of everything.

"Bonnie," Rufus said addressing Monique. The naked mole rat followed it with a raspberry and a paw's down. Pleased with the little guy's response, Monique patted his head and handed him a slice of carrot. The vegetable being a rare part of his diet, he sniffed it cautiously before taking a small bite.

"Let it go, Monique," Kim said still upset but calming down from her encounter with her cheer squad rival. "It's just Bonnie being Bonnie."

"Well, if I had access to sixteen styles of kung-fu, she wouldn't be 'just Bonnie' when I was through with her."

"Though, I have to admit I'd pay tickets to see that," Kim began as she visualized such an encounter. "The kung-fu is reserved for the bad guys trying to take over the world…"

As the conversation seemed to die down, Monique kept a stealthy eye on Kim before she picked up on something with a crafty smile.

"I bet you wish Bonnie _would_ try taking over the world just so you could kick a little Bonnie biscuit from here to Miami," Monique bated her redheaded friend. Kim gave her a soured look that confirmed everything. She thought about lying but was smart enough to realize Monique had her number.

"Yeah, maybe a little," Kim conceded with a defeated sigh. "But only if she was trying to take over the world…"

"Bonfie, frying to fake ofer fah world?" Ron asked with a mouthful of food before gulping the oversized bite down. "Now there's a disturbing concept.

"Stranger things have happened," Monique said looking at the couple sitting across from her. "But you guys wouldn't have any trouble handling her. It's not like she's a…,"

The Club Banana assistant manager stopped as three hooded figures dropped in behind her two friends. She nearly lost the fork full of greens she was holding as a look of alarm covered her face.

"Ninjas…," she finally squeaked.

"Ninjas?" Ron asked still absorbed in his meal. "Don't you mean 'ninja'? There's only one of her. Thankfully…"

Before he could take another bite or a terrified Monique could explain the danger, three more masked ninjas dropped down behind Monique trapping the teens.

"Oh, you meant actual ninjas," Ron said flatly. "I was wondering when we were going to get to the 'normal' part of the day."

Acting on pure instinct, Kim, Ron, and Rufus jumped into fighting stances. Kim had to roll her eyes as Ron added all-too gimmicky martial art's yells to his multitude of postures. Monique slowly got up from the table not allowing her fear to leave her and looked at the watch on her wrist that she wasn't wearing.

"Well, look at the time," she trembled. "Lunch break's over."

The poor girl dove behind a planter full of bushes.

"Well, at least we don't have to face _monkey_ ninjas this time," Ron commented as the standoff continued. However, a familiar and rather innocent giggle broke the tension.

"You and your American style assumptions, Stoppable-san," Yori said as she removed her hood.

"Yori?!" Kim and Ron asked in shocked unison. A further shock was visited on them as a second ninja de-hooded letting his perfect hair bounce into place as if it had just been styled.

"It is good to see you again, Kim Possible," Hirotaka said politely. Ron, though normally oblivious to such things, caught Kim's blush and shy smile. After a brief battle with the bushes, Monique reemerged and attached herself to the Japanese hunk with a starry-eyed smile.

"What'da you know? They gave me another thirty minutes!" Monique said with everything except floating hearts circling her head.

"So let me guess," Ron started almost glumly. "Monkey Fist stole something that he thinks will make him the 'monkey king' and we have to go stop him…"

"You know your arch foe well, Stoppable-san," Yori said drawing closer to the boy.

"Like the back of my hand," Ron mumbled with a roll of his eyes.

"The situation is grave," the young ninja continued as took Ron's hands. "Sensei requests that you return to Yamanouchi to train immediately. And I once again call on our bond of honor…,"

Trailing off, the beautiful but lethal young girl leaned in to give a very uncomfortable Ron a peck on his cheek. However, as her lips touched flesh, she instantly realized that she was not touching him. Her eyes opened and traced the hand covering the side of Ron's face back to an openly irked Kim.

"Excuse me, Yori," said Kim without disguising her jealousy. "But I need to have a talk with my _boyfriend."_

The words hit Yori like a well-placed kick to the gut, but years of training masked the emotional impact it had on her. Kim marched Ron away from their visitors until she was satisfied they could talk privately.

"Ron!" she yelled in a whisper. "You didn't tell her about us?"

"Speaking of not telling, anything you want to clue me in on about you and Mr. Biker Hunk Ninja over there?" Ron fired back coming to his own rescue for the second time in as many hours. It was a risky move, but succeeded in the rare occasion of disarming Kim. "Look, I'm sorry. Yori goes to a secret ninja school on a mountain top with no TV, no phone, and no e-mail. About the only way to send a shout-out would be to use a carrier pigeon and that seems pretty silly to say, 'Hey, Yori, I'm dating Kim now'!"

The side of Kim that was fiercely competitive wanted to keep going not willing to concede anything, even an argument, to anyone but Kim herself. But the growing side of her that wanted to see Ron succeed and live up to his potential won out convincing her that he had a valid and decisive point.

"You're right. I'm sorry," she said relaxing the tension she had built up. "I'm just being a little protective of you, that's all."

"Hey, I'd be protective too if I had the exclusive rights to Ron-shine," the sidekick said bringing a smile to his girlfriend's face – their little spat being instantly forgotten.

"So, I guess we'd better get going," Kim said heading back towards Yori and the others.

"Right behind you, K.P.," Ron replied.

"Actually, Monkey Fist is _your_ arch foe, so technically I'll be right behind you."

"Wait a second," said the blonde at the possibility Kim's statement brought up. "Does this mean I get to call the shots this time?"

Kim stopped as her face contorted in thought. She realized she had boxed herself in and hurriedly tried to find a way out.

"We'll see…"

* * *

A cool mountain breeze rustled the leaves of the maple trees making the warm day much more pleasant on the secret ninja school's grounds than in the valley below. Standing watch at the gates, a distinguished old man watched as three familiar figures entered. Yori and Hirotaka gave their teacher a respectful bow as Kim did likewise. The old man returned their greeting before addressing Kim.

"Kim Possible," Sensei began. "We are honored by your presence here at Yamanouchi. I only wish your first visit here could be under better circumstances."

Before Kim could return the greeting, a cloud of dirt was thrown in the air as Ron hit the ground at their feet exhausted from the ordeal of catching up. Although his friends looked no worse for wear, Ron's clothes were tattered and dirty and his hair more tussled than usual.

"'Sup, Sensei?" he wheezed from his back. "You know…, if I ever get… another naco royalty check… it will be my honor to buy you guys… an escalator…"

--

Yamanouchi's armament room was full of swords, katanas, nunchucks, staves, and all other various tools of the ninja trade. Removing an object from an ornate glass case, the school's master approached Ron and Rufus who were joined by Kim, Yori, and Hirotaka - all of whom had changed into the traditional garb of the school.

"Cool!" Ron exclaimed as Sensei presented him the Lotus Blade. "Forgot about the magic sword! Wonder if this thing still works…"

"It just looks like an ordinary sword to me," Kim said trying not to be overly skeptical.

With a small bit of concentration, Ron stuck out his tongue and proved Kim's doubts wrong. A brilliant flash of blue light transformed the sword into a battle staff. The redhead, although knowing about the Lotus Blade, had no clue as to its true powers - a fact signified by her gaping jaw and wide eyes. Ron put the enchanted weapon through its paces transforming it into a shield, a set of nunchucks, a what-cha-ma-jigger, and a 9 iron. Getting a slightly sly look on his face, another burst of light changed the enchanted weapon into a Lotus bouquet. Ron presented it to a blushing Kim. She hesitantly took hold of it for a moment before giving it back to Ron who turned the blade back into its resting form. An impartial observer would have failed to notice, but the heightened senses of both Sensei and Hirotaka were able to catch Yori's near inaudible sigh at the display. His students' teen relationship issues aside, Sensei had more important matters to address.

"Stoppable-san, the scroll Monkey Fist stole holds the very key to the Mystical Monkey Power. It is said that only the Chosen One, using the power of the Lotus Blade, can unlock the seal and restore balance to the Power."

"Whoa," Ron began as Sensei's words impacted him. "You think I'm the 'Chosen One'?"

"That remains to be seen," the master replied choosing his words carefully. "However, the honor of recovering the scroll and defeating Monkey Fist, once again, falls to you. It would be best to begin training immediately…"

"Um, that's great, Sensei," the blonde replied not entirely Kosher with the idea. "But remember what happened last time you guys tried to train me? I practically destroyed the place."

"Do not be disheartened," Sensei said giving Ron a reassuring pat on the arm. "We were planning on renovating anyway…"

--

The mountain stream playfully tumbled over rocks and twigs as fish swam about in its rather strong current doing whatever it is that fish do all day. The gentle breeze continued to rustle the branches of the trees as birds chirped and flew about.

On a stone that barely had enough room for his feet in the middle of the stream, Ron tried to maintain his balance while holding a bucket of water in each hand at arms' length. Despite the growing strain in his muscles, the sidekick endured though desperately hoping for the exercise to end. To make matters worse, a small lady bug landed on his nose producing a small 'eep!' in the back of Ron's throat. The blonde began twitching his nose hoping to shake the bug. But like a rodeo champion, the tiny creature held tough. Switching tactics, Ron stuck out his bottom lip and attempted to blow the bug off as his eyes began to show more panic over the encounter. A second attempt was no more successful than the first. Drawing in a deep breath, Ron blew as hard as he could finally forcing the lady bug to take flight but at the same time triggering his sneeze mechanism. He resisted as long as he could before a grande-sized 'Achoo!' toppled his wobbly balance and dumped him into the water.

Sensei watched as his pupil hauled himself onto the shore line with a shiver. Holding his hand out, the old man allowed the lady bug to land softly in his palm. As the bug explored its new landing pad, Sensei reflected at the lesson at hand and addressed his student.

"Stoppable-san, what have we learned?"

"That the water gets really cold after it leaves the hot springs," Ron replied with chattering teeth.

Calling on the patience of a lifetime of teaching, Sensei allowed himself a small smile beneath his flowing white beard before continuing.

"Look closer," he said displaying Ron the bug that had beat him. "And you will find that size and strength are nothing if victory and defeat have already been achieved in the mind."

As Ron leaned in closer to look at the lady bug, the creature stretched its wings a couple times before flying off into the afternoon.

--

Stoppable-san gulped nervously as he leaned over the edge of the pit. He wasn't sure why Yamanouchi had a pit full of bubbling lava or whose idea it was to stretch a long wooden beam across it. But he was certain that the chains swinging large sandbags, axes, and spikey metal balls across the precarious path were flat out overkill.

"That would be so cool if you weren't going to try to make me cross it," Ron said turning back to Kim, Yori, and Hirotaka.

Yori was busy fixing a blindfold around her ninja school mate. The young man calmly walked to the front of the treacherous course and, sensing the pattern of the first obstacle, made his way onto the beam. Stopping and starting at just the right moments, Hirotaka made his way across to the other side as if he had done it many times before.

"Okay," began Ron fully certain that he stood no chance. "This is definitely some sort of advanced placement ninja course. Wouldn't' you say Kim…? Kim?"

Kim sprinted past him with her blindfold securely on. She tumbled, flipped, dashed, and split her way across the beam in half the time as Hirotaka leaving Ron speechless and their two counterparts impressed.

"It's got the same rhythm as that routine we took to regionals last year," Kim said removing the blindfold.

With Kim now on the other side, Ron sickened to the notion that he would have to go next. Yori wasted no time confirming that fact.

"Now it will be your honor to go across," she said brandishing another blindfold.

"Shouldn't my parents have the honor of signing a permission slip first?" Ron inquired fruitlessly. The young ninja giggled at his request as she secured the blindfold and positioned him at the start of the course.

His heart rate skyrocketed as he could feel the heat from the lava ripple across his face. The constant rumble of the swinging pendulums of various dooms vibrated his core. In spite of an intense desire to run screaming in the opposite direction, Ron mustered every ounce of his courage. _Okay, everyone's counting on me. Gotta make through training so you're just going to have to calm down and get this right,_ he told himself. Clearing his mind, he slowly began to sense the rush of air indicating when the first sand bag had passed. Allowing himself to get in sync, Ron finally walked out onto the beam.

Feeling the first obstacle rush _behind_ him, the sidekick got a small dose of confidence and concentrated on the next one. He cleared the second one the same as the first; then the third; then the fourth; getting past each with more speed. But the fifth…

Ron took one step too far allowing one of the sandbags to brush his front side. Startled, he stepped backwards to get out of danger only to feel the one behind him brush his backside. His concentration broken, the Stoppable _Flight or Flight_ mechanism overwhelmed his higher brain functions. Abandoning any pretext of using his senses to clear the next obstacle, Ron made a poorly balanced mad dash forward and didn't stop until he hit something – hard.

Falling backwards, Ron was almost certain of his doom and failure. However, as he hit the ground and noticed that it was all around him, he suddenly realized he had made it! Whipping off his blindfold, he found that the thing he had run into was a stunned Hirotaka.

"Incredible," the young ninja with a perfect hair cut said. "It's as if you completed the course by sheer luck."

Bolstered not only by not being incinerated but his success as well, Ron got to his feet.

"Boo-yah!" he declared. "The Ron-san comes through again! What next?"

His enthusiasm faded as neither Kim nor Hirotaka looked him in the eyes or answered him. Kim cleared her throat in the 'please notice the thing that's making us uncomfortable' way. Ron didn't have to be told as his legs reported back to him a lot more contact with the air than they had a moment before. Turning back to the obstacle course, Ron saw the pants portion of his gi swinging from one of the battle axes.

"Now it will be your honor to get them back!" Yori yelled with another giggle from the other side.

Ron grumbled loudly as he started to walk back towards the beam before a hand on his shoulder stopped him. With a smirk, Hirotaka handed the blindfold back to an even more sour-faced Ron.

--

The courtyard was quickly filling up with aspiring martial arts students under the mid-day sun. Each fell into an orderly line and waited their turn to snatch a morsel of food from the elderly lady holding the tray.

"Okay, Kim," Ron said putting on his serious face. "This woman makes Cafeteria Lady look like a saint."

Near the end of the line but in front of Ron, Kim peaked ahead to try and see what Ron was talking about as he continued his speech.

"Gotta stay sharp; don't lose focus; take no prisoners; don't swipe until you see the whites of her eyes!!"

Having moved far enough ahead in line, Kim got a good look at Cafeteria Lady's Yamanouchi counterpart and the process with which lunch was served. She rolled her eyes as she turned back to Ron.

"Ron, I think you're being a bit overdramatic," Kim whispered as they reached the front of the line.

"Look at her! She's pure evil!" Ron whispered back.

The redhead shot him a 'just watch' glance before stepping forward. In a flash, Kim successfully swiped her lunch from the tray leaving Ron to stew over his girlfriend's victory.

With Kim enjoying her sushi, Ron stepped forward with a massive chip on his shoulder. Gathering himself, he made his first attempt – and came up empty. With a 'grr!', he tried again. And a third time. And a fourth. All coming up woefully short. The old woman didn't even bother looking at him as she kept his chopsticks empty of lunch. Having been soundly defeated, Ron switched tactics and started walking past her with a carefree whistle. Just before the next student could step forward and try his own luck, Ron spun on a dime and lunged for the tray. As with his previous attempts, he had nothing to show for his efforts. The woman easily moved the tray out of the way allowing Ron to land flat on his stomach.

The commotion was enough to disturb Rufus from his pre-lunch nap. Popping out of Ron's pocket, the naked mole rat quickly surmised the situation and spring-boarded up onto the tray. Before he could devour the remaining pieces of food, the old woman motioned for him to stop. After halting in confusion at the lunchtime denial, he was pointed to a specially prepared tray sitting on a bench behind her. With a squeal of delight, Rufus leaped from one tray to the other and gorged himself on the tray of sushi. Ron watched on his elbows and sulked at such an injustice.

--

The setting sun bathed the mountain school in an almost magical yellow-orange light. Sensei made his way down the steps to the lower level of the complex – a troubled Ron right behind him. Sensing his student's anxiety, he stopped near the bottom.

"Is something troubling you, Stoppable-san?" the old master asked. Ron halted a couple steps above him and sighed.

"Sensei," the blonde replied with a frown. "I appreciate you guys training me again and everything, but I think this is going worse than last time…"

The short, bearded man nodded as he thought about how best to pick-up Ron's spirits.

"May I ask how many buildings you destroyed today?" came his unusual question. It had been a long, tough, and altogether trying day, but as Ron thought about it, the answer was…

"None," he replied with a small grin.

"And that is what you fail to see. The path to every successful journey must always begin with a first step," Sensei observed before walking down the last couple stairs and into the school's dojo. Ron, tension relieved, followed him inside.

Inside the training facility, students worked on punching bags, breaking blocks of concrete, and sparred with weapons. Leading Ron to the center mat, Sensei joined a waiting Kim.

"I think it would be best if we ended the day with a friendly sparring match," the school's master said to Ron. Having just gained a confidence boost, he seemed to accept the idea.

"Why not?" he asked as he stepped away from Kim and Sensei to begin his theatrical style of warming up for battle. "Who you got for me?"

When Sensei didn't answer, Ron turned to find the old man was no longer behind him. Darting his eyes around the room, he finally spotted him taking his seat in the judge's box. The light slowly came on in Ron's head as he made the agonizing turn back to face Kim. His best friend looked at him like a lioness staring down its prey as she finished tying her hair back into a ponytail.

"Oh snap…," Ron groaned as the redhead began limbering up. When she was finished, she gave him the traditional bow and then launched a flying kick right for his head…

--

"Aaoooh!" Ron winced as Kim pressed the icepack to his bruised shoulder. The couple was sitting and leaning against the wall of Ron's entirely too small room. A single candle fended off the darkness of night.

"Sorry," Kim apologized shifting the pack for his comfort as he continued to scowl. "I thought you were going to roll with that punch…"

"I didn't roll with the first two, Kim. Why'd you think I'd roll with the third?" Ron retorted in a rare foul mood. Kim gave the boy some leeway knowing it had been a very difficult day on him. Still, she was going try to her best to put things in a positive light.

"You know, Ron," she said trying to encourage him. "You were really holding your own against me."

"Uh-huh," came the sharp counter. "Right up until I kicked the support column out and you had to save everyone before the roof collapsed."

"Well, if you want to bring that up…"

After a moment of silence, a heavy sigh from Ron shifted his frustration back into melancholy.

"I'm starting to think that maybe I'm not suppose to be the Chosen One," he said looking at the ground.

"Well, Sensei did say it remained to be seen," Kim said honestly before taking his hand. "But there's one thing I can see…"

"Yeah? What's that?"

"A guy who's trying his best and isn't going to quit because he can always count on his best friend being there for him," Kim replied softly. To ensure that her words lifted his spirits, she added a delicate kiss to the tip of his nose. It went a long way in pulling the blonde out of his funk.

"Thanks, K.P.," he said with his eyes thanking her more than his words.

"That's what I'm here for," the teen heroin said as the emotional tug of the moment pulled her lips towards Ron's. They were quickly separated by the sound of a rocket ship blasting off.

"Huh-uh! Black hole!" Rufus declared finishing his impression of a doomed space probe. The two teens stabbed the pink rodent with their eyes at his betrayal. He could care less about their indignation as he thought about the wonderful exotic cheeses his 'employer' had promised him for his chaperoning services. Deciding she ought to get to bed anyway, Kim gave her boyfriend another peck on the cheek.

"Goodnight, Stoppable-san," she added as she got up to leave.

"G'night, Kim," Ron trailed after her as she shut the door. The boy took in a deep breath and slowly let it out before turning to his pet.

"Traitor," he said with mock outrage. Blowing out the candle, Ron settled in for bed and as soon as he closed his eyes, he was fast asleep.

--

A dark menacing figure stood on a treacherous outcropping of rocks sticking out from the mountain. Staring out over the valley, Monkey Fist took in the soft glowing lights of Yamanouchi across from him as one by one, they went out for the night. It had been a year and a half since he had stood on this very spot certain of his coming reign as Supreme Monkey Ruler. A year and a half since one mistake allowed his, though he loathed to calling him it, arch foe to get the upper hand and defeat his plans. But this time was going to be different. He had planned every detail – was ready for any contingency – the sidekick's fate was sealed…

Reveling in his almost certain victory, the genetically-altered English lord was joined on his perch by a small hooded monkey.

"Report," Fist demanded coldly. The simian servant chattered away as his master nodded.

"Excellent. Let the fools think that a couple days of training will compare to a lifetime of devotion. Is there anything else?"

A few more sentences from the monkey ninja caused Monkey Fist to raise an eyebrow.

"So, it appears that hero and sidekick have become an 'item'," the monkey-man said with an evil grin. "That could prove most useful… Tell the others we attack tomorrow."

The pint-sized warrior scampered away leaving Fist alone. The villain leaned forward as he once again stared at the secret ninja school.

"Sleep well, Stoppable, for tomorrow you face your doom…"

* * *

To be continued…


	8. Return to Yamanouchi, Part II

Thanks to CajunBear73, Pharaoh Rutin Tutin, daywalkr82, spectre666, Isamu, leadfoot352, Brother Buldgeon, Stand Alone Battle A.I, Molloy, Randy C, Akinyi, and RonHeartbreaker for reading and reviewing. Leave your review and collect your special thank you today!

Well, folks, this is it. After leaving Ron and Monkey Fist stranded on the brink of conflict in Part I for almost a year, it is time for them to finally get on with it!

A very special thanks to all of those who were here for these episodes the first time around and have offered further encouragement this time through. I tried to come up with a way of saying thanks to all of you but I realized the best way was to stick to it and give you guys and gals all new chapters for you to dive into. Here is the first of what I hope will be many more to come…

As always, enjoy!

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within are owned by the Walt Disney Corporation._

* * *

_Episode 7: Return to Yamanouchi, Part II_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

**Previously on Kim Possible:**

"And now, it gives me great pleasure to present to you _Ancient Secrets of Tai Shing Pek Kwar_!"

"Finally, with the prophesies of Toshimiru in hand, my destiny as the Supreme Monkey Ruler will be revealed to the world!"

"There is only one person who can stop Monkey Fist now."

"Ah, Kim Possible!"

"No, but she is our contact."

"Contact…? To who?"

"Yeeeoooaw! IT BURNS!"

"Does it scare anyone that the fate of the world is sometimes in Ron's hands?"

"You know, Kim, they say that clothes make the loser."

"Oh, you meant actual ninjas. I was wondering when we were going to get to the 'normal' part of the day."

"Sensei requests that you return to Yamanouchi to train immediately. And I once again call on our bond of honor…,"

"Stoppable-san, the scroll Monkey Fist stole holds the very key to the Mystical Monkey Power. It is said that only the Chosen One, using the power of the Lotus Blade, can unlock the seal and restore balance to the Power."

"That would be so cool if you weren't going to try to make me cross it."

"Now it will be your honor to get them back!"

"Okay, Kim, this woman makes Cafeteria Lady look like a saint."

"I appreciate you guys training me again and everything, but I think this is going worse than last time…"

"The path to every successful journey must always begin with a first step."

"But there's one thing I can see…"

"Yeah? What's that?"

"A guy who's trying his best and isn't going to quit because he can always count on his best friend being there for him."

"Huh-uh! Black hole!"

"Traitor."

"So, it appears that hero and sidekick have become an 'item'. That could prove most useful… Tell the others we attack tomorrow."

"Sleep well, Stoppable, for tomorrow you face your doom…"

**And now the conclusion of Return to Yamanouchi…**

* * *

_The air rushed out of Ron's lungs as he hit the ground on his stomach – hard. With a groan and the last of his grit and determination, he rolled over and tried to pick himself up. He had only gotten to his hands and knees when he spotted him. Standing on some sort of 'monkey seal' on the temple's floor, Monkey Fist gave the blonde a sinister sneer as he collected the scroll and the Lotus Blade. The genetically altered villain touched the Blade to the wax on the scroll and a burst of light shot out. A column of energy quickly enveloped Fist as he was lifted off of his feet. As the former English lord's cackle grew louder and louder, a pulse blasted out from the light knocking Ron back before the room returned to normal._

_As his eyes readjusted, Ron was instantly sickened by what he saw. Monkey Fist was still on the seal with scroll and Lotus Blade in hand. However, he was wearing a crown of golden interlocking monkeys and was covered in a shaggy layer of fur._

"_Yes!" Fist began with a fevered shout. "Now all shall bow before me, the Supreme Monkey Ruler!"_

_Ron backpedaled in horror only to run into something behind him. He spun to find it was just as terrifying as his arch foe's new form._

"_Stoppable-san," said a large monkey with a pink headband in a hurt defeated tone. "You have failed us…"_

_The sidekick hyperventilated as he tried to escape but this time ran into another monkey standing upright. However this one looked much older and had a long flowing beard._

"_It appears that I too misjudged you. You were not up to the task at hand," monkey Sensei said with pained eyes as monkey Yori joined him. For a third time, Ron tried to back out of the situation terrified out of his mind._

"_K.P., help! We got some serious monkey mojo going on!" he screamed as he ran without looking where he was going. The boy ran into yet another obstacle this time being knocked flat on his rear._

"_You're telling me," said another human sized monkey – this one with flowing red hair. On her shoulder stood a not so naked mole rat. Each looked at him with betrayal in their eyes._

"_No…," Ron started weakly at the site of his best friends' new forms. "Kim, you're a monkey."_

"_Look in the mirror lately, Ron?" monkey Kim sassed as she flipped open her compact. Deliberately, she swiveled its mirror as Ron was too terrified to look away. But he already knew what he was about to see. Time came to a crawl as his image slowly reflected back at him…_

--

"Aaaaah!" Ron screamed as he bolted out of his less than peaceful slumber. A thin layer of cold sweat covered his skin as he continued to breathe deeply. His hand reached out for his phone, but he only remembered where he was until he grasped thin air.

Realizing that Kim was just down the hall gave him almost as much comfort as calling her. He laid back down on his mat as his breathing returned to normal, but after a moment of tossing and turning, the blonde knew sleep was not going to return to him any time soon. Careful not to wake up Rufus, who looked like he was pleasantly dreaming about a journey down a river of cheese, Ron slipped out of his room.

--

A thin ribbon of red leaked out of the Eastern horizon and danced along the mountain ridges. The air was very still as the Moon and the stars prepared to take their leave of the sky.

Ron walked with his hands in his pockets hunched over not going anywhere in particular. Despite the fact that it was summer, his breath still appeared in the cool mountain air. He was just about to the edge of the school's grounds when he noticed a figure staring off towards where the sun was due to rise – the pink headband revealing her identity.

"Um, hey, Yori," Ron said delicately as he came to stop next to her. "Can't sleep either?"

"No," the ninja girl said without looking at him. "I was doing some… reflection."

Ron read the young woman's expression as he listened to her somewhat deflated tone. This was not the optimistic and cheerful girl he had come to know.

"Is everything all right?" he pressed. With a gathering sigh, Yori turned to the blonde and tried to put on a good show.

"Of course, I was just preparing my thoughts for our upcoming confrontation with Monkey Fist."

Ron allowed for silence to follow her words. _Great, now I figure out how to understand girls,_ he silently observed knowing that Monkey Fist was the furthest thing from Yori's mind. The last time a girl tried to cover her emotions in front of him, he blew his chance to say something giving room for Drakken's syntho-hottie to sweep Kim away. And although that had all worked out in the end, Ron couldn't keep quiet this time.

"Yori," he started hesitantly. "I'm sorry about how you found out about me and, um…, uh…,"

"Kim?"

"Yeah, her. I hope you're not mad at me or anything…" Ron trailed off rubbing the back of his neck

"Why would I be mad at you?" Yori replied.

"Well, I mean, you 'like' liked me, remember? And then the next time you see me, I'm with Kim. You gotta admit that's kind of rough," the blonde explained gently.

"It is okay, Stoppable-san," the young ninja said with a melancholy smile. "You must understand that I am happy for you and Kim. It is meant to be…"

His friend's statement perplexed him as much as it relieved him to hear. But he knew he still didn't have the whole story.

"But what about you?" he asked.

Yori's eyes went to the ground searching for her answer. With a deep breath she looked back up to Ron.

_Dong. Dong._ The school's bell tolled as the top edge of the sun edged over the horizon. _Dong. Dong._

"It is time for morning meditation," Yori stated taking the opportunity to avoid Ron's question. Giving him a polite bow, the black haired girl left him alone on the ledge with the sunrise. He couldn't help but be reminded of the failed romantic scene from _Bricks of Fury IV: Bricks in Love._

"Nice going, Stoppable-san," he muttered to himself.

--

"Ron?" Kim asked sliding open the room's newspaper covered door. The redhead was hurriedly trying to catch up after sleeping past Yamanouchi's sunrise wake-up call. Poking her head into Ron's room, all she found was Rufus curled up still snoring away. Crossing the room, she bent down and gave the little guy a poke. Shaking himself out of his slumber, Rufus yawned and stretched.

"Rufus," Kim inquired. "Where's Ron?"

Finally getting his bearing, the naked mole rat scanned the room confused that his human was not there also.

"Huh. D'noh!" the rodent said.

"Sensei has taken Stoppable-san off school grounds for a private lesson," a voice said from behind startling Kim. The teen heroine spun to find Hirotaka standing in the doorway.

"Hirotaka," Kim said calming down. "You surprised me."

"My apologies, Kim Possible," he smoothly replied. "Would you like to join us in the courtyard for morning classes?"

"Um, sure," she answered before scooping up Rufus and leaving with her former crush.

--

A dozen or so of Yamanouchi's finest were engaged in combat training – either hand to hand or with their weapon of choice – in the school's courtyard. As Kim, with Rufus on her shoulder, and Hirotaka walked out into the sunlight, the redhead took note of Yori working fiercely on a punching bag on the opposite side from them. The trio stopped on the edge of the yard and took it all in. Kim observed the other students noticing their proficiency in fighting before Hirotaka spoke up.

"How did Stoppable-san win your affections?" Hirotaka asked out of the blue watching Yori continue to pummel the punching bag.

The question jarred Kim out of her observations of the other students and forced her to evaluate the hunky student ninja. Her answer brought a flood of warm memories of the moment Ron finally revealed what he had been feeling.

"Well, he was there when I needed him the most," she said as a warm smile filled her face. "He's always been there… Why do you ask?"

When Hirotaka didn't give an answer, and rather continued his stare, Kim traced back the source of his attention. As the dots were connected, a devious grin replaced her warm smile.

"You're crushing on Yori, aren't you?" the redhead asked getting an ever so slight reaction from the perfect haired young man – which was an enormous tip-off given his skill as a ninja. "So why haven't you made a move?"

Rather than reply, Hirotaka gave a sigh. Kim continued almost in disbelief.

"You're trying to tell me the guy who had every girl at Middleton High fighting over him like wolves is too shy to ask a girl like Yori out?"

"Yes."

"But why?"

"I have found it difficult to approach her on the matter," Hirotaka started off. "Her attentions have been…, elsewhere."

"Stoppable-san," Kim astutely added. "But the good news for you is he's 'off the market' now. There's nothing to stop you. Besides, it might help her to know that someone else out there 'likes' likes her…"

"It's not that simple," the ninja responded. Almost as if she had sensed that they were talking about her, Yori caught Hirotaka's stare forcing him to look quickly away. With another grunt, the girl returned to her training.

"Don't worry," Kim tried to encourage. "She'll come around soon."

Hirotaka gave the redhead a thankful smile and allowed his thoughts to turn elsewhere. It was then that the young man tilted his head as he began to look concerned.

"Do you hear that?" he asked.

Kim took a look around for herself and concentrated on her hearing but heard nothing.

"I don't hear anything," Kim asked not sure why that was a bad thing.

"That is the problem," Hirotaka said tensing up.

Slowly, each of the dozen or so students stopped their practice also noting the change in the air. For a perfect summer morning, there should have been a rustle in the wind and birds happily chirping. Instead, there was none of that - just an eerie silence. Sensing the danger, the students, Kim, Yori, and Hirotaka gathered themselves closer just in time for a wave of screeching, black hooded fur to come crashing over the school's walls…

--

A small clearing in the woods in the valley below Yamanouchi featured an elegant Buddhist-style shrine. Sensei sat patiently on a sawed off stump monitoring his student's progress.

The blonde haired student sat lotus style in front of the old master - eyes closed. Ron did his best to clear his mind letting the rhythm of the nearby stream tune the beats of his heart. As all the distractions – his looming battle with Monkey Fist, Yori's disappointment, and starting his senior year of high school - fade from his consciousness. As he focused only on the thoughts Sensei directed him to, he began to feel as though a cool but comforting force was surrounding him. And he felt light – very light – as if he were…

Ron opened his eyes to see Sensei staring right back at him. That, of course, was what he expected to see. The treetops that surrounded them and the large amount of space between him and the ground were not.

"Aaah!" Ron cried as his busted concentration caused him to plummet towards the Earth. Right before impact, Sensei's hand grabbed onto to his and lowered him to the ground safely. The old man floated to a landing while Ron wheezed in and out over the ordeal with his hands on his knees.

"I bet you're going to ask me why I failed," said a disappointed Ron between breathes. Sensei brushed his beard before responding.

"No, I was going to ask you why you succeeded," Yamanouchi's wise teacher said. His words straightened up Stoppable-san as he began to look skyward to where he had been floating.

"Hey," Ron said as he slowly began to understand that he had seen a measure of success. "I did kinda get up there a ways…"

"Though the journey may be long," Sensei began with a reassuring pat. "Even a small step brings you closer to its conclusion."

Ron reflected on the sage advice, but something about it seemed familiar.

"Wait a second," he said as he pieced it together. "That's the same thing you told me yesterday… Only different and stuff."

Sensei stroked his beard again at the boy's observation.

"Just because an idea is…," he began before a faint clanging interrupted him. Both he and Ron turned to look up the mountain at the secret ninja school.

"Is it lunch time already?" Ron asked confused.

"No," Sensei said in a tone that allowed Ron to realize the gravity of the situation. There was only one other thing that the ringing could mean…

* * *

Swarms of monkey ninjas attacked in waves as the students of Yamanouchi bravely defended their school. The less advanced students had been well trained and knew to stick together. Still, the sheer number of opponents was close to overwhelming. The more advanced fighters, Kim, Yori, and Hirotaka, had each been isolated from each other with their own swarms of foes. Even Rufus had his paws full of fur and fists.

As Kim fended off attack after attack, she knew that what Monkey Fist's minions had lacked before in skill, they were making up for in numbers. She caught glimpses of the others who were all valiantly holding their ground, but even the girl who could do anything knew that their sitch was dire. They needed help and they needed it fast.

"Boo-hi-yah!" shouted a blonde flash jumping into the middle of the battle. Everyone took notice as Ron landed taking out several monkey ninjas as he did so. The sidekick turned lead man wasted no time tearing into their hooded foes with his signature screams of courage dispatching each attacker with a kick or chop or punch.

Quickly, monkey ninjas who had been pressing Kim and the others broke away to join the growing maelstrom around Ron. The blonde soon found himself facing the same problem as his compatriots had: too much fur.

"Stoppable-san!" Yori yelled as she seized the opportunity to grab a battle staff that had been lost in the fight and hurled it in Ron's direction. Vaulting off the back of a monkey, the boy caught it and immediately brought its force to bear against an attacker.

Kim had her hands full long after the ninjas eased up on the other students and she hadn't yet gotten an opportunity to see what it was that had come to their aid. But as she dispatched the last few that came after her, the redhead could finally look at what her foes were now focused on. Her jaw nearly dislocated as she watched her boyfriend dispose of the monkey minions blow by blow and kick by kick like he was the hero from _Bricks of Fury VI: Last Brick Standing_. It was one thing to believe her best friend had potential – even as a fighter. It was quite another to see that potential's full depth on display. Kim's shock was so complete that she didn't even notice the gorilla's paw wrapping around her and hoisting her in the air.

"Impressive, isn't it?" Monkey Fist said noting her reaction to her BF's tirade. She found Fist standing on the shoulders of a second armored ape next to the one that had captured her.

"What is?" Kim said as she began to struggle in the gorilla's clutches.

"The Mystical Monkey Power that has managed to turn your boyfriend from a bumbler into a master of Tai Shing Pek Kwar," the genetically altered former English lord said as he watched Ron begin to finish off the last of his lackeys. "Unfortunately for him, and you I'm afraid, I too have the power. And the upper hand…," he added with a sneer before producing the scroll.

"You know you can't win, Fist, so why don't you just hand over the scroll now and we can all go home," Kim grunted against the pressure of the ape's paw. Monkey Fist rolled his eyes with a snort at the comment.

"Is that the best line you've got? I'm afraid you've become a tired cliché, cheerleader," the monkey man retorted.

"Right back at you," Kim growled. With a narrowing of his eyes, Fist decided he'd had enough banter and it was time to start the main event. Leaping from his perch, Monkey Fist landed a safe distance from Ron just as the sidekick finished the last of the monkey ninjas.

"Bravo, Stoppable. Bravo," Fist said with a sarcastic clap as Yori, Hirotaka, Sensei and the other students gathered behind Ron.

"Monkey Fist!" Ron declared seriously at the sight of his arch foe before shifting to a sly smile. "How's your _girlfriend_ doing?"

"Considerably better than yours," the furry villain replied with a sly grin of his own. Stepping to the side, he revealed Kim's plight to Ron.

"K.P.!" the blonde shouted at the site of his best friend in the clutches of the menacing ape. "Oh, you're going down fur ball! You and the gorillas!"

"If only that were true," Monkey Fist said menacingly.

"Yeah, well, we'll just have to…," Ron said taking a couple steps forward ready to charge before he realized something – something big – and stopped.

"Hey, wait a second," he said as a perplexed look crossed his face. "Aren't those DNAmy's gorillas?"

"Yeah," Kim added still captured but her suspicions rising as well. "And you didn't exactly correct Ron when he asked how your 'girlfriend' was."

When all Monkey Fist did in response was clinch his fists and shudder, the looks of confusion on Kim's and Ron's faces turned into disgust.

"Gorchie!" Ron shouted.

"Wrongsick!" Kim immediately followed.

The disgraced nobleman was left to simmer as the two teen heroes convulsed at the notion of him and DNAmy together.

"Dude," Ron said in a pleading tone. "When I said I thought you two were on a date, I wasn't suggesting that you _keep _dating her! Ewhuck! Who next? Motor Ed and Shego?"

"You can't actually be with her 'cause you like her," the redhead added.

"True, I do find her to be quite intolerable," Fist said with a grumble. "But the relationship does have its advantages…"

With a snap of Fist's fingers, the second armored ape smashed through the wall of one of the ancient buildings on the campus and tossed a huge chunk of it towards Ron and the others. Everyone scattered to avoid the projectile except one small pink figure that charged forward and slipped unnoticed into Kim's gi. The girl had to suppress a ticklish giggle as the pink rodent wrapped around her ankle out of sight.

As the debris cloud settled, Ron rolled over and got up to check on the others. Seeing everyone was okay, he turned back to Monkey Fist who had taken advantage of the distraction. Riding one of his two gorilla warriors, they now stood on the outer wall of the school.

"The Temple of the Great Monkey Seal," the mutant super villain declared pointing at Ron. "Be there after sundown, bring the Lotus Blade, and come alone…," he added before turning with an evil grin to Kim who sneered right back at him. "Otherwise _your_ little girlfriend will face the consequences."

As soon as he finished his ultimatum, he and the gorillas slipped over the walls followed by the few remaining monkey ninjas that were conscious. The warriors of Yamanouchi were left to begin surveying the damage and tend to their injuries. A solemn Ron stared after his arch foe and his girlfriend long after they disappeared before being joined by Sensei, Yori, and Hirotaka.

"Sensei, it's time for some smack-monkey…" Ron growled. "…And lunch…"

--

Kim wondered why she bothered struggling against her captors. She wasn't going anywhere. The redhead found it funny that she had a code of traditions as a hero that she followed just as much as the bad guys. One of them dictated that she must always fight against her captors even if she had no chance of escape. Keeping up the charade against the gorillas, they remained firm with their grip on her. One of the monkey ninjas bound her hands above her head and secured the rope to the wall leaving her feet to make enough contact with the ground to keep her arms from being pulled tight.

The chamber the teen heroine found herself in was expansive. Torches ringed the domed roof around a large seal on the floor. Kim recognized the old symbol, a lanky monkey in a kung fu pose, from the mission when they had first encountered Lord Montgomery Fiske. As if on cue, the man now known as Monkey Fist entered the chamber scroll in hand. _Ron was actually wrong about him,_ Kim thought painfully. _Fist isn't five hundred miles of bad road. He's more like five thousand…_

"Leave us," Fist ordered the gorillas and the few monkey ninjas loyal and disciplined enough to continue following their master after a rough day of action. Making sure they were alone, the genetically altered villain smugly turned to Kim.

"It really is too bad," Fist began.

"That Ron's going to kick your freaky tail when he gets here?" Kim sassed. Fist scowled as he brought his furry paw under Kim's chin.

"No," he growled before stepping back. "I was saying that it's too bad I'm going to have to destroy young Stoppable. I've actually come to respect him. I must admit he's finally showing potential as a worthy adversary…"

"By 'potential', you mean defeating you every time you've ever fought him?" the redhead acidicly quipped. The monkey man grumbled at this further barb.

"I will be the first to acknowledge underestimating him in the past. But when this scroll is unsealed, the injustices that have held me back will be swept away and all will tremble before me!" he began to rant lifting the scroll above his head.

"Where's my little monkey muffin?" a sing-songy voice echoed from one of the chamber's entrances. Although high-pitched and homely, it had the effect of deflating Fist's villainous ego as his shoulders slumped and a look of pure contempt filled his face.

"Monkey muffin? You mean she's actually here?!" Kim laughed as the irrepressible genetic scientist entered the room. The cheerleader took a small bit of comfort in the fact that the woman was no longer a tiny head on a hulking gorilla body. Thankfully, DNAmy had returned herself to her normal human form.

"Hey! You didn't tell me we had a visitor!" the Cuddle Buddy enthusiast pouted putting her hands on her hips. If Monkey Fist grinded his teeth any harder, they would have shattered. He didn't even bother to turn around and look at his 'girlfriend' as he responded.

"Amy, can't you see I'm a tad busy at the moment. I have business to finish up with Possible," he seethed through his teeth.

"You can finish up with your little friend later," DNAmy demanded as she grabbed the dark master of Monkey Kung Fu by the arm. "You promised to watch Agony County with me!"

Despite her 'captee' status, Kim reveled in every second of Fist trying to repress his gag reflex.

"Ah, Monty's got some cuddle time with his _girlfriend_," Kim mocked with fake romantic wit. Monkey Fist shot her an icy gaze.

"You're going to pay for that one…"

Oblivious to the current mood and situation she had thrown herself into, DNAmy began to tug her one time patient out of the room.

"Come on! We don't want to miss the start of the show. I made hot chocolate and ginger snaps and you can paint my nails during the commercials!" Amy said practically dragging her 'boyfriend' as if he were an unwilling canine to the vet's office. As soon as the couple was out of the room, Kim could no longer contain herself and erupted with laughter.

"Oh-ho-ho, wow!" she chuckled skyward after finally getting it back together. _Monkey boy deserves every bit of that torture_, thought Kim as she checked to make sure they were alone. "Okay, Rufus. All clear."

The naked mole rat unwrapped himself from Kim's ankle and spilled out onto the floor looking as though he were ready to lose his lunch.

"DNAmy?" the pink rodent said with a fake finger gag.

"You're telling me…," Kim trailed off thinking about the ickier aspects of the villains' relationship. As per standard operating procedures, Rufus scampered up Kim's side and set about freeing her bonds.

"I am _so_ buying you your own nacho cheese dispenser when we get home," Kim promised Ron's pet for his cunning heroics. _Just have to escape, meet up with Ron and the others and…_, Kim started to think before a different plan came to mind.

"Wait, stop," she requested. Rufus looked up thinking that they had been compromised but found they were still very much alone. He looked down to Kim unsure of what she was thinking.

"I think I have a better idea…"

--

"The Temple of the Great Monkey Seal," Sensei announced to his student warriors. Ron crotched in the lead position holding the Lotus Blade. Sensei, Yori, and Hirotaka right behind him using the jungle to shield their presence. Everyone seemed to be waiting on Ron to come up with the plan while they watched the temple's entrance anxiously.

Before anyone could ask what the next move should be, a small pink rodent cautiously made his way out of the front of the temple and crossed the open space instinctively knowing where to find his human partner.

"Nice going, little buddy," Ron praised as Rufus jumped into his waiting palm. "Where's Kim?"

"Inside," the naked mole rat squeaked before placing his paws over his head in the manner in which Kim was tied up. He added a couple winks to let Ron know that everything was just fine. With a pleased grin, Ron took the battle staff that Yori was holding for him and handed it to Rufus.

"All-right," Ron said standing to his feet resolutely addressing his allies. "We're going in. You guys know what to do."

"Stoppable-san," Yori called after him as he and Rufus began their charge on the temple. The blonde halted and allowed her to engage him away from the others.

"Before anything happens," Yori started solemnly. "I wanted to apologize for my attitude about you and Kimberly these past couple days."

"Oh, come on, Yori," replied a comforting Ron. "You don't have to say you're sorry. I would have taken it a lot harder than you…"

"Still, my behavior was unbecoming of my life's training."

"Hey, we're all good," the sidekick sympathized taking her hand. Making eye contact with the vulnerable young ninja, he couldn't believe he was about to, more or less, give her the same heart lifting speech he gave Kim just a few months prior. "Look, K.P. is the greatest thing to ever happen to me, but I still think you're a really special girl. And there are plenty of guys out there that are better for you than me…"

"Really?" Yori asked touched but not yet believing.

"Really," Ron affirmed looking past her and noting the anxious interest on Hirotaka's face. "You just gotta know where to look."

A moment passed between the pair.

"Thank you, Stoppable-san," the young warrior said smiling for a change. "It is an honor to call you my friend."

"Same here," Ron said with a blush as Yori's smile turned into confident determination.

"Now let's go kick some monkey butt!" Yori said with zeal followed by a positive "Yeah!" from Rufus.

* * *

Being a veteran of countless long stints as a maniacal villain's captive, Kim had developed several techniques to deal with the prolonged periods of waiting. One of which was planning her cheer squad's new routines. She was just putting the finishing touches on a new pyramid, making sure to 'feature' Bonnie on the bottom in the back, when her eyes opened to the ever so faint sound of movement coming up one of the entryways.

"Ron!" Kim exclaimed as quietly as she could as her best friend and his naked mole rat stepped out into the open weapons in hand.

"Hey, K.P.," he semi-whispered back as he made his way towards her. "How's it hanging?"

"Ha-ha!" the redhead scoffed. "Just get me out of her before Monkey Fist gets back."

"Now where would the dramatics be in that?" the simian obsessed Englishman cackled jumping out of his hiding place and cutting off Ron from Kim. Behind him, one of the gorillas lumbered out of a different entrance to safe-guard Kim as the remaining monkey ninjas sealed off all exits. The odds were now decidedly stacked against the heroes.

"I'll give you one last chance to surrender," Ron demanded in spite of his position.

"Tragically funny to the last," came Fist's cold reply. "Hand over the Lotus Blade and I may grant you mercy in my reign as Supreme Monkey Ruler."

"Not a chance," defended Ron getting ready to stand his ground against the monkey man and clutching the blade even tighter.

"Then I'll just have to take it by force," the villain snarled.

"Ron! Look out!" Kim shouted desperately, but it was too late. By the time Ron turned to see what Kim was trying to warn him about, the second armored ape's fist smashed into him sending his sword sliding across the floor.

Catching his breath, Ron got to his hands and knees in time to see Fist stop the blade's slide with his foot.

"That was all too easy," Monkey Fist said smugly as he picked up the sword.

The former English lord almost couldn't believe his good fortune as he took his place on the Great Monkey Seal ready to reveal his destiny to the world. Kim, too, couldn't believe what she was seeing hoping that this was somehow part of Ron's plan. Suppressing his urge to burst into maniacal laughter, Fist held the sword and the scroll out in front of him. Closing his eyes in anticipation, he attempted to break the scroll's wax seal.

To say he was shocked to see that nothing had happened after the mutated villain opened his eyes would be an understatement. Despite a healthy attempt at opening the seal, the wax held fast. Fist's agitation became apparent as he examined the sword he held in his hand. Concentrating, Monkey Fist tried to will the sword to change shape. Again, nothing happened.

"It's a FAKE!" he bellowed tossing the imposter away at the realization he'd been fooled.

"Sike!" shouted Rufus as a brilliant blue light turned his staff into a set of nunchucks.

"Relieve that wretched rat of the Lotus Blade!" Monkey Fist commanded his monkey minions. The naked mole rat was instantly beset upon by a storm of hooded fur. The second gorilla, now with nothing else to do, also joined the attack only to be cutoff by an elderly man with a flowing white beard and two teenaged ninja students.

With every single one of his demands now being violated, the brooding Englishman decided it was time to follow through on his threat.

"Smash the girl!" he ordered the other gorilla before setting his sights on Ron who was still recovering from the blindsided shot he had received.

The gorilla reared back its fist ready to deliver a crushing blow to Kim, but as he swung forward, the redheaded teen heroine tugged on a loop of the rope and slipped free. The giant ape smashed his knuckles painfully into the stone wall. Kim wasted no time making a charge at Fist who was presently menacing towards her boyfriend. Leaping into a flying kick, Kim delivered a blindside shot of her own on the monkey man driving him into the ground and knocking the scroll into the air. Coming to an, as usual, graceful landing on the other side of him, Kim plucked the wax secured parchment from the air.

Being a fighter of the highest caliber, Fist was on his feet in no time with aims to take the scroll back. Kim readied her best defensive posture waiting for Monkey Fist's attack. However, someone else had different plans.

"He's all mine, Kim," Ron stated seriously stepping between the two combatants.

"How noble of you," Fist jabbed. "Coming to the defense of your lady. Don't worry, I'll be sure and save something for her after I've finished you!"

"Just bring it," growled Ron as the two arch foes launched into each other. Kim could only watch as the two exchanged blows. For a brief moment, she thought she was the only one in the entire fight without an opponent. She realized she was wrong, of course, as the gorilla that had just tried to smash her tried again. The cheerleader avoided being pummeled with a swift last second move and braced herself for some heavy action.

"I must say," Fist grunted as he threw a chop at Ron. "Sensei has done an impressive job in the short time he's trained you."

"Thanks," replied Ron blocking the chop and snaking out a kick of his own. "I'll be sure to pass that along when we're done."

"Scoff all you want," his mutant foe countered blocking Ron's kick. "But that's nothing compared to…"

"…a lifetime of devotion," the blonde interrupted as he landed the first punch of the engagement. "If I had a naco for every time I heard you say that, I'd never go hungry again."

With an angry 'grrr', Monkey Fist volleyed a flurry of combinations forcing Ron into a purely defensive pattern.

To the average observer, the Battle Royal for monkey supremacy would be the absolute last place one would want to venture forth into. However, when you're a slightly off-center genetic scientist who thinks nothing of flaunting the laws of man and nature with an extreme love for collectible plush, such things tend to not register correctly.

"Yooowhooo!" DNAmy said walking into the eye of the storm with a tray of what appeared to be drinks. "Who wants freshly squeezed lemonade?"

The 'boldness' of such a question caused all of the fighting to come to a screeching halt. Most of the combatants looked at the homely woman dumbfounded. Ron, who had now locked hands with his arch foe wrestling for position, released himself from the lock.

"Come to think of it," he said whimsically. "I'm pretty thirsty."

Ron was the first to arrive at the tray and partake in the refreshments. He was soon joined by one of the gorillas, several of the monkey ninjas, Yori, and Sensei each appreciatively taking a cup.

"My! My!" the otter-fly wearing woman observed. "You all are working up a sweat! Rude old Monty didn't tell me he'd be having so many friends over. Otherwise I'd have made some more!"

As the last of the drinks were finished and returned to the tray, DNAmy sauntered out the door humming as if she were a successful southern hostess. As everyone else returned to where they had stopped fighting, Ron found Fist where he had left him. The furry simian expert was scowling with his arms crossed and his foot impatiently tapping the floor.

"Where were we?" Ron asked playfully.

"I believe right about here!" Monkey Fist replied throwing a punch in Ron's direction as all across the temple, the battle resumed. Unfortunately for the blonde, he wasn't ready and was knocked back as his arch foe went on the offensive. The difference in skill was becoming apparent as Fist forced Ron back across half the floor – the sidekick barely able to block each incoming blow. Still, the lack of a landed blow further infuriated Monkey Fist and he pressed harder. Finally, one kick extended too far past Stoppable-san's head. Ron felt like he was moving in slow motion, just like the epic climax to _Bricks of Fury IX: Law of the Brick_, as he seized a surprised Monkey Fist's ankle and spinning like a top, hurled him towards the wall. His arch foe was stunned as he faceplanted against the solid stone falling to a heap at its base.

Turning quickly to the rest of the melee, the blonde haired teen hero saw Kim fighting one of the gorillas, scroll safely in her hand to the left of the seal; Rufus using the Lotus Nunchucks to batter the monkey ninjas to the right; and the third gorilla close to being over powered by Sensei, Yori, and Hirotaka in between him and the Great Monkey Seal. Knowing it was a now or never moment, Ron pushed off into a sprint faster than he had ever sprinted before. Jumping as he got to the back of the second gorilla, he used its shoulders as a springboard, catapulting him towards his target.

"Kim! Rufus! Now!" he shouted in mid-air.

Seeing his friend flying into position, Rufus willed the Lotus Blade into its normal form and threw it towards where Ron was going to land. Kim agilely ducked another crushing punch from her attacker before tossing the scroll in the same direction. Reaching out with both hands, Ron caught the scroll and the Blade before making a one-kneed power landing in the middle of the Monkey Seal.

Instantly, a brilliant white light exploded from the rim of the Seal, the scroll, and the Lotus Blade. As the humans in the temple shielded their eyes, the gorillas and monkey ninjas fled in terror at the supernatural spectacle. A column of light surrounded Ron as he was lifted off the floor. Above him, a powerful ethereal figure strongly resembling the statue of the school's founder in the courtyard appeared.

Kim struggled to block the light from her eyes so she could see what was going on. She could make out that the figure above Ron was saying something, but she could not hear the words over the roaring sound that accompanied the light display. After a few moments of the 'man' talking, Ron appeared rather confused and looked as though he had asked a question. Shaking his head a bit, the spirit tried again. This time, Ron grasped whatever it was that he was being told as he put the idea in his own terms. The floating figure sighed and gave Ron the 'close enough' look before vanishing along with the light allowing Ron to float back to the ground safely.

"That. Was. Badical!" Ron exclaimed after a moment of shocked silence from the witnesses. Kim, Rufus, Yori, and Hirotaka swarmed him in awe.

"What happened? What did he say?" Kim asked at a near fevered pitch.

"Nothing much," Ron replied rather nonchalantly. "Just congratulated me on being the 'Chosen One', and how I've got many paths and choices to make. And then he said something about how my greatest challenge would come in small bundle - whatever that means… And that was basically it."

Sensei raised an eyebrow at Ron's last statement, but as he joined his students, he made no further inquiries about Ron's encounter with the school's spiritual founder.

"Once again you have proven your honor, Stoppable-san," Sensei praised. "Your victory is well deserved."

"Ah, thanks, Sensei," Ron blushed. "But I couldn't have done it without all of you guys."

As the congratulations began to be exchanged, Ron caught sight of a sinister figure standing near one of the exits.

"This isn't over yet, Ron Stoppable," Monkey Fist grimaced putting a damper on the jovial mood. "I'll be back. You can count on it…," he added before retreating into the shadows.

"Like a weed that never grows," Ron quipped.

--

Kim and Ron walked hand in hand through another spectacular Yamanouchi morning. Many of the students had set about cleaning up the damage from the previous day's battle. Skirting the school's courtyard, the couple came to a stop as they watched Yori, with a cautious smile, helped Hirotaka carry a large wooden beam away – perhaps standing a bit closer than just friends would. Satisfied with himself, Ron turned to his girlfriend.

"So, when does Hero Boy get a congratulatory kiss?" he asked hopefully.

"We're calling ourselves 'Hero Boy' now?" Kim asked back with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, I could stick with 'Chosen One'…," Ron noted. Kim considered the two options a bit before reaching a conclusion.

"I think I like Hero Boy," she said drawing him in for his requested kiss. But before lips made contact, Kim pulled back.

"Wait, where's Rufus?" she inquired seriously. A nefarious smile appeared on her boyfriend's face as he indicated to the location of his naked mole rat.

"He may have been persuaded to become a double-agent," Ron said slyly. Kim looked over her shoulder to see the pink rodent snoring on an empty sushi tray rubbing a distended gut. With her father's spy compromised, Kim committed fully to rewarding her Hero Boy. Unfortunately, neither teen felt the kiss lasted near long enough before it was interrupted.

"Stoppable-san," the voice of the school's master forced the two apart with a small pair of blushes. "There is still much training left to accomplish," Sensei added as he walked past the two indicating Ron should follow.

"Wha…?" the blonde replied in confusion. "But the mission's over. We won. Monkey Fist lost. Right?"

"Well," Kim said breaking hands with him and following the wise old man. "We've still got a couple more days before school starts and I'd kinda like to get a lesson in with Sensei myself."

Ron hunched forward shocked at the notion of further training.

"Ah, man! Can't we just go shopping in Tokyo instead?" he objected to no avail.

The redhead continued down the path but turned to motion him to follow. Ron had one last desperate idea, but he was fairly sure it wouldn't work.

"I'll let you bring my mother!"

Confirming the offer had no effect on either Kim or Sensei, Ron grumbled as he started off after them.

* * *

_Next time on _The Geneticist and the Monkey Man_!_

Donning an apron in a typical suburban kitchen, DNAmy happily set about making a full breakfast. Descending down the back stairs, Lord Monkey Fist wearing a business suit and a fedora joined her.

"Amy, have you seen my briefcase?" the monkey man asked flatly as he poured himself a cup of coffee.

"I think so, puddin'," she answered flipping the omelet she was working on. "I saw it down in the basement last night."

With a sigh, Fist made his way to the basement door and entered the dark space. Once at the bottom of the stairs, he did his best to grope around without turning on the light, but after knocking a few items over and running into something unexpectantly large, he grabbed for the chain to the light bulb and clicked it on.

At more than twice his size, the unnatural cross between a canary and a bangle tiger glared back at him inches from his face frothing at the mouth.

Up in the kitchen, DNAmy plated the omelet seemingly oblivious to the screams, growls, and shredding sounds coming loudly from the basement. She just kept humming as she began buttering the English muffins. From the basement entrance, a scratched, tattered, and otherwise ruffled Fist emerged amazingly enough with his briefcase. He desperately used it to beat back the mutant freak that had followed him up the stairs. With a final shove, he gave up on the briefcase in exchange for getting the door closed.

"What is that… _thing?!" _he panted leaning against the door.

"Tigerary!" the homely geneticist sang as she put breakfast on the table. "He's my cuddliest-uddliest creation ever. Though he's just a bit cranky in the morning…"


	9. A Court Date Story

So, a funny thing happened between this update and my last one. I sort of had my film career take off on me. Aside from shooting an assortment of commercials locally, I've done two short films (one of which I am almost done with; info to follow soon). But the bulk of my time has been occupied with editing a feature length film. The last three months have left almost no time for writing as all my creative energy went to one film project or another. Good for my desire to become a director. Bad for my fan fiction. But with the conclusion of the real Season 4 last month, I was inspired to push through and get back to writing again.

A mega-shout goes out to Molloy for serving as my deadline enforcer and cheerleader as I churned this episode out. There'll be a gift basket from Henchco on your doorstep soon...

And if you haven't made your way over to read RonHeartbreaker's _Diplomacy in Action_, you have made an error in judgment. Please correct this as soon as possible.

Thanks to MrDrP, cpneb, Pharaoh Rutin Tutin, JPMod, Isamu, CajunBear73, The Real Sidekick, Molloy, Stand Alone Battle A.I, Akinyi, Cobrafire, Magnatron The NR Fan, Danny-171984, and XyKPfan for reading and reviewing. All reviews will be responded to by yours truly. Enjoy!

_Kim, Ron, and all other characters within belong to the Walt Disney Corporation... Unfortunately._

* * *

_Episode 8:_ _A Court Date Story_

_by Ultimate Naco Topping_

* * *

"Shego!" Dr. Drakken yelled with a mixture of panic and frustration. "Stoppable's heading for the De-Atomizer Cannon!"

His green-skinned henchwoman ducked a size seven shoe with mere inches to spare and devoted a small portion of her precious concentration to her boss's plea.

"Kinda' busy here, Dr. D.!" she growled back as a fresh wave of punches and kicks originated from a red blur and accelerated in her direction.

From halfway up the steel ladder to the control platform of the De-Atomizer Cannon, Ron Stoppable wiped the tear from his eye as he watched the battle below. The grin on his face could not have been larger.

"K.P.! Dr. Drakken remembered my name! Did you hear him…? Kim…?"

"Kinda' busy here, Ron!" Kim called as a trail of green plasma rocketed past her face leaving ozone and singed hair in its wake.

Watching Ron resume his ascent to the control platform, Drakken felt nauseated at the looming foil of yet another evil plan.

"_She_-go! He's going to get to the controls!" he whined.

A hard blow to her gut sent Shego flying before she landed hard on her back. Her frustrated growl was more from Drakken's continued prattling than from Kim's well executed roundhouse.

"Then order the henchmen to stop him!" the villainess said as she rolled to avoid a fist to her jaw. "That's what they're paid for, aren't they?"

--

The normally empty dock on the shore of Dr. Drakken's island lair was full of henchmen from Local 417 busily signing new recruits, lounging around drinking refreshments, or engaging in lighthearted conversation. And of course, there was the large contingent of men walking in a circle with signs on their shoulders ranging from 'No Dental Plan - No Work' to 'Evil Bonuses Now!'

--

"We're having a small squabble over compensation!" Dr. Drakken shouted as green and red swirls moved viciously against each other on the lair's main floor.

With Shego being of no help, the evil genius's eyes darted back to check on Ron's progress before desperately searching for anything to turn the tide. The nefarious glint returned to his eye as he spotted his plan's salvation. Drakken ran to a cabinet and quickly riffled through its contents producing various broken gadgets and remote controls before...

"Aha!" he cackled confidently pointing a small brown remote in Ron's direction. The blonde once again halted his ascent to view the new threat. "You think you can be all that like your girlfriend, sidekick, but let's see how all that you think you are after this!"

With enough smugness to fill the Los Angeles Basin, the blue-skinned villain smashed his thumb on the button and looked with anticipation at four wooden crates in the corner of the room.

From his precarious perch, Ron watched as a garage door in the opposite corner of the lair whirled to life and began to open before simply returning to climbing the ladder. Realizing that the contents of the boxes were not controlled by the remote in his hand, Drakken turned to see the garage door continue to open revealing his striking underlings circling outside. Releasing a loud 'Grrr!', he pressed the button to close the door and went back to look for the right remote.

"Oy!" Shego declared with one eye on Kim and the other on her grumbling employer. "I am this close to joining the picket line myself..."

As Ron crested the ladder and stood on the cannon's control platform, Drakken finally produced the appropriate remote. With an evil sneer, he hit the button. Immediately, the four wooden crates exploded sending splinters and lumber everywhere forcing Kim and Shego to shield themselves from the debris. The two combatants looked up to see a quartet of standard model synthodrones activate and present themselves to Dr. Drakken.

"Oh look, Kimmie, they're just your type," Shego verbally stabbed. Her redheaded opponent bristled before letting out a rare roar. Her words hitting their mark better than her plasma bolts, Shego enjoyed a predatory smirk as Kim made a ferocious charge.

"Synthodrone 887 awaiting orders," the lead drone said lifelessly.

"Stop the buffoon!" Drakken yelled pointing up to the cannon's controls.

On top of the platform, Ron held his fist under his chin tapping his foot as he looked over the De-Atomizer Cannon. The noise of the exposed gears of the cannon spinning what appeared to be a magnet around a focused beam of light did not help his concentration.

"Why is there never a properly labeled 'off' button?" he said before giving a shrug and proceeding with his standard procedure for disarming doomsday devices: messing with everything.

"Halt, buffoon," ordered a monotone Synthodrone 887 as he landed with his three counterparts on the control platform. Ron spun only to be horrified by what he saw. He was now surrounded by his third worst nightmare right behind a national ban on cheese and his girlfriend melting into green goo at prom.

"Syntho... drones...," he barely whispered.

Four sets of glowing green eyes locked onto the sidekick as the drones advanced steadily towards him. The blonde's muscles began to freeze as he tried to yell for help but couldn't. The situation looked dire as the artificial henchmen tightened their formation before a loud, though high-pitched, growl stopped them. Leaping out of his human's pocket, Rufus shot like a missile across the ground towards Synthodrone 887 - his front teeth glistening like daggers ready to bite. The naked mole rat coiled and jumped towards his target expecting to hit pay dirt, but instead hitting glass. Two tiny gloved hands slammed the lid of the jar over the top and screwed it shut.

"Not this time, weasel thing," Drakken sneered holding his irate little captive to his face. Rufus shook his paw at the evil genius and angrily squeaked something that sounded like 'It's mole rat!'. Dr. Drakken ignored him and turned back to Ron. "Game over, buffoon!"

"Ah, come on... Back to buffoon?" Ron replied as his feared turned to annoyance. "Is a little consistency in name-calling too much to ask for?"

"I'll call you whatever I want when I'm ruling the world! Get him!" the self-proclaimed doctor said redirecting his synthodrones to attack Ron.

Down below, Shego blocked a chop from Kim and responded in kind only to have her own punch miss its mark. The two women were forced to clamp hands together face to face in a struggle for domination.

"What are you, my sister all of a sudden?" Kim asked with a grunt continuing their 'conversation'.

"Look, princess," Shego retorted similarly strained but breaking the deadlock in her favor. "All I'm saying is I don't get you two, that's all."

"I don't have to justify our relationship with you," Kim spat back as she turned the tide back in her favor. "Ron and I are...,"

The shrill shriek of a siren cut her off before she could finish. Red lights began to pulse throughout the lair. They were accompanied by the all too familiar hum of a doomsday device that was about to have a power overload.

"Warning! Overload eminent! Refer to product manual for proper operation parameters. If problems persist, call the Henchco Customer Service 800 number. Standard rates and tolls apply," a computer voice calmly stated.

Kim and Shego looked up to see Ron and Drakken hit the ladder at the same time wedging themselves stuck between the railings - two synthodrones flanking them. A terrified Rufus could do nothing as his jar was now the object of tug-of-war between sidekick and villain.

"Out of my way!" Drakken hollered tugging Rufus's jar.

"Not until you give back my weasel thing!" Ron shouted yanking Rufus back towards him. Neither side relented each straining to take the jar from the other completely ignoring the looming threat of incineration. One final tug was all it took to slip the jar from both pairs of hands.

"Rufus!" Ron shouted as the jar hurtled to the floor with its terrified passenger.

In one seamless move, Kim planted her foot in a distracted Shego's midsection, jumped, and fired her grappler. As soon as the hook ripped into the lair's ceiling, she hit the retract button and rocketed upwards meeting Rufus halfway. With the jar of naked mole rat secured, Kim landed on the ledge near the De-Atomizer's control platform.

"Nice catch, K.P.!" a thankful Ron exclaimed. Before he could turn his attention back to his predicament with Drakken, the evil genius placed his hand in Ron's face and shoved him back onto the platform clearing the ladder for himself. With all the grace of a landing albatross, Drakken made his escape behind Shego.

"Time to go, Ron!" Kim shouted over the noise of the alarms and overloading cannon. Kim held out her arm to catch her boyfriend as he made the small jump from the platform to the ledge. They quickly ran to the ledge's end and kicked the utility door open. The two remaining synthodrones followed right behind them.

The lair shuddered as the two teens jumped down the embankment just outside and slid to the jungle floor below. The concussion of the De-Atomizer Cannon's explosion propelled them down the hill tumbling through the dirt and random bushes before finally coming to a rest at the edge of the island's dock.

The blonde and the redhead barely had time to stand and dust themselves off before they noticed the striking henchmen gawking at the now burning lair.

"Good thing we're on strike," one of the larger henches called out with a whistle.

"Just be glad we don't have to clean it up this time," joked another. A third henchman noticed the two synthodrones who had come to a stop next to Kim and Ron and approached them.

"You two must be new," he said shaking their hands. "Let's get you guys signed up."

The two teen heroes watched in stunned silence as the two drones looked at each other, shrugged, and followed the henchman to the main table to write their 'names' and collect their picket signs.

* * *

"To being Seniors!" Monique toasted with her Bueno Nacho beverage cup.

"Here! Here!" Kim said returning the toast.

"And not having to work at Club Banana full time," the raven haired beauty added before taking a bit of her chimerito.

"Your connections to the grapevine have been missed."

"T. T.," Monique said drawing an inquisitive eyebrow from her best friend. "Oh, sorry, that's a new one: _true that_. Speaking of the grapevine, time for you to dish the dirt."

"About what?" Kim asked with a fork full of a naco salad.

"You... Ron... Dating..."

Kim's eyes darted away as she set down her fork in favor of a nervous sip of her drink. Monique instantly had a sinking feeling.

"You two are still dating, right?"

"Yes!" Kim declared. "It's just that..., well..., we haven't really gone on anything you could call a date..., yet."

"You mean it's still missions, Bueno Nacho, an hanging out as usual?" Monique said in a tone that bordered on disgust.

"Yeah, pretty much," the redhead groaned.

"Uh, Kim, a critical element of 'dating' is going out on actual dates."

"I know," Kim said with a squirm. "I'm just waiting for Ron to make a move, that's all."

"Okay, no offense but..., are you crazy?! You're Kim Possible. Take control! Or at least you could _tell_ him to take you out."

"I could, but then he might think that I think he can't handle a relationship or change and, well, you know how sensitive he can be about change..."

"The Guaco Naco?!" Ron shouted at the register drawing the attention of everyone in the fast food eatery. "What are you guys doing to my baby?"

Kim kept one eye on Ron as he engaged in a debate over the new menu item with Ned. Monique shifted back to their conversation.

"Well, if the direct approach won't work, you could try giving him subtle hints," the Club Banana manager said drawing another look from Kim. "Okay, not my best piece of advice. We're just over thinking things. Stick with the direct approach."

"Maybe you're right," Kim said leaving room for Monique to give her a look of her own. "Okay, you're probably right."

"And here's your chance to prove it," Monique said standing up just as the blonde haired sidekick arrived at their booth with a tray of food. "Gotta run. Oh, by the way, Ron, Kim's got something she wants to say."

Walking away, Monique flashed a toothy smirk to a wide-eyed Kim as Ron took his seat.

"What's up K. P.?" Ron said wasting no time in chowing down. "This isn't about that biological experiment I helped your brothers with, is it?

"No...," Kim started nervously. "Wait, what biological experiment with my brothers?"

Ron choked on part of his naco coughing violently. It took a hard shot to his chest from Rufus to clear his throat. The blonde stuttered searching for a plausible cover story while getting a stare down from his girlfriend. Nothing believable came to mind.

"All I can say is avoid your bathroom for a couple weeks... At least until after the germination cycle."

Kim groaned as she rubbed her temple. As gorchy as whatever was happening in her bathroom, she had more important matters to deal with.

"Ron, what I wanted to talk to you about is us," Kim said timidly. As expected, Ron almost choked on another bite of his naco. Kim quickly continued. "But not in a bad way. It's just that now that we're dating, I thought maybe we could start going on actual... dates."

"But we do dinner at Bueno Nacho and a movie all the time. That counts, right?"

"Well, yeah. Sorta. Not really. I'm talking about going someplace special."

"K. P.," Ron said defensively. "Bueno Nacho _is _special."

"Oh, and you're right, but Bueno Nacho is just _regular_ special. I want to go someplace _special _special."

"_Special _special?" Ron asked. "Okay."

"Ron!" Kim whined. "What's wrong with... Wait. Did you say 'okay'?"

"Yep," said Ron unwrapping a complimentary guaco naco. "My bon-diggity lady wants to shake things up a bit? I'm down with that."

"Spankin'..., I guess," the redhead said cracking a smile at the ease at which she was able to convince her boyfriend. For once, Ron had agreed to a change without making a scene. Well, almost...

"Ewwyuck!" Ron gagged spitting out his guaco naco. "One thing I am _not_ down with is the guaco naco! Excuse me; I have to go make a scene."

With that, he left Kim to sulk as he went to track Ned down at the front counter.

--

The portly business assistant looked at the document in his hands and sighed. He hated the constant stream of bad news it was his responsibility to disseminate. Thankfully, his boss wasn't a tyrant, but that didn't make the job any easier.

"Come in," the company founder said noticing his assistant hovering in the doorway.

"I've got the final report on the De-Atomizer, Mr. Hench," the assistant said entering the room and taking a seat.

"You mean there was something left to analyze?" Jack Hench said with a touch of shock.

"No," countered his assistant. "But we were able to get some good data from satellite scans."

"And?"

"Well, readings showed that it was functioning normally... Until, of course, it blew up."

"Do we know the reason why?"

Before the assistant could answer, the call box on Hench's desk buzzed.

"_There's a Dr. Drakken on line two for you, sir,_" the secretary announced. Hench shuddered in anger.

"Yippee," he said through clinched teeth before hitting the button for the speakerphone. "Jack Hench."

--

"I want my money back!" Drakken yelled into the phone cradled between his ear and shoulder. The blue-skinned villain was precariously balanced on top of a ladder attempting to secure a tarp over the gaping hole in his lair's roof.

"_In order for me to give you a refund, you would actually have to pay for something," Jack sighed._

"Don't get technical with me, Hench," Drakken growled nearly losing his balance. "Your De-Atomizer Cannon was defective. It blew a whole in my roof the size of Cleveland."

"_That's about the size of the hole you and that Shego woman put in our warehouse when you stole it," Hench countered._

"Is this your idea of customer service?" Drakken asked jerking suddenly as the ladder swung out from under him. With uncharacteristic agility, he desperately latched onto the edge of the tarp leaving him dangling in the air.

"_For you to be a customer, you have to buy something first," the Hencho founder said with his patient waning._

"Ah, ah! I bought the Attitudinator from you, remember?" the evil genius said as he heard the tarp begin to tear.

"_Really? I remember your check bouncing," Hench countered._

"So you admit that I intended to pay!"

"_That wasn't my point..."_

"I demand to know what you're going to do about this!" Drakken shouted as the rip in the tarp slowly began to give way.

"_Nothing," Jack said with a smirk that he shared with his assistant._

"What?! This is no way to treat an alleged customer!"

"_So sue me!" Hench declared before slamming the button to disconnect._

Drakken gasped at the sound of dial tone forgetting about his situation.

"No one hangs up on Dr. Drakk-eeaaan!" he screamed as the tarp finally gave way swinging him at high velocity into the wall. The wall cracked on impact, but held together. A groaning Drakken slid down the side before landing in a clump on the floor - the tarp floated down on top of him.

After a minute or two of groaning and struggling, Drakken emerged from under the remains of his makeshift roof.

"'So sue me!'" Drakken sneered as he dusted himself off. He picked up the remnants of the phone with disdain before tossing the pieces aside. A couple deep breaths seemed to calm him down.

"Sue me...," he said again with a half-chuckle. Slowly, the anger turned to thought which turned into serious consideration. Finally, the evil glint returned to his eyes as a sinister grin crossed his face.

--

"He didn't even realize he was accidentally trying to conquer Paris, _Texas_ until after Kimmie had lassoed him!"

The henchmen of Local 417 exploded into laughter at their newest member's story. Even the two synthodrones let out monotone 'ha, ha's' at Shego's anecdote.

"Shego!" Drakken hollered from a large hole in the side of the lair. "Quit fraternizing with the help and get up here!"

"Actually," Shego sassed as the men began to line up behind her. "I've sort of been elected their spokesperson."

A series of unintelligible grunts and growls emanated from the evil genius's lips as his blue skin turned purple.

"I don't have time for this," Drakken gritted through his teeth. "I've just had my most diabolical plan ever!"

"Well, you heard the man," the union spokeswoman said. "He doesn't have time for us. I wonder if Dementor is hiring...?"

"Arrgh! Okay! What do you want?"

"A dental plan, bonuses, and flex hours," Shego confidently stated.

"And a karaoke lounge," one of the henchmen whispered to her.

"Absolutely not!" she bristled flashing her plasma. The offending hench quickly zipped up.

"I understand the dental plan and the bonuses, but what the heck is a flex hour?" the blue-skinned villain inquired.

"Don't know, but it's on the signs," Shego responded holding up a 'Flex Hour Freedom!' poster. Their employer took it all in as he appeared to be formulating a response.

"Hrrmm..., I'll spring for the dental plan and tack on casual Friday," he offered. The henchmen instantly began buzzing with serious consideration.

"Stick together boys," Shego commanded. "He's just lowballing."

The villainess's words calmed the men down winning their resolve. Employer and employees now locked in a staring contest - eyes narrowing and sweat forming beads on foreheads. Nature around them silenced as the tension built until finally...

"Fine! I'll give you everything," Dr. Drakken conceded. Celebratory shouts and high fives broke out amongst the men. Even Shego enjoyed the moment, but it was short lived. "Now back to work! The lair's not going to clean up itself."

"Sorry, boss," said one of the larger henchmen calmly. "But we're taking our flex hour."

With that, the henchmen of Local 417 dispersed leaving their employer to steam with clenched jaw and fists in the rubble of the collapsed wall.

"She-_Go_!"

She wanted nothing more than to join the henchmen on their flex hour - maybe hit the tanning bed - but that wretched little voice in the back of her head stopped her. Normally she wouldn't think twice about pushing her boss's buttons and leaving him to stew, but sometimes even she had to have a little sympathy for him. She didn't know why, but she blamed Hego for pushing his goodie-two-shoes lifestyle on her growing up.

"Calm down, I'm coming," she moaned as she made her way up the hill and through the rubble back into the lair. Once inside, she silently followed Drakken into the kitchen. As the blue-skinned villain began rummaging around in a cabinet before producing a phonebook, Shego decided to grab a beverage from the refrigerator. She watched as he flipped through the pages obviously not finding what he was looking for.

"You know they alphabetize those things, right?" Shego said popping the top of her bottle.

"Yes!" Drakken defended trying to make it look like he hadn't forgotten that fact.

"Okay, I know I'll regret asking, but how does the phone book fit in with taking over the world?"

"Oh, we're not taking over the world."

"We're not?!" Shego said coughing on her drink.

"No."

"But if we're not taking over the world, how is this your most 'diabolical' plan ever?"

"Because," the mad scientist said with an evil grin. "We're going to need a lawyer..."

The bottle Shego was holding fell to the ground shattering glass and splashing liquid everywhere. The former hero was left speechless.

* * *

The anticipatory tingle started in Kim's gut the moment Ron said he had special plans for Ron Night. It built through lunch causing her to loose her appetite - not at all a bad thing considering the cancellation of the senior menu in the cafeteria. Afternoon classes were wasted with great delight speculating in her mind on all the wonderful places Ron could be taking her. By the time she was putting up her books after school, the redhead had worked herself into a nervous, but excited, frenzy. The squeals of joy she shared with Monique over the news didn't help to calm her.

Kim's regard for traffic laws on the way home was spotty at best. She sped most of the way, blew through a couple yellow lights, and made a rolling stop at a stop sign before making it home in near record time. Mrs. Dr. P. caught her on the stairs as she flew by and instantly recognized the look on her daughter's face. The Possible matriarch set out to run interference on her father and brothers allowing Kim to primp uninterrupted.

The teen hero took a quick shower before examining every inch of her face for potentially inflamed pores; her teeth received similar treatment. She wished that Ron had announced his intention earlier in the week so she could have worked in a quick eyebrow wax at the mall before she set about the chore manually. With a towel still wrapped around her hair, she evaluated each item in her closet coming up with a _no, no, no, maybe, no, gross, no, I thought I gave that to charity, no, maybe, what was Nana thinking, and when did Ron leave the Fearless Ferret costume in here? No, wait. _Why_ did Ron leave the Fearless Ferret costume in here?_

The standard garments being essentially rejected, Kim looked herself in the mirror to bolster her confidence. _It's our first date..., officialy..., again..., _she thought. _I think that calls for the big guns._

Kim pushed aside the unwanted outfits to reveal the palm scanner at the back of her closet and placed her hand on top. With a woosh, the secret compartment opened revealing the white and blue battle suit. The seventy-five million dollar project was quickly tossed in the same discard pile as all her other clothes as she got her hands on the original reason for the construction of her secret compartment - her little black dress.

The accessories and matching heels were quickly found. Make up, though rarely used by the teen and conservatively if so, was applied with the desired result. Some extra care was spent on her hair to give it extra bounce and she was down the stairs just in time to collect Ron and save him from Black Hole Talk version 2.0.

She was a bit disappointed he hadn't dressed up to the level that she had, but wrote it off in an instant. She tossed him the keys to the Coupe and promised to keep her eyes shut until they got to wherever they were going. The redhead's stomach fluttered with each turn and stop as she fought the temptation to open her eyes. She kept them shut even as the Sloth's power cells shut down and Ron helped her out. She kept them shut even as they walked through the parking lot to the front door. She kept them shut even as the smell of burnt cheese filled her nostrils. She kept them shut even as the sound of arcade games rattled her eardrums. She kept them shut even as she heard a goofy cartoon voice say, "Welcome to J.P. Bearymores!"

Most would call it denial. Kim called it giving the benefit of the doubt. Ron's idea of _special_ special could not be a place built for the twelve and under crowd. Ron was just pulling a practical joke. Or he was running an errand. Yeah, that was it. He had secretly been working there and was just picking up his check so he could take her on their real date. What a relief!

"Okay, Kim, open your eyes. We're here!"

She kept them shut.

--

_Whack!_

_Whack!_

_Whack!_

Rufus gulped. He wanted to flee for the safety of Ron's pocket but he was too terrified to move. He could only watch as his human's mate unleashed a volley of hits against his defenseless brethren. One by one, they would pop out of their holes only to be viciously slammed by a mallet wielded by the cheerleader's combined speed and strength.

With a final authoritative 'thwack!', Kim finished her third perfect game of Whack-A-Mole in a row. As she set down the mallet, the machine began to print her tickets which went uncollected. Sighing, she turned around and leaned up against the game and scanned the crowd for her boyfriend before finding him lining up another shot at Skee-ball. For an older game not involving a joystick and zombies, he turned out to be rather skilled at it as evidence by his own pile of tickets.

"Oh. No. He. Didn't," Monique said as she joined Kim in the Whack-A-Mole corner. The raven haired beauty crossed her arms for emphasis.

"He did," Kim groaned.

"I…, He…, You can't just…, Oh! That boy's got me speechless!"

"You seem more upset about this than I am."

"You sure about that?" Monique countered pointing to Kim's pile of uncollected tickets. "If I were you, I'd set him straight ASAP."

"I thought about it, Monique, but I don't think it's a good idea."

"Um, what?"

"Look, Ron's there for me when I need him to be. And he's trying. That's good enough for me. But dating? It's just not in his skill set," Kim said reflectively. Monique shifted to give her BGFF a look over for a moment.

"You want me to pull him aside and give him a crash course in romance, don't you?" she asked fiendishly.

"Show no mercy," Kim said eyes narrowed. A moment passed as Monique began plotting out her lesson plan. Kim decided on a change of topics. "So, what exactly are you doing here? On a Friday night?"

"My car broke down," Monique said snapping out of her thoughts.

"Your car broke down? How would that mean…"

"Hey, car monkey!" Tim called with a giant stuffed bear in his arms.

"We're bored! Time to go," Jim finished dashing towards the door. Monique bristled giving her friend a harsh stare.

"You could have warned me, Kim," she said before marching out the door to fulfill her contractual obligation. Despite her sympathy for Monique's situation, Kim had to suppress a smile.

"Hey, was that Monique?" Ron said sliding up beside Kim with his hands behind his back.

"Sadly, yes," Kim said flatly.

"You know, we should find her a boyfriend. I wonder if Josh…," Ron stopped mid-sentence as his girlfriend gave him a sneer. Sensing a threat to his survival, he quickly changed the subject. "Hey! Look what I got you."

From behind his back, Ron presented Kim a small plush animal. Kim's contempt instantly melted as she took the creature in her hands. The creature's armadillo head flowed into its duck shaped body producing a form that only a Cuddle Buddy Collector could love.

"Remember when we came here one time when we were ten and you tried to get him but didn't have enough tickets…,"

"…And you gave me your tickets but I still didn't have enough. And then you promised one day you'd get him for me…," Kim said staring at her new armaduck (or duckadillo depending on which side one took after the great Cuddle Buddy Naming Rift of 2002).

"Better late than never, huh?"

Kim bit her lip as she looked at the enigma that was her boyfriend before gathering him in a warm hug. Capable of such an incredible gesture while at the same time committing such a colossal blunder, it couldn't be called romance. A more fitting term would be Ronmance. And it was beginning to grow on her. As Kim broke the hug, she was about to make a mental note to call off Monique and her crash course, but before she could commit any brain cells to the idea, they were interrupted.

_Beep-beep. Ba-beep,_ the Kimunicator chimed. Ron fished it out of his spare pocket and handed it over to Kim.

"What's the sitch, Wade," Kim said with contented smile.

"Just giving you an update on…," the boy genius started before noticing what he was seeing. "Are you at J.P. Bearymore's…? In a dress…? On a Friday night?"

"Yeah, what's the big?"

"Well, you're smiling…"

"I'll take credit for that," Ron said pushing his way onto the screen.

"Right," Wade said regretting he brought it up. "Anyway, update on Drakken. You're never going to believe this."

"Do we ever really believe anything when it comes to Drakken?" Kim mused.

"Good point, but this is completely whack, even for him," said the tech guru. A couple of taps of his key board pulled a live television feed onto the Kimunicator's LCD.

"_My next guest…,"_ said the typical talking head cable news host. "…y_ou may remember as the mastermind behind the 'lil Diablo disaster and from his guest appearances on shows like _Evil Eye for the Bad Guy_ and_ Happy Time Corner_, Dr. Drakken._"

Kim and Ron looked quickly at each other mouths open then back to the screen to see their arch foe in a neck brace seated next to an oddly familiar young man.

"_Joining him is his attorney, Hank Perkins."_

"_Glad to be here," _Hank said cheerfully.

"_For the record, I didn't willingly appear on…," _Drakken started before his lawyer covered his mouth with his hand_._

"_Let me do the talking…," _he whispered to his client. Drakken was visibly miffed by the gesture, but appeared to silence himself.

"_Now, you're here tonight because you are suing Jack Hench and Henchco for damages stemming from the failure of a De-Atomizer Cannon. Is this correct?"_

"_It is, Bill,"_ Perkins began. _"We feel the Mr. Hench and his company as a whole should be held liable for the damage caused by their product and the suffering it has brought to my client."_

On cue, Dr. Drakken nodded his head looking as much like a scolded puppy as someone as evil as him could.

"_Okay," _the host responded. "_What about the charges that your client _stole_ this De-Atomizer Cannon in a plot to take over the world_?"

"_Bill. Bill. Bill. That's just Henchco spin trying to shift blame away from themselves. My client didn't 'steal' the De-Atomizer so much as he took it for an unauthorized free trial. And haven't we all tried to take over the world at some point? Just because my client didn't technically pay for the product doesn't mean Hench shouldn't be held accountable for manufacturing flaws does it?"_

"_I can see your point," _the host said sharply. "_Thanks for coming. In our next segment, we'll have a workplace advocate on to explain a new trend called the 'Flex Hour' and what it could mean for you."_

"_Wait, that's it?"_ Dr. Drakken managed to say before Wade cut off the transmission.

"Okay, he's officially lost it," Kim said in semi-shock. "It's an open and shut case. Drakken didn't know how to use the De-Atomizer and it blew up. You were up there with him, right Ron?"

"Um, yeah," the blonde replied with a nervous tick in his voice. Both Kim and Wade looked at him with a touch of suspicion. "Open and shut. So why hasn't this case been dismissed?"

"Because everyone's entitled to their day in court," Kim groaned. "Even Drakken."

"I'll keep an eye on this for you Kim," Wade said.

"Please and thank you…"

--

The plush interior of the Henchco corporate waiting room was sophisticated yet comfortable. Soft music played to ease those that had to wait. The secretary typed away and answered the phone. Kim made the most of her time as she scribbled away on her math homework. Ron made the least of his by looking over a brochure.

"Did you know," Ron began reading it aloud. "That Henchco has been the leading supplier of the world's super villains for the last fifteen years?"

Kim, for the most part, ignored him.

"That's longer than we've known each other! And look at this: every Henchco Henchman® goes through a boot camp that's tougher than the Marines!"

"So that's what makes them so tough to beat," Kim said dryly without looking up.

"And it doesn't stop there. They put more money into genetic research last year than all of Europe combined."

"Let's hope that doesn't come back to haunt us…"

"Mr. Hench will see you now," the secretary said politely prompting Kim and Ron to pack up and move towards the CEO's door.

The two teen heroes stepped into the office to be greeted by Jack Hench who rose to shake their hands.

"The venerable Team Possible," the arms dealer said warmly. "Thanks to your work, super villains across the world are spending like never before.

"Our pleasure," Kim understated.

"By the way, did you get our 'thank you' gift basket?"

Kim's eyes narrowed as she released the handshake.

"No," the redhead said confused. "You sent a 'thank you' gift basket?"

"Funny," Hench said giving his assistant a glare. "I could have sworn we did..."

--

"_I have a package for a Kim Possible," the deliveryman said. "Say, would that be _the _Kim Possible?"_

"_No," said Jim sarcastically._

"_You want the other Kim Possible down the street," Tim finished._

"_Just sign here," the package handler grumbled. Jim grabbed the clipboard and signed as Tim took the large basket wrapped in plastic and ribbon._

_As the deliveryman returned to his truck, the twins took a closer look at the package. Their eyes sparkled as they saw an assortment of hand held blaster rays, incendiary devices, illegal decoders, and other forms of villainous gear._

"_Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Tim asked._

"_That Kim's never going to get this basket?" Jim answered._

"_Hicka-bicka-boo…"_

"_Hoo-sha!"_

_The twins darted back into the house with nefarious intent. Moments later, a small explosion blew the garage door into the street._

--

"Okay, I have no idea what this is, but I want one," Ron said looking over a small radio controlled robot. Mr. Hench walked over and enthusiastically picked it up going into full demonstration mode.

"It's called the Infiltrator – the first product out of our new corporate espionage division. Send it into your competitor's ventilation ducts and it gathers everything you need to know about their business."

"Coolio! Does it work?"

"Tested flawlessly in the real world. What would you like to know about Pop Pop Porter's new line of Meals on a Stick?"

"Everything," Ron said breathlessly.

"Ahem, hate to be rude," Kim interrupted. "But we're skipping our lunch break at school. Could we get to the reason you called us?"

"Of course," Jack said setting the Infiltrator down. "I called you because I need your help again."

"Unless it's converting your operation to peaceful applications, I doubt it."

"Please, Ms. Possible, hear me out. Would you say that you've dedicated your life to justice?"

"Yes," Kim said.

"And that if someone were falsely accused of something and you knew the truth, you wouldn't hesitate to set the record straight?"

"Yes," Kim said again through clinched teeth. She knew were the sleazy businessman was headed and she didn't like it.

"Excellent, then you'll testify on our behalf against Dr. Drakken over this whole De-Atomizer nonsense," Hench said. Ron's head jerked to attention. Kim remained stoic.

"No."

Hench looked to his assistant in shock before turning back to the teen heroine.

"But, Ms. Possible, it's just not...,"

"Sorry, Jack-baby," Ron nervously cutoff Hench wrapping his arm over his girlfriend's shoulder and swinging them both towards the exit. Kim gave him a suspicious look but went with it. "But Kim said no and she's in charge. Gotta respect a girl with principles. Oh, look at the time, we'd better run..."

With no warning, the two teens collided with a hulking mass of a man with no neck filling out an extremely tight business suit. He glared down at them as his hairy knuckles clasped two brown envelopes.

"I'm sorry it had to come to this," Jack Hench said menacingly.

The hulking man handed Kim and Ron each an envelope. The blonde and the redhead opened them quickly before looking at each other in shock. Kim spun to face Hench eyes blazing.

"You subpoenaed us?!"

"You left me no choice," Jack said with a sly smile. "See you at the trial."

--

The late afternoon sun was losing its power as it slid towards the horizon. The Middleton High football players were thankful for the break in the heat and that practice was winding down. Releasing her squad earlier, the cheer captain had remained behind to proudly watch the football team's newest star take reps at running back. Only the familiar beep of her all-purpose communication device could grab her attention away from her boyfriend.

"What's the legal sitch, Wade?"

"Hench's lawyers dotted every 'i' and crossed every 't'. You and Ron have to testify."

"Great," Kim groaned. "Are you sure there's nothing you could hack or some loophole we could use to get out of it?"

"Sorry, Kim," Wade said sympathetically. "I've checked. Besides, I already used up my one ethically questionable deed for the month."

Kim raised an eyebrow at her tech guru before she ventured a guess.

"New tracking chip for Ron?"

"The real-time telemetry is..."

"I think I'd like to be kept out of the loop this time. Thanks anyway, Wade," Kim said before tossing the Kimunicator onto her gym bag. She had no chance to turn back to watch practice before practice came to her.

"Kim! Look out!" a fully padded Ron exclaimed barreling towards her after just catching a pass near the sideline.

Fortunately, the redhead's lightning quick reflexes allowed her to flip backward off the bench into a backflip and away to safety. Unfortunately, she cleared a spot on the bench for Ron to get a gutful of pine knocking the wind out of him before he slid to the ground.

"Ron! Are you okay?" Kim shouted as she quickly knelt beside her boyfriend.

"Aside from my internal organs being rearranged, I'm fine," Ron barely managed as Kim helped him up. Still in pain, the blonde removed his helmet but otherwise showed no ill effects. As the two teens began to engage in conversation, neither noticed a shady set of eyes watching them from under the bleachers.

"So," Ron said getting his breath back. "What do you think of the new offense, K.P.?"

"I think it could be better…," Kim said. Ron looked a little hurt. The redhead moved closer putting her arm over his shoulder before continuing. "…if they started handing the ball to their star running back more."

"Ah, you don't really mean that," Ron blushed looking away from Kim. She responded by grabbing his chin and forcing him to look at her.

"Oh, but I do," she said. Eyes locked, bodies leaned, and lips puckered before...

The shrill scream of a whistle jarred the two teens back into the real world.

"Possible!" Coach Barkin barked. "I haven't spent all week trying to toughen up your boyfriend for the big game on Friday only for you to make him go all soft again!"

"Sorry, Mr. Barkin," Kim said making herself as small as possible.

"Okay, time to hit the showers," Barkin declared sending the football team off the field and to the locker room, some of them snickering as they past the two teens much to their embarrassment. Soon, Kim and Ron were alone.

"Sorry if I got you in trouble with Barkin," the cheer captain said.

"Eh, it's nothing new... Wanna hit Bueno Nacho in an hour?"

"Can't; family game night with Larry and Aunt June," said Kim with narrowed eyes. Ron faked some sympathy before she pecked him on the cheek with a kiss.

"See you tomorrow," the redhead said before collecting her gym bag and heading back to the school.

The blonde let out a contented sigh as he watched his BFGF saunter away unaware of the eyes that were watching him. Picking up his helmet he began to stroll back to the locker room. As he entered the walkway under the bleachers, a set of hands popped out of the shadows holding a small canister of Kissy Girl lip gloss. Before he could react, a purple hazed rushed into his nostrils. The boy's body went limp falling forward only to be caught by another set of hands that dragged him into the shadows.

Having watched everything take place, the shadowy figure slowly revealed herself by stepping out of the darker corners of the bleachers. Seeing the methods used by her conspirators quickly sent her into a panic.

"Jim! Tim!" Monique started. "I just wanted you to capture him, not knock him unconscious!"

"Hey," Jim said with annoyance. "You're not our only client, you know."

"Wade contracted us to install Ron's new tracking chip," Tim smiled holding up what looked like a modified staple gun.

"Ron can't know about it…"

"Hence: knock out gas!"

"Okay…," Monique said. "But why would Ron need a secret tracking… Never mind, I answered my own question. Let's just get him to my car before anyone sees us."

--

Slowly, light began to trickle into his eyes. As the blur slowly began to fill in, Ron noticed several things. First, he was in someone's basement. Second, he was tied to a chair. Third, there was an annoying stinging sensation at the base of his neck.

With his senses restored, he began to run down the who's, what's, and why's of his kidnapping. Drakken immediately sprung to mind, but he would have been there when he woke up to gloat, so he was out. Dementor was a possibility, but he would be in a much nicer setting. Monkey Fist would have been more theatrical when he captured him so he was out as well. The Seniors would have left him dangling over some nasty peril so it couldn't be them. But before he could cross another villain off his list, the basement's door swung open.

The stairs creaked and groaned as his captor descended methodically towards him. Ron instantly recognized the stylish Capri's as none other than his girlfriend's best girl friend's. Monique half glared and half smirked at him as she hit the bottom of the stairs and faced her captive.

"Okay," Ron began in near panic. "I don't know what this is, Monique, but if this is some desperate ploy to win my affections, I'd like to remind you that I'm dating Kim."

"You call what you two are doing 'dating'?"

"Yes... Okay, there are some gaps we could fill in, but I don't see how that involves you taking me prisoner. Besides, if Kim were upset about things she'd...," Ron paused as the realization hit him. "She'd tell you every detail, wouldn't she?"

Monique nodded empathetically.

"Oh, man, I really messed up, didn't I? Kim must think I'm the worst boyfriend ever."

"So, do I have your attention now?"

It was Ron's turn to nod. Satisfied with his sincerity, Monique untied him.

"Good, then I expect you here after school everyday. I'm going to turn you into a lean, mean, romance machine..."

--

"_Our top story tonight," started the national news anchorwoman. "Is the sensational trial opening today in Middleton between evil genius Dr. Drakken and businessman Jack Hench. We now go live to the courthouse steps to Action News correspondent, Ray Porter."_

--

As he began his report, the courthouse steps behind Ray were a surging mass of his fellow journalists and cameramen shoving and shouting for the chance to get a question to the major players. Team Drakken pushed their way through the crowd pleading for space for the 'injured' mad scientist to climb the steps. Hank Perkins cheerfully shouted the typical statements of confidence in their case. Shego occasionally flared her plasmic abilities to ward off any microphones from being shoved in her face.

At the top of the steps, Jack Hench's high-powered defense team congregated together a much less appealing target for the beat reporters. They watched with mild annoyance as a second swarm of hard-hitting journalists formed as Kim and Ron arrived at the courthouse.

--

The courtroom sketch artist quickly began drawing Dr. Drakken, neck brace, crutches, and all as he took his place on the stand. The bailiff moved to administer the oath.

"Please state your name for the record."

"Dr. Drakken."

"I'm sorry," the judge interrupted. "But evil aliases are inadmissible. Please give us your full legal name."

Drakken soured and grumbled but quickly remembered where he was. Still, he was hesitant.

"Drew Polonius Lipsky..."

A wave of laughter swept through the courtroom. Before the judge could restore order, Kim, Ron, and Shego all stole a look from each other knowing they would get a lot mileage out of that little tidbit. Drew Polonius Lipsky scowled.

"Order," the judge said with a final bang of his gavel. "Bailiff, proceed."

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?"

"I do," the evil genius said with a grunt.

"Your witness, Mr. Perkins," said the judge. Hank sprung from his seat and crossed the room to his client.

"Dr. Dra... Er, Mr. Lipsky, was this the first time you've used a Henchco product?"

"No."

"What other products from the defendant have you used?"

"Objection," called one of the high-powered attorneys for Henchco. "Is this relevant?"

"It goes to establishing Henchco's history of shoddy workmanship, your honor," the young attorney answered.

"Make it quick," the judge cautioned. "The witness may answer the question."

"I was given a free demonstration of the Attitudenator at the Villains Expo in Middleton last spring."

"And what did Mr. Hench guarantee it would do for you?"

"He guaranteed it would make me absolutely evil."

"But what happened instead?"

"It made me..., good."

Hank glanced at the jury to see raised eyebrows and notes being scribbled down. They appeared to be buying what he was selling.

"Now, could you describe the events leading up to the malfunction of the De-Atomizer Cannon?"

"Yes," Drew began as he turned to address the jury with doe eyes and as much pain in his voice as he could muster. "I was just about to conquer..., I mean, bring a new order of peace and tranquility to humanity..."

--

_Drakken's lair looked bright and cheerful and well kept instead of its usual dark, dank, and dingy. At the controls of the De-Atomizer, an amiable looking Drakken smiled as he operated the levers. Behind him, two synthodrones with shock sticks guarded a handcuffed Kim and Ron._

"_So, what do you think of my latest plan?" Drakken asked as he turned towards the teen heroes who, instead of looking defiant or amused, looked fearful_

"_How could we ever think we could defeat your genius?" Kim said._

"_Have mercy on us in your impending reign," Ron added._

_Before Drakken could smile any wider, Shego joined them on the platform and handed him a tall glass with a dark liquid inside._

"_Here's your Cocoa-Moo, Dr. Drakken," Shego said happily. Drakken took a satisfied sip before turning back to his doomsday weapon._

"_Now, all of you shall bear witness to...,"_

_Before he could continue, a shrill siren interrupted him as the cannon began to hum with an impending overload._

"_Warning! Overload eminent! Refer to product manual for proper operation parameters. If problems persist, call the Henchco Customer Service 800 number. Standard rates and tolls apply."_

_Panic swept through those in the lair as it became every man, woman, synthodrone, and mole rat for them self._

"_Someone get me the phone!" Drakken shouted._

"_There's no time, we gotta go!" Shego yelled back as she followed Kim and Ron off the platform. Drakken slid down the ladder and, in a panic, scanned the lair for the phone. Finally spotting it, he ran as fast as he could towards it..._

--

"And did you make it in time?" Perkins asked delicately leaning on the witness stand. The jury leaned off the edge of their seats. Drakken turned to them directly to give his greatest performance.

"No...,"

The jury leaned back obviously lending sympathy to the blue skinned villain. Some looked towards Hench and his attorneys with a touch of contempt in their eyes. For his part, Hench crossed his arms and rolled his eyes.

"Your witness," Perkins said before taking his place at the plaintiff's table. Hench's attorney rose but did not move from behind his spot.

"Mr. Lipsky, if you've had such a horrible track record with Henchco products, why do you continue to steal them?"

"Objection!" Perkins shot up.

"Sustained," the judge said.

"No further questions," Hench's attorney said confident he had made his point.

--

"Please state your name for the record."

"Shego."

"Again," the judge said. "Your legal name please."

"That is my legal name," Shego bristled. "My brother had us legally change to our 'hero' names when we were kids for 'team unity'."

"Very well," replied the judge with a nod to the bailiff.

"Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, so help you God?"

"Yeah, sure, whatever."

"Miss Go," Hank Perkins said rising from his chair. "Would you please tell us about when you picked up the De-Atomizer Cannon from Henchco for your unauthorized free trial?"

"If you insist..."

--

_The warehouse floor of Henchco Industries stretched as far as the eye could see. Various forms of doomsday weapons, armored vehicles, and evil contraptions filled the floor. Three figures, dwarfed by the monstrous surroundings, approached the De-Atomizer Cannon._

"_So," Dr. Drakken said reading a fancy looking brochure. "Can it really break the sub-molecular bonds?"_

"_Yes," Jack Hench sighed with annoyance. Hoping to help complete the sale, Hench's wiry chief scientist chimed in._

"_The beam can be focused as small as a human hair or as wide as a city block and hit a target up to fifty miles away..."_

_Drakken wrung his hands with glee._

"_What kind of payment options do you have, Hench?"_

"_Cash. Only."_

_The blue-skinned villain briefly looked miffed at such a restriction but quickly forgot it._

"_I'll take it!" he declared with a wide grin. At first, Hench and his scientist raised their eyebrows in shock, but as Drakken remained nearly motionless, both men looked confused. After a moment of nothing happening, Drakken's grin faded._

"_Excuse me," he said before walking a few steps away and turning his back to them. They watched as he got out a cell phone and began to whisper angrily into it. Finishing his private tirade, the evil genius rejoined his hosts wearing another fake smile._

"_I'll take it!" he said again._

_This time, his words were followed by a ceiling-shattering boom. Twisted metal, insulation, and other debris rained down. Through the smoke and dust, Drakken's henchmen slid down ropes dangling from several black helicopters. As Hench quickly moved to get his security team, his chief scientist tried his best to flee. He got no more than five steps away before a green and black blur seized the front of his jacket._

"_Where's the manual?" Shego growled in his face._

"_What do you mean?" the terrified scientist asked._

"_You know, the manual..., with the instructions!"_

"_There isn't one."_

"_What do you mean there isn't one?!"_

"_Mr. Hench spent the whole print media budget on the brochures," the man explained holding up the glossy fact-filled flier._

"_Shego!" Dr. Drakken called from his perch on the De-Atomizer Cannon. "Time to move!"_

_With an evil smirk, Shego tossed the poor scientist aside and began to sprint towards the now stolen property._

"_Later, Jacky-boy," Shego said with a sadistic wave as she passed Henchco's owner before leaping onto the cannon. The helicopters throttled up and with a tremendous groan, lifted the De-Atomizer Cannon up into the night sky._

--

"A powerful doomsday weapon but no instruction manual," Hank Perkins said dramatically to the jury. "I have no more questions."

The members of the jury looked towards Jack Hench with steely eyes. All the world's leading supplier to super villains around the world could due was duck his head and rub his temple.

"Does the defense have any questions for the witness?" the judge asked.

"We do not, your honor," Hench's lawyer said quickly standing and sitting.

"Very well, court is adjourned."

--

A legal assistant held the conference room door open for Drakken to limp through on his crutches. Shego and Hank followed him in. No sooner had the door closed than did the blue-skinned villain dump the crutches and toss his neck brace aside.

"We really creamed them today, Perkins," an excited Drakken said, emphasizing his elation by wrapping his arm around his lawyer and giving him a squeeze.

"We sure did," Hank blushed as he extracted himself from the embrace.

"And cue the impending failure," Shego said dryly from one of the plush leather chairs. The villainess swung her feet onto the table and began to sharpen her gloves.

"Were you even in the same courtroom, Shego?" Drakken objected. "Why the pessimism?"

"Oh, nothing much except your long track record of blowing it."

"Actually," Hank interrupted. "We may be able to quit while we're ahead."

Both Shego and Dr. Drakken looked at him with interest. The young lawyer pulled a card from his jacket and scribbled a note on it.

"I just fielded a generous settlement from Hench's attorneys," he said handing the note to Drakken. The mad scientist looked at it with contempt.

"Not interested," he said. Immediately, his henchwoman snatched the note out of his hand. As soon as she saw the figure written on it, she turned to her boss in utter disbelief.

"Are you insane?! Wait, don't answer that. But remember how you wanted to take over Canada? With this kind of cash you could buy it!"

"As your attorney, I must urge you to take this deal," Perkins pleaded.

Drakken walked away from them with a grunt.

"Hench dangles a little carrot in front of our noses and you both want to bail? Show a little backbone. We've got them on the run! No deal."

Hank hung his head. Shego made a rare consolation patting him on the shoulder.

"I tried," she said.

* * *

Monique watched her pupil with steely eyes waiting for his response. Four days of intensive instruction on the in's and out's of romance had taken almost as much toll on her as it had on Ron. For his part, he had tried his best to absorb what the raven-haired beauty was trying to teach him, but between football practice, Drakken's trial, and homework, patience was a valuable commodity for both teens at that point.

Ron squinted his eyes as a bead of sweat rolled down his forehead. His mind ached to find the answer. His gut told him one thing, his heart another. Rufus, standing on a stool next to Monique, quivered with exhaustion hoping for his human to answer so he could put the flash card down.

"Ron...," Monique prodded. "The Lowerton Cheese Symposium."

The blonde's lip quivered. He knew what the right answer was now, but to say it would leave him a feeling of betrayal. But under his friend's piercing stare, he couldn't hold out any longer.

"Not romantic," he finally cracked. Monique made a mark on her clipboard as Rufus grabbed the next card marked with the words _Chez al la R'orange_. This time, the answer came more quickly.

"Romantic," Ron said confidently. Monique made her marks again and Rufus grabbed the next card: _Candlelight_.

"Romantic."

The next card read _Gazeboes_.

"Romantic."

_Role Playing Games_.

"Not romantic," Ron grumbled.

_Giving Kim Flowers for No Reason_.

"Very romantic."

_Cow'n'Chow_.

"Not romantic."

Rufus held up the final card: _Talking About Your Feelings_.

"Romantic," Ron said through his teeth. Monique made her final mark and began to tabulate the results. When she finished, she looked at Ron who was nervously waiting for his grade.

"Ron," Monique said adding a dramatic pause. "You passed."

"Boo-yah!" he exclaimed.

"But your not done yet. There's still one more test."

"What's that?"

--

The gentle glow of candlelight flickered in the transformed basement in Monique's house. Bed sheets covered up the junk and boxes being stored away. In the middle, a space had been cleared for a table and two chairs. A couple candles and some wine glasses added an elegant touch.

Two teens descended the stairs both dressed nicely. Monique wore a dress with a simple cut, but its vibrant red matched her to-much-for-you-to-handle-boy personality. Though the temptation to break out his powder blue tux was great, Ron managed to dust of his old spy suit from mentor week. And as an added touch, his hair was neatly slicked back.

At the bottom of the steps, the duo stopped at the makeshift host stand and were greeted by a young man half their height.

"Good evening," Jim said in an oversized tuxedo. "Do you have a reservation?"

"Stoppable, party of two," Ron said smoothly. Kim's younger brother grabbed a pair of menus and escorted them to the table. Taking the initiative, Ron pulled out Monique's chair. The Club Banana manager blushed as she sat.

"Before you say anything," a young man who looked like Ron Stoppable in many respects, but was acting nothing like him said. "That the candle light makes your eyes sparkle."

Monique blushed again and batted her eyelashes completely caught off guard by her pupil's compliment. Before she could respond, a second young man in an ill-fitting tux approached their table.

"Thank you for joining us tonight," Tim said with an almost sarcastic grin. "I will be your waiter. Our featured items are a delectable veal marsala served over angel hair pasta and grilled salmon with a teriyaki demi glaze."

Smoothly and confidently, Ron looked towards his 'date' and then back to Tim.

"The lady would like to try the salmon and I will order the veal."

"Excellent choices, sir," Tim said before sliding away.

Ron leaned back with one arm draped on the top of his chair looking as suave as a secret agent. Monique had to keep reminding herself that this was only a test.

"Would you care to purchase a rose for your date, sir?" Jim asked holding a bouquet of fresh red roses.

"Of course," Middleton's newest lady-killer said. Jim handed him a rose, which he immediately handed to an impressed Monique.

"Can this night get any more romantic?" Monique asked.

"I believe it can," Ron said with a snap of his fingers. They were soon joined on the tabletop by a naked mole rat in a red tuxedo brandishing a miniature violin. Once again, Monique gawked as the tiny rodent began to play. Ron had obviously done his homework.

Dinner was served shortly thereafter. The conversation remained light and jovial. The evening was capped off by a slice of chocolate smothered cheesecake. With the date concluded, Monique conferenced with Jim, Tim, and Rufus in the corner of the basement. As Ron waited nervously, he ruffled his hair back into its normal position and undid his bow tie. It didn't take long for the verdict to come in.

"Ron," said Monique as she broke the huddle and stepped towards him. "Whatever you do, don't tell Kim, but if she were ever crazy enough to split up with you, I just might be tempted to take you for myself. Congratulations, you've graduated Dating 101."

"Have fun on your dates with our sister," Jim said mockingly before joining Tim in dramatic gagging noises. A stern look from Monique sent them flying up the stairs. The young woman gave Ron another smile before starting for the steps herself.

"Now go find Kim and make me proud."

"Hey, Monique," Ron said stopping her on the second step. "Thanks."

"It was no big," she said with a shrug before resuming her climb.

--

Everyone in the courtroom stood at attention as the judge made climbed up to the bench and took his spot.

"Be seated," he ordered. "Is the defense ready to proceed?"

"We are, your honor," Hench's lead attorney responded. "We would like to call Kim Possible to the stand."

A slight murmur passed through the courtroom as the redhead got up from beside her boyfriend and her parents and made her way to the witness stand. Although she looked somewhat cross for the intrusion the trial was having on her life, the bailiff swore her in without incident and Hench's legal team took over.

"If it pleases the court," he began. "We would like Ms. Possible to be recognized as an expert in the field of super villain behavior."

"Any objection from the plaintiffs?"

"None, your honor," Perkins said quickly. Next to him, Dr. Drakken was once again in his neck brace and cast giving the teen hero on the stand a sneer.

"Very well, let the record indicate the witness as an expert. Proceed, counselor."

"Ms. Possible, in your experience, what are some of the reasons for a super villain plot to fail?"

"Well," Kim sighed. "Most of the time I would say incompetence."

"And in the case of the plaintiff?"

"I'd say all of the time."

"Now, Ms. Possible," Jack's lawyer said crossing the courtroom with a photograph. "Do you remember this device?"

Kim took a closer look and had no trouble recognizing it.

"Yes, that's the ray gun Drakken built using the Pan Dimensional Vortex Inducer."

"And what was its intended purpose?"

"I believe he was going to blast Ron and me into oblivion with it."

"What did it do instead?"

"It sucked all of us into a dimension consisting of popular television shows."

"Is this kind of improper use of equipment common place by Mr. Lipsky?"

"All the time."

"And who would you say, then, is responsible for the failure of the De-Atomizer Cannon?"

"Objection!" Hank said standing up. "That's leading the witness."

"I'll rephrase. In your expert opinion, Ms. Possible, is the plaintiff's incompetence responsible for the incident in question."

"One hundred percent positive."

"Thank you. I have no further questions."

"Mr. Perkins?" the judge asked prompting Hank to his feet.

"Ms. Possible, could you recount exactly what you were doing at the time the De-Atomizer Cannon began to overload?"

Kim raised an eyebrow, as did many others in the courtroom. It seemed like a bad move on Hank's part to have her tell the jury what she had seen, but she began her answer anyway.

"Well, it just another normal mission..."

--

"_Oh look, Kimmie, they're just your type," Shego said with a twisted grin. Kim shuddered with rage as she turned away from the quartet of synthodrones and charged her nemesis._

"_Did I hit a nerve?" the green skinned villainess asked as she blocked Kim's attack._

"_They are NOT my type!"_

"_Oh right, you've moved on to lame sidekicks. Speaking of, how is rebound boy?"_

"_Ron is SO not a rebound!"_

"_Denial? Party of one?"_

_If she hadn't been having so much fun coiling Kim with rage, Shego would have taken advantage of the teen crime fighter's anger dampened moves. Instead, she kept up her verbal spat content to just go through the motions of fighting._

"_Seriously, what is with you two? Are you for real? The tabloids all say you haven't even gone on a date yet..."_

_Each woman through a series of punches in close quarters each, blocking the other by grabbing onto her opponent's fist. With neither letting go, each began to wrestle for domination._

"_What are you, my sister all of a sudden?" Kim asked with a grunt._

"_Look, princess," Shego retorted similarly strained but breaking the deadlock in her favor. "All I'm saying is I don't get you two, that's all."_

"_I don't have to justify our relationship with you," Kim spat back as she turned the tide back in her favor. "Ron and I are...,"_

_The shrill shriek of a siren cut her off before she could finish as red lights began to pulse throughout the lair. They were accompanied by the all too familiar hum of a doomsday device that was about to have a power overload._

"_Warning! Overload eminent! Refer to product manual for proper operation parameters. If problems persist, call the Henchco Customer Service 800 number. Standard rates and tolls apply," a computer voice calmly stated..._

--

"So, for the record," Hank asked. "You didn't actually see the De-Atomizer overload?"

"N-no, but...," Kim hesitated.

"Then how did you know that it was my client that was to blame?"

"Well, I..., uh..."

"No further questions," Perkins said letting the teen hero's uncertainty play for the jury. Drakken resisted the urge to jump to his feet and gloat in Kim's face but instead gave a smug look to Shego. His employee rolled her eyes and went back to filing her gloves.

--

Ron Stoppable tried his best to hide his shaking knees and hands as he took the witness stand. He nervously glanced past the bailiff to his now sulking girlfriend join his and her parents in the gallery. He was so absorbed in what they would all think after he was finished that he almost forgot to confirm the oath with an "I do."

As Hench's lawyer went through the procedure to have him declared as an expert witness on the subject of breaking doomsday weapons, Ron glanced over at Dr. Drakken sitting smugly at the plaintiff's table. Much of the legal system went well beyond his range of understanding, but the blonde knew that after Kim's debacle on the stand, he was now the last line of defense against Drakken winning big.

"Mr. Stoppable," the high-powered attorney said bringing Ron back into the moment. "When you join Ms. Possible on your 'missions', what are your primary roles?"

"Well," Ron gulped. "I normally provide the distraction so Kim can take on the bad guys. Then I go try to take out whatever doomsday device Drakken's trying to use to take over the world."

"Uh-huh, and when you encounter a device built by the plaintiff himself, how hard are they to deactivate?"

"Not hard. I normally just kick it or trip over a cable or something."

Ron's answer brought the sneer back to Drakken's face. He wanted to jump up and shout 'objection!' and defend his craftsmanship, but Hank had made it clear beforehand such outbursts would be frowned upon.

"And what about equipment you encounter on your missions built by Henchco?"

"Well..., now that I think about it, they're normally pretty tough to break."

"Thank you Mr. Stoppable. Now would you please tell the jury what you saw on the day of the incident in question?"

"Why would they need to know that?" Ron asked with a cracked voice.

"Because this is lawsuit about what happened to cause the De-Atomizer to malfunction."

"Young man," the judge said firmly but not harshly. "I'm afraid you're going to have to answer the question."

Ron's mouth felt as parched as a desert as he looked out into the gallery and locked eyes with his girlfriend. His avoidance of the question had definitely set off her weird-ar as evidenced by her raised eyebrow.

"Mr. Stoppable," Hench's attorney prompted forcing Ron to turn his attention back to him. The blonde realized he no longer had any choice.

"Okay, here goes. I had just started to look for an 'off' switch..."

--

_On top of the platform, Ron held his fist under his chin tapping his foot as he looked over the De-Atomizer Cannon controls. The noise of the exposed gears of the cannon spinning what appeared to be a magnet around a focused beam of light did not help his concentration._

"_Why is there never a properly labeled 'off' button?" he said before giving a shrug and proceeding with his standard procedure for disarming doomsday devices: messing with everything._

"_Halt, buffoon," ordered a monotone Synthodrone 887 as he landed with his three counterparts on the control platform. Ron spun only to be horrified by what he saw. He was now surrounded by his third worst nightmare right behind a national ban on cheese and his girlfriend melting into green goo at prom._

"_Syntho... drones...," he barely whispered._

_Four sets of glowing green eyes locked onto the sidekick as the drones advanced steadily towards him. The blonde's muscles began to freeze as he tried to yell for help but couldn't. The situation looked dire as the artificial henchmen tightened their formation before a loud, though high-pitched, growl stopped them. Leaping out of his human's pocket, Rufus shot like a missile across the ground towards to Synthodrone 887 - his front teeth glistening like daggers ready to bite. The naked mole rat coiled and jumped towards his target expecting to hit pay dirt, but instead hitting glass. Two tiny-gloved hands slammed the lid of the jar over the top and screwed it shut._

"_Not this time, weasel thing," Drakken sneered holding his irate little captive to his face. Rufus shook his paw at the evil genius and angrily squeaked something that sounded like 'It's mole rat!'. Dr. Drakken ignored him and turned back to Ron. "Game over, buffoon!"_

"_Ah, come on... Back to buffoon?" Ron replied as his feared turned to annoyance. "Is a little consistency in name-calling too much to ask for?"_

"_I'll call you whatever I want when I'm ruling the world! Get him!" the self-proclaimed doctor said redirecting his synthodrones to attack Ron._

_The synthodrone closest to Ron lunged at him attempting to grab him in a bear hug. The sidekick ducked out of the way just in time. The goop filled goon's momentum carried him forward and impaling him on one of the De-Atomizer's levers. Green ooze poured out of both holes withering the synthodrone's shell._

_As Ron turned back to see the other three drones stalking towards him, he spotted Drakken by the platforms railing holding the jar with Rufus gloating over his impending victory. Ron Stoppable, sidekick, stepped aside letting Ron Stoppable, star running back take over, sprinting, juking, and spinning his way to the blue skinned villain._

"_Give him back!" Ron demanded as he collided with Drakken. The evil genius somehow managed to hold his ground putting a hand in Ron's face and keeping Rufus's jar out of reach._

"_886, go long!" Drakken shouted before hurling the jar of naked mole rat like a football. Planting an elbow in the self-proclaimed doctor's chest, Ron pushed off to chase down the 'pass' like a receiver. The shove teetered Dr. Drakken over the edge of the platform. At the last second, he barely managed to grab the railing saving himself from a nasty fall._

_Luckily for both Ron and Rufus, Drakken's wobbly throw wasn't going very far, though, it was headed for the open circuitry of the De-Atomizer. As a stretching Synthodrone 886 reached for the makeshift football, Ron timed his jump perfectly, bumping the drone out of the way, and intercepting his glass entombed buddy in the nick of time. The blonde tucked the jar under his arm and rolled to a landing. He popped up in the heat of the moment ready to rub it in the synthodrone's face only to watch the poor drone get caught in the gears of the De-Atomizer's spinning magnet. Ron's grin flattened as he watched the former synthodrone's body jam the gears with green goo. The magnet stopped spinning and the all too familiar hum of a doomsday device about to overload filled the air._

_Drakken, having just pulled himself over the railing, did not see the termination of Synthodrone 886 and failed to notice the De-Atomizer's malfunction, the loud hum, or the smoke. He did see Ron holding the jar with Rufus in it._

"_Ha!" Drakken declared as he snatched the jar back and hoisted it over his head. "You thought you could outplay me but..."_

"_Warning! Overload eminent!" the computer voice interrupted._

--

The judge banged his gavel several times in an effort to quiet the gallery's reaction to Ron's bombshell. Ron looked to Kim expecting some form of disproval but instead found her wearing a little smirk. Shego wore a similar smirk, but for obviously different reasons. Drakken, on the other hand, was anything but amused. All Hank Perkins could do was rub his temples.

"Order!" the judge said bringing silence back to his courtroom. With the crowd hushed, he turned to Ron. "Young man, would you care to explain why you didn't come forward with this sooner?"

"Uh, well," Ron stammered under the pressure. "I was afraid that when Drakken or Hench found out it was my fault, one of them would sue me instead."

"Sue you?" Jack Hench interjected. "I should send you a gift basket!"

"Don't even think about it!" Kim countered from the gallery.

"This court is still in session!" declared the judge with another bang of his gavel. "At least momentarily. However, in light of this new testimony, I have no choice but to dismiss this case."

The Henchco legal team was immediately swept up in congratulatory handshakes. The mood on the Team Drakken side was sharply different. The blue-skinned villain ripped his neck brace off and threw it to the ground.

"This isn't fair!" he shouted as he began stomping on it repeatedly. "I demand justice! Why must I always come... so... close..."

With a final stomp that amounted to more of a bunny hop, Drakken realized everyone in the courtroom had been watching his outburst including the judge.

"Mr. Lipsky," he began sternly. "Either you've just made a miraculous recovery from your injuries or you've been lying about your condition to this court. Bailiff, take custody of Mr. Lipsky on the charge of perjury and contempt of court."

--

"Are you serious?" Monique asked as she continued to fold the latest shipment of designer pants for sale at Club Banana. "He actually cried as they drug him out of the courtroom."

"Yeah," Kim said leaning against the display. "Kind of hard to have respect for him as an arch foe after seeing that."

"I hear you. And what about Ron?"

"Well," Kim sighed. "I'm a little disappointed he didn't speak up sooner, but I can understand why he didn't."

"Actually, I meant to ask if he's asked you out on another date?"

"We're going out tonight, actually," Kim said less than enthusiastically.

"And what's wrong with that? I thought you didn't care how you spent your time together," Monique prodded.

"The Lowerton Cheese Symposium started today."

Monique grimaced.

"I should probably get going anyway."

"Call me with the details," Monique requested drawing 'whatever, okay' look from Kim. As soon as the redhead exited the store, the young woman dashed to the register and retrieved her purse.

"Sandra," she hollered to the back room. "Family emergency. I've got to run!"

Not waiting for a reply, the raven-haired beauty dashed out the front.

--

Crickets serenaded the first comfortable night of Fall. Bathed in moonlight, two figures stopped at the base of a tree.

"Okay, Kim, you can take it off," Ron said holding her hand. With the other, Kim removed the blindfold. Her eyes adjusted and she quickly realized where they were.

"The tree house?" Kim asked skeptically, though she was completely relieved they weren't going to the Cheese Symposium.

"Trust me, K. P.," Ron said seriously before beginning to climb up. Kim sighed, but followed.

As soon as she poked her head through the floor, her heart jumped into her throat. Candles lit the tree house in a warm glow. In what little space there was, a small table was set for dinner. Rufus was dressed to the nines ready to server them.

"Oh Ron," Kim cooed as she finished climbing in. "What's all this?"

"Somebody may have clued me in that J.P. Bearymore's isn't the best place to take your girlfriend on a date," Ron said standing by the tree house's only window. "I hope this makes up for it."

Kim smiled softly as she crossed the floor to reach her boyfriend.

"Ron, you don't have to get all romantic for me to love you. All I care about is spending time with you. It doesn't matter how we spend it."

"Really?"

"Well, that doesn't mean I don't want you to be romantic sometimes," Kim said as she wrapped her arms around him. "But this is a good start..."

A chorus of 'boo-yahs' rang through Ron's head as Kim completed the hug. Ron glanced out the window and locked eyes with his dating mentor. He gave a thankful smile and a 'thumbs up' before hugging his girlfriend back.

On the ground below, Monique sighed with satisfaction at a job well done. Then she sighed at the realization that she now had nowhere to go and nothing to do for the rest of the night. However, a small rustle in the bushes seemed to be a good starting place.

"It's not working," Jim said tapping the base of his long-range microphone.

"I think the batteries are out," Tim said removing his earphones.

"Would either of you two like to explain to me what you're doing?" Monique said startling the twins, though they quickly recovered.

"Spying on the kootie festival up there."

"What does it look like we're doing?"

"Well, we would if someone had brought spare batteries..."

"Okay, time for Plan B."

"What's Plan B?" Monique asked. The two carbon copy brothers smiled nefariously.

"We made a couple modifications to Ron's tracking chip before we planted it."

"Real-time satellite feed. What Ron knows, we know."

"We just have to pull up the data stream back at our house. Wanna come?"

"Oh, please," Monique scoffed. "I'm not that desperate."

Jim and Tim looked at each other confidently before eyeing Monique again. It wasn't long before she cracked.

"I'll drive," she said before the twins scrambled out of the bush towards her car, leaving Monique alone with her thoughts for a moment.

_I have got to get a boyfriend_, she thought before chasing off after Kim's brothers.

* * *

As soon as the cell door slammed shut, Dr. Drakken used his tiny hands to grab on to the bars.

"I demand to take my flex hour!" he sneered pressing his face into the bars.

"Welcome back, roommate!" the annoyingly familiar voice of Frugal Lucre called. Drakken immediately slumped.

"So, what did they bust you for this time?"

"I'd rather not talk about it, Lucre."

"Oo! Did you try to take over the world with some diabolical scheme?"

"Hrmm..., no."

"Held some world leader for ransom?"

"No."

"Stole something really valuable and heavily guarded?"

"NO!"

"Attempted to blast your likeness into Mount..."

"Perjury and contempt of court! If you must know," Drakken shouted turning back to address his cellmate.

"Ooooh!" Lucre began with genuine reverence. "Taking it to the system!"

"I guess you could call it that," the evil genius said calming down.

"I tried to take on the system one time. Did I tell you about it?"

"Yes. Every meaningless detail. Several times."

"Okay, so there I was: Team Possible trapped in my mother's basement..."

With a groan, Dr. Drakken turned back to the cell bars and banged his head into them as hard as he could hoping that the rattling of his skull would block out the sound of Lucre's voice.

* * *

And now a special sneak peek at Ultimate Naco Topping's _Kim Possible: the Freshman Fifteen_! All events take place after Graduation...

--

"Four guys to one bathroom?!" Ron whined as he and Kim entered Go City University's Anderson Hall. "Even I think that's disgusting."

"It's the same way in the girl's dorm, Ron," Kim countered as they entered the lecture hall hand-in-hand.

"Yeah, but it's a proven scientific fact the girl's bathrooms are never dirty."

Both teens paused at the enormous scope of what laid before them. Their first day of college had more than demonstrated to them that the life they knew at Middleton High was never to be seen again. The two hundred-seat auditorium was nearly full forcing them to head for the undesirable front row. Neither liked the prospects of being taught College Physics in an atmosphere that amounted to a pep assembly.

"So who's teaching this class, anyway?" Ron asked as he caught the eyes of several of his fellow football recruits.

The first week had been extremely tough on all of them as they learned they were no longer the best player on their team. The freshmen players had to bond together for support if they hand any hope of one day starting for one of the premiere programs in the country. Between Ron's mad running away skills and the now well-publicized fact of him dating Kim, he had built a tremendous amount of street-cred with his teammates in very little time. The players gave him the customary nod from across the room, which Ron returned as manly as he possibly could.

"Don't know. The schedule just says 'staff'. So, I'm guessing we'll see the professor the first day and the T. A. the rest of the semester," Kim replied trying to find a familiar face in the crowd.

Unfortunately she did. The disapproving looks from her fellow underclassmen cheer squad mates made her almost release her grip on Ron's hand. He may have been on the football team and considered by many a great addition to the team, but to those in the social 'know', he was still an outsider. As if friends on the squad weren't hard enough to come by, Kim was surrounded by girls who had moves nearly equal to hers and were motivated by a cutthroat competition to make the final squad. Kim squeezed Ron's hand harder as they passed before finally making it to the bottom row and taking the first available seats.

Kim pulled out her notepad and her pen ready to take the first notes of her college education. Ron set about trying to coax the swinging table out of the side of his chair. With no luck, he gave up.

"So," he began casually. "Who do you think the first villain of the semester's going to be?"

"Probably not Drakken. He's still on his book tour."

"And it can't be Monkey Fist."

Kim tapped her pen to her chin in thought.

"I'm going with the Seniors. They're due. Who are you taking?"

"Hmm, even though I won last year with Professor Dementor, I think I'm going to go out on a limb and pick Killigan."

"You are so wrong," Kim joked.

"Wanna bet?"

"The usual?"

"You know it...,"

Their conversation, along with every other one across the room, came to a sudden halt as the doors at the base of the auditorium swung open dramatically. Two hundred sets of eyes turned to see an unusual looking man walk into the room. Some snickered at his short stocky appearance, his yellow skin, his flamboyant outfit, and his metal headgear. Others were horrified. At least two students seemed greatly annoyed by his entrance.

"Should've stuck with Dementor," Ron cursed himself as both he and Kim jumped into battle stances.

"What a coincidence," Kim said going into hero mode. "Ron and I are going back to school and you're going back to jail."

Dementor abruptly stopped looking shocked and confused by the sight of his sworn schoolgirl enemy and her alleged boyfriend.

"I would like for someone to be explaining to me the meaning of this," Dementor said as his confusion converted anger. "Myron!"

The ill-tempered villain's wiry brother-in-law awkwardly shuffled into the room, loaded down with several books and a large stack of papers. Dementor turned to address him in a more hushed but still upset tone.

"What are my sworn enemies doing here in my classroom?"

Myron, trembling under the weight of the books and papers, had trouble coming up with an answer. Kim and Ron both quickly looked at each other to see if they had just heard the same thing.

"Wait," Ron said. "_Your_ classroom?"

"Yes, _my_ classroom, this is College Physics, is it not?" Dementor inquired.

"Okay," Kim interjected. "Are you saying that you're teaching our class?!"

"That is correct, frauline. And am I to be believing that you are taking this class?"

"Hold the phone!" Ron jumped in. "I'm confused. I thought you just called yourself Professor Dementor because it sounded cool."

"Incorrect. Unlike some super villains who give themselves fancy titles for dramatic effect, my professional title was legitimately earned! And in order to keep it current, one must teach a minimum number of hours at an accredited university."

The blonde and the redhead were utterly stupefied; their jaws were agape as they digested the incredible fact that one of their arch foes was now going to teach them college level physics.

"Now, if you two are through with your silly distractions, you may take your seats. Myron! Commence with the distribution of the syllabus!"

As Professor Dementor proceeded to the chalkboard to begin writing the relevant class information, Kim and Ron became painfully aware of the other one hundred and ninety eight pairs of eyes looking at them with contempt and annoyance.


End file.
